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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26015965">Double or Nothing</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glitterb1234/pseuds/Glitterb1234'>Glitterb1234</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Swan Twins [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canon Blending, Crossover, Multi, genderbent</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 05:34:24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>76,712</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26015965</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glitterb1234/pseuds/Glitterb1234</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Bella Swan is not looking forward to her self-imposed exile in Forks, Washington. The only saving grace is the opportunity to spend time with her twin brother Beau and his mysterious girlfriend, Edythe Cullen. Before long, however, Bella finds herself drawn into the strange, unfathomable world of Edythe and her family, most especially her unpredictable brother, Edward.<br/>OR: The Twilight/Life and Death crossover no one asked for.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Edward Cullen/Bella Swan, Edythe Cullen/Beau Swan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Swan Twins [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2043205</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>83</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Prologue: A Request</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>November 11th 1919</em>
</p><p>The city was dark, the house doubly so as he hovered in the shadows watching it. He shouldn’t be here, he knew that. The city was too crowded, too potentially tempting for his still fragile self-control. There were so many ways that this could go horribly wrong. And yet, here he was. He knew that she was proud of his progress, his mentor, his mother, that she wouldn’t have let him come if she didn’t think he could handle it. It would be of little comfort if he failed. Worse, somehow, not to live up to her expectations, than to simply take a life.</p><p>A full year since peace had come to the world. A little more than a year since his world had changed irrevocably.</p><p>He stood in the dark garden of his family’s home, and knew that if any of them could see him, they would not even recognise him. But his parents were dead, snatched by the disease that had almost taken him too. His sister had miraculously been spared and must be far away by now. The house was for sale, he had learned. It was his last chance to return and collect anything he might want. He couldn’t think of anything in particular, but he would look. He would walk through one more time, and maybe he would at least remember.</p><p>The back-door lock was the work of moments to break – he said a silent apology to the new owners for the expense of replacing it – and he slid silent and swift into the black halls. The dark was no impediment to his sight. As he moved from room to room, he was increasingly disturbed.</p><p>The house was completely bare. Gone were the elegant sideboard in the dining room, the wide mahogany table, the matching hall tables where his mother always dropped her shawl and his father left errant papers. Gone were the fine curtains edged with lace, the paintings in gilt frames, the embroidered lounge set. Gone were his mother’s prized silver and her beloved piano. Gone were all but the faintest echos of the memories he had been hoping to find.</p><p>Despair, sharp and unexpected, gripped him and he fell to his knees in the middle of the barren family room, robbed even of its carpets and down to bare boards. He stayed there, like the stone statue his flesh now more closely resembled, for what felt a very long time.</p><p>As he rose to leave, still sorrowful but now loathe to spend another moment here in this hollowed-out shell, a sound caught the very edge of his awareness.</p><p>A heartbeat, weak and thready, but very definitely thrumming somewhere above his head. Just the faintest, muddled tenor of a mind not entirely conscious. A human life, somewhere in the house.</p><p>He froze, statue once more. He knew he should go, knew his control could not be trusted so close to a human with no other witnesses. Yet when he unlocked his muscles, his feet took him toward the stairs, toward the sound, almost without permission.</p><p>Upstairs was more of the same. Almost all the doors had been left open, the winter wind blowing down chimneys and whistling through the house, and he could see that each room was entirely stripped of every trace of his family. He followed the softly beating heart and then, when he saw it, the faint flickering glow of light below the one closed door. It had been his sister’s room, once upon a time; he could still see the floral-decorated ‘E’ carved into the wood, a mirror of the Gothic swirls on his own door across the hall. Quietly, warring with himself all the while, he opened the door.</p><p>A single candle, barely more than a stub, flickered in the far corner of the room. It had melted onto the exposed floorboards and he knew it would be a fair bit of work to prise up. Ashes were in the fireplace, but they had long since burned away, no hint of warmth left. In the wobbly, wavering light, a pile of dirty blankets resolved itself into a human form. A horribly familiar human form.</p><p>“Edythe.”</p><p>The word escaped without him consciously allowing it, along with a rush of air. He quickly stopped his breath, not daring to take in the air that must surely be saturated with her scent.</p><p>His sister rolled weakly towards the sound of his voice. Her hair was tangled and slick with sweat, loose strands sticking to her shining forehead. Cloudy eyes focused on him, still half-hidden in shadow. Her mind was a jumble of delirium, barely able to hold a coherent train of thought, but it fixed on him, recognised him, and, to his surprise, accepted his presence without a hint of astonishment. Her voice, just a breath that crackled out of her lungs as if from underwater, nonetheless reached his sensitive ears.</p><p>“Edward.”</p><p>He was kneeling by her side before he had thought of moving, all thought of thirst banished by just that one terrifying sound. He found her hand, thinner and paler than he remembered, held it delicately like the most precious porcelain.</p><p>She was speaking, though it sounded like every word pained her. “Oh Edward... my brother... you have come... come to take me.”</p><p>“Edythe,” he breathed, bending low over her hand but not daring to kiss it as he ached to. “What happened to you, sister? To the house?”</p><p>“Sold,” she sighed, her green eyes, mirrors of what his had been, sliding closed. “Had to sell it all. You were gone, and Mother and Father. Gone, gone, gone.” In her mind, a headstone bearing three names, the text illegible through the tears of her memory and the fog of her fever. She swallowed heavily but he could see it did nothing for her dry throat. “No more money... couldn’t find work... couldn’t ask for help... too proud.” She laughed at herself now, just one puff of hollow amusement. Her other hand, pressed to her chest, opened slowly, revealing a glittering ring, rows of tiny diamonds glinting in the candlelight. “Kept this... just this... couldn’t let it go... last piece of Mother.” Their mother’s smile danced across her mind’s eye.</p><p>His still heart felt like it would shatter. Could it be possible that her life had fallen apart so thoroughly since his reported death? Clearly, it was. It had.</p><p>She opened her eyes again, pleading now. “Will you take me... to Mother and Father? I’ve wished... so much... to be with you all... a family again.”</p><p>He shook his head. She believed him an angel, a spirit come to guide her on to the next life. She couldn’t know that the gates of Heaven were eternally barred to him. “I’m sorry, Edythe. So sorry. I’m not with them. We won’t be all together again. But you’re going to them.” Of this he was sure. She was good, his darling Edythe. And she was dying. It was not his sickness, he didn’t think, but whatever had hold of his sister would take her in short order. “You take my love to them, you hear me? Be at peace for me.”</p><p>“No!” To his surprise, there was some force behind the word. “No, brother, I want... to be with you. If you... if you live, somehow... I want to stay with you.”</p><p>He shook his head firmly. “You don’t know what you’re asking for, Edythe. This isn’t life, not the life you deserve.”</p><p>She was crying now, tears making tracks down the side of her face, though he wondered that she was hydrated enough to form them. “Nor is... lying here... cold... dying. Please, Edward... please... save me.”</p><p>Her voice faded with every word. Her mind was a whirl of desperate desire, her pleas echoing as she lost the strength to speak, and even those were getting frighteningly faint. Abruptly, he wanted to give in, to give her what she wanted, to carry her to his new mother and ask for the same second chance she had given him. Would this life be easier, somehow, with his sister to share it? Could he curse her to the half-life he lived?</p><p>“Please,” she breathed once more, and his mind was made up. Pocketing the ring lest it fall and be lost, he rose to his feet, scooping up his sister, blankets and all. He turned his back on the candle and the thin mattress that had been her bed, crossing to the French doors that opened onto her balcony. He kicked them – another broken latch – and heard the candle blow out behind him. The night was cloudy; to her weak eyes, it was pitch black. She whimpered softly in his arms and he hushed her gently.</p><p>“Peace, sister. All will be well now,” he murmured, praying that he was not lying to her.</p><p>He leapt from the balcony railing and disappeared into the night, leaving the house silent and dark behind him.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This story popped into my head five years ago after reading Life and Death. My brain likes 'what if' scenarios and this has often been where my stories start. The question 'What if these two different versions of the same character were in fact siblings?' was just too good to pass up. However, after scribbling a few disjointed paragraphs, I ran out of steam and left it alone for years. With the release of Midnight Sun, my creative juices got flowing again and decided to flow into this delightful abandoned project, and here we are :)<br/>An outline of what I changed/used from each book and why can be found in the beginning notes of the first full chapter. Enjoy!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 1: First Sight</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Bella arrives in Forks and has her first interactions with the strange Cullen siblings.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey there :) Glad to see there's some interest in this story already. I'm hoping to upload a new chapter every Friday, although this may slip thanks to the wonders of writer's block and the fact that I go back to work in a few weeks.<br/>In terms of what I'm keeping/using from each book, I've tried to make it a roughly even blend of characters from each story. This includes mixing Cullen family members, human friends, teachers and others. I won't actually list who I'm using here as it will become apparent through the course of the story, but I will say that I've chosen characters based on the relationships that I wanted to retain and the interactions I want to have. Most of the characters will remain largely the same as they were written by Stephenie Meyer, allowing for some creative liberties and twisting them to my own uses. The major changes will be to Beau and Edythe. My Beau has grown up with Charlie, so while he has shared a lot of responsibility he hasn't quite been the teenage parent in the same way he was for Renee. Likewise, Charlie is more comfortable with his role as Dad. Edythe has a different power (to be revealed later) which has a significant impact on the way that she views the world, as does the fact that she came into vampirism with the familiarity of having her brother there to help her. She isn't as angry as Edward and, while she has her moments, her degree of self-loathing is much lower. Crucially, Edythe and Beau have been together for about a year at the beginning of the story, so they've already been through a lot of the relationship drama and figuring things out that Edward and Bella did around the time of Eclipse; they are comfortable and happy together, without loads of tension. Hopefully that will become clearer as the story progresses.<br/>The only other characters I wanted to mention are McKayla and Jeremy, who will be borrowing lines and personality traits from Jessica and Mike as necessary.<br/>Hope you enjoy the story :)</p><p>P.S. This story will follow the plot of Twilight pretty closely, including chapter divides where this makes sense. However, I'm thinking of switching to Beau's point of view for certain sections that aren't substantially changed by the introduction of extra characters, the meadow being the big one that comes to mind. Feel free to let me know in comments if that's something you would find interesting.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>January 17<sup>th</sup> 2005</em>
</p><p>It was raining as the plane touched down on the rough tarmac of the tiny Port Angeles airport. This was not unusual; the Olympic peninsula of Northwest Washington State saw more rainfall every year than anywhere else in the continental United States. It was as far as one could conceivably get from the baking deserts and shifting heathaze of Phoenix, Arizona, the place I had happily called home for the last 12 years of my life. But, with our planned move to Florida still something of a question mark and the vast distance between my mother and her new husband wearing on all of us, I had decided that at least a short period of self-exile was probably in everyone’s best interest.</p><p>Even if it made me feel like crying just imagining it.</p><p>That was overstating things, of course. There was nothing inherently wrong with Forks. But I was too much my mother’s daughter not to feel at least a pang of sadness to be leaving the bright sunshine and warmth behind. The stifling cloud and rain had been one of the reasons Renée had left Forks herself, finally giving up on trying to make her relationship with my father work when the magic of her impetuous infatuation had well and truly worn off. It might have been easier if she hadn’t had two children with him first, something my mother fully admitted, but she was always careful to make sure we both knew she wouldn’t trade us for anything in the world. Still, I had heard “College and career, than boys and babies, okay, Bella?” one too many times not to wonder if there wasn’t perhaps a tinge of regret festering somewhere deep down inside her.</p><p>I knew I could be unfair to Renée sometimes. She was flighty, excitable, and had something of a short attention span when it came to hobbies – or remembering where she’d left her keys – but she was a good mom who’d had to make some difficult decisions in her life: giving up the relative stability of life with Charlie when she had six-month-old twins to take care of; throwing the three of us on the mercy of her disapproving mother, who surprised everyone by taking us in and helping her get through college; admitting, when the topic of custody agreements came up, that she didn’t feel like she could look after both of us on her own; agreeing to split us up, one with her and one to our father, Parent Trap style. That was one choice she had refused to make – which one of us was going to Charlie.</p><p>“I didn’t want either of you to think I didn’t want you,” she’d admitted to me, in one of many probably-too-candid discussions we’d had over the years. “Selfish of me really, and cowardly. We let Gran pick in the end. I think she pulled names out of a hat.”</p><p>So it was that the Swan Twins had gone our separate ways; with the random whim of a piece of paper, I stayed with our mother and my brother Beau was banished to this rainy corner of the world to live with our dad. Not that Beau saw it that way. He was quite happily acclimatised to Forks, his home for all of his memory. We were barely a year old when it all went down, so neither of us actually remembered being together for more than a few weeks at a time. The visitation arrangements had always been an interesting balancing act; one week together with one parent, then one week alone with the parent we didn’t live with, then another week together with the other parent. Rinse, repeat, every summer from the age of four. Renée and Charlie traded off on who got us first, and who had us for holidays. Our birthday was usually spent apart, since it was smack in the middle of the school semester, but we’d always made a point to call each other and send presents. Others would always comment on our unique situation, expressing a whole range of concerns about the impact on our development, but it never much mattered to us; what was normal, except what you habitually experienced? At least it was all fairly amicable. The only hiccup had been when I’d refused to keep coming to Forks when we were fourteen, prompting us to switch to a two week family vacation in California instead.</p><p>Now, I would be living in my father’s house permanently for the first time in 17 years, and the only silver lining I could eke out of the whole affair was getting the chance to spend more time with Charlie and Beau.</p><p>I did smile, despite the downpour, when I saw the two of them waiting for me just past the luggage carousel. They were smiling as well, Charlie the shy slight curve that barely showed beneath his moustache, Beau the giant goofy grin that practically split his face in two. In typical fashion, I practically tripped into their open arms and Beau laughed.</p><p>“Watch it, Bell,” he chuckled. “Dad isn’t strong enough to hold us all up anymore.”</p><p>I scowled up at him, but couldn’t hold onto the ire for long; I was too pleased to see him. Beau and I were fraternal twins – the result of two separate eggs fertilised at the same time – and therefore not precisely identical, but we were startlingly alike. We were both slim, although Beau's height made him lanky and somewhat awkward, while I had been kindly described as ‘petite' by several people. We both took after Renée in terms of facial features, frequently being mistaken for a trio of siblings, much to her delight. We were both pale, even after I’d spent most of my life in the sun, with dark brown hair that curled ever so slightly. We both had a tendency to trip over thin air, blush at the drop of a hat and cry when we were angry. We liked a lot of the same books and music, and very occasionally got caught doing the creepy twin thing of speaking in unison or finishing each other’s sentences. We had learned quickly the many illogical assumptions people made about twins; whispers of ‘telepathic’ had followed us all our lives. It was ridiculous, of course. Twins, especially fraternal ones like us, were no more alike than any other siblings. So what if we’d shared a womb for eight and a half months? It didn’t mean I could somehow tell that something was wrong with Beau from hundreds of miles away.</p><p>Beau, unfortunately, did not share my ridicule of such ideas, and had frequently played at reading my mind when our dad forced me to spend time with him and his friends in our younger years. I indulged him only long enough to satisfy their curiosity, then retreated to the comfortable familiarity of my books. He had always been more outgoing then me, at least within the narrow boundaries of his small group of friends, more like Renée, if only selectively. Somewhat counterintuitivly, I took after Charlie, preferring quiet and solitude. Beau had theorised it all had to do with our eyes; his were blue like Renée’s, while mine shared Charlie’s chocolate brown shade. I had let him know exactly what I thought of that theory, of course – completely ridiculous.</p><p>Still, being with him again felt like coming home, softening some of the sting of spending a protracted amount of time in Forks.</p><p>“Very funny, Beau,” Charlie chuckled, patting us both on the back as he pulled awkwardly out of the hug. Another trait we all shared: discomfort with over enthusiastic shows of emotion. He smoothed his jacket self-consciously. “How are you, Bella? And how’s Renée?”</p><p>I smiled my own small smile. “I’m good, Dad. Mom’s fine. I left her packing up the last few things she needs for Florida.”</p><p>“How’s Phil’s job hunt going?” Beau piped up, clearly eager to hear the news. Our stepfather had earned Beau’s approval before they’d even met each other, purely because he played baseball for a living.</p><p>I shrugged. “Okay, I think. No signing yet but he’s had a few tryouts and got himself on a list or two for spring training, whatever that means.”</p><p>Beau laughed, leaning down to sling the strap of my duffel bag over his shoulder. “We’ll make a sports fan out of you yet, little sister.”</p><p>“Two minutes,” I shot back reflexively. Beau was technically born before me, and liked to remind me of that fact; in return, I always reminded him how slim the window of difference was.</p><p>“Now you two, don’t start,” Charlie chimed in, heavy with sarcasm. Beau and I rarely truly fought, or even bickered much these days. I could count our major arguments on one hand.</p><p>We continued catching up as we walked through the rain to Charlie’s cruiser, my new coat and rainboots getting their first workout. Just as we got in, Beau joining me in the back seat as usual, his phone buzzed in his pocket. He pulled it out to check, and the goofy grin was back, this time with a soft, doting edge that I had only seen a handful of times.</p><p>“Edythe?” I asked, and he turned pink.</p><p>One positive, or at least interesting, part of moving back to Forks, apart from spending more time with the boys, was the chance to finally meet the mysterious Edythe.</p><p>Edythe Cullen and her family had made an impact on the entire town when they moved down from somewhere in the wilds of Alaska two years earlier – not least my hapless brother. After gazing at her from afar for months, he was just building up the courage to try talking to her when she shocked everyone by asking him to the Spring Sadie Hawkins Dance. It had taken him a month to ask her on a follow up date, and another month to ask her to be his girlfriend, but they’d been together ever since and he was deliriously happy. He was oddly shy about talking about her, though he would wax poetic about how amazing she was once you got him going. Weirdly, in all the time since they made things official, Renée and I had never actually met her, or even seen a picture. Renée had gone as far as inviting her to the wedding, hoping that Beau would convince her to come and meet us despite the potentially high-stakes environment of a family celebration. But no such luck; Edythe's own family had apparently been busy that weekend, and she couldn’t get away. It was a reasonable enough excuse, and our mother had accepted it with only the requisite disappointment. I, on the other hand, recognised the tell-tale signs of my brother trying to lie. Neither of us were very good at hiding things – a pair of open books, Mom called us – and we were especially bad at keeping anything from each other.</p><p>Right now, anyone would be able to tell that Beau was utterly smitten with whatever she had just sent him.</p><p>“Shut up,” he muttered, suddenly as shy as he’d been at age ten, admitting he had a crush on McKayla Newton.</p><p>“I said nothing!” I insisted, holding my hands up in surrender. “I’m just looking forward to meeting this girl, at last.”</p><p>“You’ll love her,” Charlie assured me from the driver’s seat, glancing back at us in the rearview mirror. “She’s a wonderful girl, isn’t she, Beau?”</p><p>“Obviously,” Beau replied, curling into his seat and clearly uncomfortable with all the attention. He started tapping away at his phone, holding it in front of his face in a way that was clearly meant to end the conversation.</p><p>I gave him his moment, turning to stare out of the window at the dark green wall of trees that lined the highway. I mulled over the green-ness of it all, so different from the tans, greys and dusty whites of Phoenix. I checked my own phone, finding a text from Renée that had arrived while I was in the air, and sent a blandly positive reply, passing on hellos from Charlie and Beau that they hadn’t actually offered but which would make her happy. But try as I might, I couldn’t shake my curiosity, and my mind strayed to cataloguing what I did know about the girl who seemed to have completely bewitched my brother.</p><p>Edythe was a senior, though only about six months older than us – I had a vague memory of Beau saying her birthday was in February or March. She came from a big family, all adopted by a doctor and her husband. If my memory served me correctly, her younger brother was her only biological sibling; the Cullens had adopted them when they were about ten and eleven, respectively. They had a set of fraternal twins in their family too, a niece and nephew of Mr Cullen’s who had been living with him since they were eight, some kind of long term foster placement. Then there were two sisters, also adopted but not related to each other. I couldn’t remember how old they were, or any of the names, though I must have been told them at some point. Aside from that, all I could recall about Edythe was that she was kind, liked music, did well in school and was very beautiful – all Beau's report, of course. I couldn’t even remember him saying what colour her hair or eyes were, or how tall she was, or anything physical about her. I’d always put it down to Beau's awkwardness; really, what boy wants to tell his mother and sister every little detail about his girlfriend? But shouldn’t I know a little more about her after over a year?</p><p>My musing was interrupted by our arrival at Charlie’s house – home, at least for now. It hadn’t changed at all since the last time I’d been there, or in the nearly 20 years since my parents bought it, to be honest. As we ferried my things inside (just one trip, I didn’t have a lot with me) I noted the yellow cabinets in the kitchen, painted by Renée “to bring some sunshine into the room.” There was the familiar parade of school pictures on the living room mantle, little pairs of faces jostling for space with Charlie and Renée’s one nice wedding portrait and a photo of the four of us at the hospital just after Beau and I were born. There was Charlie’s squishy recliner, facing the TV, and the worn out couch where we’d enjoyed so many movie nights and Saturday morning cartoons over the years. And upstairs, the familiar little bedroom that had always been mine, with its same bed and desk, though the second-hand-looking computer was a new addition.</p><p>Beau and I had shared the room for a while, until we were about seven and it became clear we had outgrown the space, even for the short periods when we both occupied it. Charlie had weighed up the cost of moving to a bigger house – which was Renée’s solution to the same problem in Phoenix – and had eventually decided just to extend this one instead, adding an extra bedroom at the back of the house downstairs. Beau had gotten to choose which room he wanted, and picked the new one because he was allowed to help with the design. One of my favourite memories was the summer when we were nine, when the three of us spent our week together painting both rooms, camping out in the living room to escape the fumes. Now I could still pick out the spot where I had accidentally painted an inch of the skirting board, and the patch of blue Beau had insisted we put beneath the window; there was a matching strip of lavender in his room, the same shade as the walls in here.</p><p>“So we don’t forget about each other,” he had insisted, smiling his gap-toothed smile. Renée had practically melted when he’d asked to do the same thing at her house.</p><p>I ran my finger along the blue stripe and smiled at the memory. When I turned around, Beau was parked firmly on my bed, tapping away at his phone again.</p><p>“Is this what I have to look forward to? A brother who spends all his time talking to his girlfriend?” I teased.</p><p>Beau looked up, a guilty expression on his face until he saw my smirk. He stuck his tongue out at me, then put his phone aside and yanked me down next to him. Of course, I over-balanced and sprawled across the comforter, making both of us laugh. When I sat up, he put his arm around me a squeezed.</p><p>“It is good to have you here, Bella, even if you don’t really want to be.”</p><p>I looked sideways at him, my turn to be guilty now. “Is it that obvious?”</p><p>He shook his head and patted my shoulder reassuringly. “Only to me. I’m pretty sure you have Renée and Charlie fooled.”</p><p>I sighed and slumped further into him, putting my head on his shoulder. “Thanks, that’s very reassuring.”</p><p>I felt more than heard him laugh. “Wait until we get to school tomorrow. Everyone’s dying to meet you and I have told them nothing.” He lifted his hands into a classic evil villain pose. “Mwahaha.”</p><p>I groaned and flopped back on the bed as he left, still chuckling over his own joke.</p><p>Like me, Beau was the primary cook of the household, though for rather different reasons. Renée had a habit of experimenting with food, and the results weren’t always especially palatable. Charlie had once nearly blown up the microwave trying to heat up pasta sauce without taking the lid off the jar. To his credit, he made a mean breakfast spread... but that was about it.</p><p>Beau made beef stroganoff, our Grandma Swan's recipe and a mutual favourite between the three of us. Charlie ate quietly while Beau and I hammered out the framework of a schedule for meals, dishes and who would drive his beast of a truck to and from school every day. Charlie had surprised Beau with the truck as an early birthday present at the start of the school year, bought second hand from a family friend who could no longer drive, and I’d been hearing tales of it ever since. Some of them made me nervous – the noise, the age, the sometimes unreliable gear box – but, just like Beau, I had unexpectedly fallen in love with the beautiful red monster as soon as I saw it parked in the driveway. There was also the small matter of the bathroom – namely, who would use it when. Thankfully that one sorted itself out, since Beau was in the habit of taking morning showers while I had evening ones, so there was only the delicate balance of brushing teeth to contend with.</p><p>Charlie insisted on doing the dishes, then we watched part of a baseball game; seeing how bored I was, Charlie switched it to some mindless sitcom that none of us enjoyed. Beau would periodically bury his nose in his phone, but all in all it was a comfortable evening. If my brother seemed somewhat eager to go to bed, Charlie didn’t comment on it so I felt no need to either, though it did seem odd to me; Beau had always been one to push bedtime when we were little.</p><p>My first night in Forks was restless. The rain drummed on the roof for hours, the pattering sound impossibly loud above my head. I finally passed out from sheer exhaustion around 1AM, then woke before my alarm to the sound of Charlie’s heavy tread on the creaky step halfway down the stairs. I rolled over and tried to sleep for another half hour, before giving up and going to get ready.</p><p>Beau joined me soon after I got downstairs, just in time to say goodbye to Charlie, and we ate a quiet but amiable breakfast. He showed me the jar of cash in the cupboard labelled ‘Food Money’, our source for both lunch money and grocery shopping, before we finally donned our almost matching raincoats and headed out to the truck. He drove, which left me with plenty of time to get even more anxious about his comment from the night before; I hated being the center of attention and the idea of hundreds of curious eyes on me was terrifying.</p><p>The truck pulled noisily into the student parking lot, garnering a few looks but not the staring I had expected. Until we got out, then it felt like everyone was looking at us... at <em>me</em>. Beau didn’t seem bothered; he was looking around as he led me towards the main office, not meeting anyone’s gaze but clearly searching for someone. Probably Edythe. But he didn’t find her before we reached the building, and I saw his shoulders slump ever so slightly. It disoriented me, this new side of my brother. I’d never known him so fixated on anything, except perhaps baseball.</p><p>He introduced me to Mr Cope, the friendly receptionist, who eagerly welcomed me and handed over a schedule and a map. I tried to memorize the latter so I wouldn’t have to walk around staring at it all day. Beau filched my timetable.</p><p>“Looks like we’ve got first period together, that’s good... and Government and Gym. Not much, but it could be worse. Of course you can come sit with us at lunch, we can...”</p><p>His babbling trailed off, and I looked up from my study of the map. Beau was grinning that soft, smitten grin again, staring at something across the lot. I followed his gaze, and my jaw dropped.</p><p>Walking towards us was quite possibly the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. She was slight, no taller than me if I had to guess, slender and delicate. Her features were very fine, set in a slim, smooth face, every aspect perfectly proportioned, not a thing out of place. Her wide, doll-like eyes were dark and ringed by deep circles, almost as if she were recovering from a broken nose... but her nose was as straight and perfect as anything else. She was even paler than us, almost chalky white, with a flowing river of long, copper-coloured hair that seemed to blow out behind her as she walked, like a fashion model turned to face a fan. Her lithe limbs moved with a grace and smoothness that seemed impossible, like she was floating more than walking. She came to a stop right in front of Beau, closer than any casual acquaintance would stand, a small smile on her perfect pale pink lips.</p><p>“Good morning,” she said, and her voice was like honey, rich, smooth and sweet, with an almost musical quality, as if she were singing rather than speaking.</p><p>Beau didn’t say anything in reply, just put an arm around her waist and pulled her in for a kiss. It was soft, chaste, barely more than a touch of lips to lips, and yet I felt the need to look away. There was an intensity to the moment that made me feel like I was intruding on something private. No, something... sacred.</p><p>The girl pulled away first; Beau chased her with his lips and she chuckled, laying a finger on them to stop him.</p><p>“Not now, my love,” she murmured, barely loud enough for me to hear. “Whatever will your sister think of me?”</p><p>Beau blinked and looked at me like he’d forgotten I was even there. “Oh. Right, of course, uh...” He cleared his throat. “Bella, this is Edythe. Edythe, Bella.”</p><p>“I figured,” I joked, the weakness of my own voice making it fall somewhat flat. “Nice to finally meet you, Edythe.”</p><p>I put my hand out and Edythe shook it lightly and quickly, like she didn’t want to hold on for too long. Her hand was freezing cold; the weather maybe, or did she suffer from poor circulation?</p><p>“Likewise,” she said, smiling a beautific smile. “Beau’s told me so much about you. Welcome to Forks High.”</p><p>“Thanks!” I was probably being overly cheerful, but I wanted to make a good impression on Edythe, even more so now that I’d seen her. I reevaluated my earlier assessment of Beau’s bias – she really was stunning.</p><p>“Alright if Bella joins us for lunch?” Beau asked, still a somewhat dreamy tone to his voice.</p><p>“Of course,” Always that lovely smile, yet I was beginning to get a nagging sense that it was somehow forced, just a touch too polite. “I look forward to it. But we should probably all get going, I only wanted to say a quick hello before class.”</p><p>Edythe kissed Beau again, on the cheek this time, then turned and walked away, throwing a breezy, “See you both later,” back over her shoulder.</p><p>“Woah.” I breathed, utterly unable to come up with anything more coherent.</p><p>“Tell me about it,” Beau sighed. “Man, I’m lucky. Well...” He seemed to shake himself slightly and clapped his hands together. “To class we go then.”</p><p>Our morning classes passed pretty much without incident. Beau introduced me to the members of his small, select friendship group that shared our first period English class, and they in turn introduced me to others in the following few hours. A handful of other students introduced themselves too, and almost all of them said the same thing.</p><p>“You must be Beau's sister, Isabella.”</p><p>I corrected each of them – “Bella.” – and suppressed the vindictive urge to remind them that my brother’s full name was Beaufort. I did my best to memorize their faces, though not a single name seemed to be sticking in my head. I tried to at least recall Beau’s close friends: Jeremy, Logan, Tyler, McKayla, Erica and Angela. The boys were somewhat familiar, because I’d met them before; I could see hints of their preteen selves in the faces before me. Mykaela I knew by reputation, and I couldn’t help comparing Beau’s one-time crush to his present partner. <em>Poor girl,</em> I thought. <em>She never had a chance</em>. She seemed nice enough, as did Erica and Angela, though they both had an awkwardness to them that their other friends lacked. Erica’s was more obvious, the nerdy patches on her backpack and her giant thick-lensed glasses speaking volumes. Angela was just quiet, a little like me, I thought. Uncomfortable with attention. I decided quickly that I liked her the best, mainly because she didn’t ask as many questions as the others.</p><p>At last, lunch time rolled around. I walked from Spanish to the cafeteria with Jeremy and McKayla; he flirted with her shamelessly, but she either didn’t notice or was playing hard to get. After we got our food, they led me to a long rectangular table in the middle of the room, where the rest of the group was already gathered. Beau was ostentatiously saving the seats beside and opposite him, bookbag on one and foot on the other, making good use of his long legs. He kicked with his other foot at Tyler when he tried to take the opposite chair, but both boys laughed and I understood that it was a game, not a serious fight. My brother lit up when I reached him, kicking out the chair he was using as a footstool so I could sit in it.</p><p>“Hey Bell,” he said, wide grin firmly in place as he almost absentmindedly waved to McKayla and bumped fists with Jeremy. “You survived your first morning, congrats.”</p><p>I rolled my eyes at him and sat down, cracking open my can of soda to take a sip.</p><p>“Where’s Edythe?” I asked, nodding to his bag and trying to sound casual.</p><p>“She'll be here in a minute,” he replied with a knowing smile; my interest was noted, by him at least. “She’s just checking in with Rosalie about some homework, I think.”</p><p>Just like this morning, I followed his diverted gaze to the other side of the room. And, just like this morning, the sight I saw took my breath away.</p><p>Edythe was stood beside a table in the corner, talking quietly to an absolutely stunning statuesque blonde girl who looked like she had just stepped off the cover of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. Beside her was another girl, a thick brown rope of a braid pulled over her shoulder, her arm resting on the back of the blonde's chair. Even when seated, I could tell she was tall, and well built too, not the lithe slender shape of the other two, but muscled while somehow still retaining a distinctive femininity. I wondered if she played field hockey or volleyball, or maybe swam competitively; that would explain the muscles. The third girl sat at the table was tiny, pixie-like, with a shock of short, artfully messy black hair. She was leaning into the side of another blond, a boy, the other half of the twins perhaps. His hair was more honey where the girl’s was golden, and he wore it longer than most boys I knew, the ends brushing the curve of his jaw. He looked older, like he should be in college rather than high school. The last figure was another boy, younger looking than all the others, even the tiny girl. He had to be Edythe’s biological brother, I decided at once; that bronze hair was far too distinctive not to be a shared genetic trait. He was picking at a sandwich with long fingers, looking bored.</p><p>Edythe alone had been incredible enough, but all the siblings together was like something from another world. They were all <em>gorgeous</em>. And even though I knew that they weren’t all related by blood, I couldn’t ignore the glaring similarities between them. Like Edythe, they were all chalky pale, with dark eyes despite the range of hair tones. There were deep shadows under their eyes, like none of them had gotten a good night’s sleep last night. Each one had a tray of food in front of them, but with the exception of the bronze-haired boy’s fiddling, none of them were even touching it, let alone eating. Apart from Edythe and the sister she was talking to – Rosalie, Beau had said – none of them were looking at each other, simply staring into different corners of the room.</p><p>“Which is which?” I asked Beau quietly, leaning towards him and hoping his friends wouldn’t hear. “I know you’ve told me their names, but...”</p><p>I trailed off, and my brother nodded, not chastising or even teasing me for my lack of attention to his reports.</p><p>“Well, the blonde girl is Rosalie, like I said. The other blond is her brother, Jasper. Then the bigger girl is Eleanor and the little one is Alice. And that of course leaves Edward.” He grinned. “The awkward seventh wheel.”</p><p>Strange, old-fashioned names, like grandparents. I had thought the same thing when Beau first mentioned Edythe, though I knew from his emails that her spelling of the name was a little more unusual.</p><p>I must have looked confused, and must not have been sneaky enough; McKayla leaned in from the seat beside me with the eager smile of a teenage girl with gossip to impart.</p><p>“They’re all <em>together,</em>” she hissed conspiratorially, “Like together, together. Alice and Jasper, and Rosalie and Eleanor. And they <em>live</em> together.”</p><p>There was censure in her tone, especially when she spoke of the two girls being a couple. I couldn’t help frowning; did she have to be quite so small town? This was the 21<sup>st</sup> century, after all.</p><p>Beau didn’t like her tone either. “Drop it, Kay,” he almost growled.</p><p>She waved him off; clearly they’d already had this argument. “I’m just saying, it’s weird. Almost as weird as how Edward doesn’t date at all. Apparently none of the girls here are good enough for him.”</p><p>She sniffed and my frown turned into a smile that I tried to hide behind my drink can. I wondered when he’d turned her down, and resolved to get the story out of Beau later.</p><p>I looked back at the Cullen siblings, to see if Edythe was coming over so I could brace myself for the impact of her presence. She was still talking to Rosalie, but that wasn’t the first thing I noticed. The bronze-haired boy, Edward, had stopped playing with his food and was no longer staring into the middle-distance. Instead, he was looking directly at me. I looked away, my cheeks flushing pink, embarrassed to be caught looking. When I peeked through the fall of my hair a moment later, he was back to his abstraction. Had I imagined the look? It hadn’t been precisely interested, I didn’t think. He still looked hopelessly bored. It was as if someone had called his name and his head had turned reflexively, though he had already decided not to answer them.</p><p>“There certainly are a lot of them,” I mused. “It must be a lot of work for their parents.”</p><p>Beau shrugged. “They pretty much take care of themselves at this point, really. There’s a lot of looks and whispers...” He shot another stern look at McKayla. “... but Carine and Earnest are good people, and I’ve never had a problem with any of the kids. Honestly, you should hear Dad gushing about them. He thinks Carine hung the moon.” He sat up a little straighter, his posture and face clearly meant to mimic Charlie as he quoted him in a gravelly voice. “‘All those teenagers, but never a whit of trouble. Better behaved than some kids whose grandparents grew up here.’”</p><p>Jeremy overheard that one, and flicked a mushroom from his pizza slice at my brother. “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, man. I don’t remember you objecting to teepee-ing Banner's house until after The Chief caught us.”</p><p>Several people laughed at that, and the conversation turned to recalling pranks they – mainly the boys – had pulled over the years. Beau picked the mushroom off his shirt (he'd tried to catch it in his mouth and failed) and chomped on it, smiling. It made me happy, that smile; knowing that my brother was happy here was comforting. At least one of us deserved to have this level of ease around people, this natural aptitude for social connections. It certainly wasn’t me. Of all the things I was already missing about Arizona, I couldn’t honestly name one that was a person, other than Renée.</p><p>Edythe arrived then, sinking gracefully into the seat beside Beau and greeting him with another oddly intimate kiss. I thought perhaps I wasn’t alone in feeling like an intruder to these moments, because the whole table got quieter and no one else really greeted her. I felt the need to make up for the deficit.</p><p>“Hi Edythe,” I said with a brightness that I hoped didn’t seem too forced. “How was your morning?”</p><p>She looked almost taken aback by my question, but in the next split second the polite smile was back. “Pleasantly average, I suppose, thank you for asking, Bella. And yours?”</p><p>“Good. Everyone’s been very welcoming.”</p><p>“I’m glad.” Her reply wasn’t a dismissal, precisely, but it did feel like the end of the conversation. Awkward, I focused on making a bigger dent in my lunch. Edythe had a tray, and she picked at it in much the way her brother had. Beau stole a grape from her fruit salad, but she didn’t chide him, just smiled and fed him another piece of fruit.</p><p>Again, their quiet intimacy had me averting my eyes. Everyone else at the table was either blessedly engaged in other conversations or too far away to comfortably talk to, allowing me a moment’s respite to scan the cafeteria at large. In every direction, curious eyes stared back, and my gaze skipped across all of them, my embarrassment so acute it was almost painful. Remembering the Cullen siblings’ odd non-directed staring, I looked to their table as a potential safe place. To my surprise, Edward was looking at me again, not the bored look anymore but an intense stare, as if there was something about me that confused him. Our eyes held for a long moment, before I dropped mine to my tray, feeling the heat of a blush colour my cheeks. Beau was absorbed in his quiet conversation with Edythe, but I thought I saw her eyeing me, too quick and circumspect for me to read any particular intention in the look. Did she see her brother’s stare and, like me, wonder at its reason?</p><p>Lunch passed, and the students scattered. I watched the Cullens, first Alice alone and then the others together, stand and dump their still full trays. Edythe too seemed to have barely touched her food, apart from what she had given to Beau. Before I could comment, she had swept away to her next class, and Angela was shyly approaching me, offering to walk with me to Biology, which we both had next.</p><p>The class was assembling gradually when we arrived, a typical state for the after lunch period. The teacher, Mr Banner according to my schedule, was in the room but still getting himself organised, and students drifted in without much sense of urgency. Angela quickly crossed the room to her seat, and any hope I might have harboured of spending a bit more time with her was dashed when I saw she already had a partner. It didn’t take me long to locate what seemed to be the only empty seat, in the centre table of the back row, because beside it was the distinctive bronze head of Edward Cullen. Abruptly more nervous than I had been before, I tried to project some kind of calm as I approached the teacher’s desk to have him sign my slip. As I passed the desk that would surely be mine, I glanced sideways, trying to be subtle about it.</p><p>What I saw made me stumble into the table in front of me.</p><p>Edward Cullen was glaring at me, a hatred in his eyes that I could only think to describe as murderous. This close, I could see those eyes were pitch black, barely a distinction between pupil and iris. They bored into me with the force of two black holes, repelling rather than pulling me in. Fear raced up my spine and I felt my heart start to pick up speed.</p><p>I righted myself, muttering an apology to the girl I had almost fallen on top of, and continued to the desk, knowing I must look visibly shaken. Thankfully, Mr Banner didn’t ask me to introduce myself to the class, like Mrs Varner the Trig teacher had, merely handing me a textbook and signing the slip with barely a glance at me. By the time I turned to take my seat, I had composed myself somewhat. Still, I was more nervous than I should have been, sitting down beside Edward. He didn’t speak, didn’t even acknowledge me; he’d shifted his chair so he was as far away from me as the desk allowed, his body tensed and utterly still. When he did look at me, it was still with that brutal, inexplicable anger. I turned my gaze to the tabletop, shaking my hair out to provide a barrier between us. Mr Banner began his lecture, and I hurriedly flipped open my notebook and scrambled for a pen.</p><p>It felt like the longest hour I had ever lived through. I was glad the material was something I’d already covered, because I wasn’t paying very good attention at all. I did my best to take careful notes but couldn’t keep from being distracted by the tension and hostility fairly radiating from the boy beside me. He never relaxed his tense posture, perched on the edge of his stool at the far end of the table. Every time I glanced at him, he was glaring back at me, his temper never seeming to cool. His hand was a fist on his thigh which never loosened. He was so still, it didn’t even look like he was breathing. When the bell finally rang, he shot out of his seat like a jackrabbit and was out of the room before I’d had time to close my books. I watched him go, my mouth slightly agape.</p><p>A low whistle drew my attention to McKayla, who had appeared beside me while I was distracted.</p><p>“Did you stab him with a pencil or something?” she asked, incredulous. “I mean, he’s not the most warm and friendly person on the planet, but that was...”</p><p>Not his usual behaviour, apparently. If I’d had time to hope he was always so violently standoffish, that banished such thoughts.</p><p>“I...I don’t know,” I said, finding it a little hard to speak. “We didn’t even say anything to each other.”</p><p>McKayla raised an eyebrow at that. “You’d think he would at least introduce himself, all things considered. Oh well.” She shrugged dismissively. “I told you he was weird. Let’s go to Gym.”</p><p>I trailed beside her as she chatted about something inconsequential, I couldn’t muster the focus to listen properly. My mind was fixated on that harsh, hateful glare, wondering what had caused it. Something must have happened before I arrived, I decided. He couldn’t possibly hate me so quickly, so completely, without so much as a word exchanged. And yet his focus had been so clearly on <em>me</em>.</p><p>Beau was waiting for us outside the gym. Unlike McKayla, he noticed my strange mood at once, and he was concerned.</p><p>“What’s wrong, what happened?” he asked, hands grasping my arms and ducking his chin to try and meet my eyes.</p><p>“Nothing, it’s nothing,” I tried to reassure him.</p><p>“Edward's her lab partner for Biology, but he was giving her the stink eye all through class,” McKayla chimed in helpfully. “Didn’t introduce himself or anything, did he, Bella?”</p><p>Beau’s eyes widened, a wordless request for confirmation.</p><p>“It’s fine, I’m fine,” I insisted. “I’ll tell you later, okay? I don’t want to be late.”</p><p>He let it go, thankfully, though he frowned and I knew he would hold me to that promise of ‘later’.</p><p>Coach Clapp issued me a uniform but thankfully didn’t make me change. I watched from the sidelines as my new classmates played three-a-side volleyball with varying levels of skill. I smiled just a little watching Beau play. Despite his love of baseball, my brother was not athletic in the slightest, something else we shared. He was convinced our balance issues had to have some kind of medical explanation, as did our tendency to faint at the merest hint of blood. I knew we were just somehow both chronically clumsy. His team generally tried to stay out of his way and keep him from having to get involved, but their opponents would occasionally take advantage of the handicap he provided. Twice the ball hit him squarely on the top of the head, and he took so many tumbles I lost count. McKayla and Logan, who had gallantly agreed to be his team, were visibly exasperated.</p><p>I went to hand in my paperwork while Beau changed, feeling a little bit better. His performance in Gym had amused me enough to lift my spirits. As soon as I entered the office, they plummeted again.</p><p>Edward Cullen was at the desk, arguing with Mr Cope. I quickly realised that he was trying to switch out of his sixth hour Biology class to another option, any other option – another time, another course, permission to take the time for independent study. I was aghast all over again. Something must have happened before I arrived, he must have some issue with the teacher or another classmate. This couldn’t possibly be about me... and yet I couldn’t shake the feeling that it was. How horribly narcissistic of me.</p><p>Another girl opened the door while I stood there, plastered against the wall in fear. She didn’t pause, just put a slip of paper into the basket and dashed out again, but Edward stiffened and turned, the glare already fixed on his face before he even saw me.</p><p>“Never mind then,” he said, and the words were nearly a growl. “I can see it’s impossible. Thank you for your help.”</p><p>He swept out of the room as quickly as he had left Biology, like something was chasing him. I had to blink a few times and take a deep shaky breath before I could approach the counter to hand in my completed form.</p><p>“Good first day, dear?” Mr Cope asked kindly.</p><p>I couldn’t speak; I just nodded and left as quickly as I could.</p><p>Beau was waiting by the truck, an expectant look on his face, but he held his questions at least for the moment. A silver Volvo pealed past us, too fast to see the driver; another shiny white car, much newer than any of the others in the lot, followed at a slightly more sedate pace, and I could see Edythe was driving this one, her sisters in the back seat. Of course, they were rich as well as beautiful. Twas ever thus.</p><p>We were on the road ourselves before my brother launched his interrogation. “Well? What the hell happened in Biology?”</p><p>I gave him the run down, not editing or leaving things out as I might have done with someone else. Beau and I had long since agreed not to keep secrets from each other, a very ‘us against the world’ mentality to be sure, but it worked for us, kept us close across hundreds of miles of distance.</p><p>He was quiet when I finished, contemplating it all with more seriousness than I had expected.</p><p>“It can’t be me, right?” I prompted. I needed some reassurance. “Something else must have happened to put him in that mood. Has Edythe mentioned anything?”</p><p>“No,” he shook his head. “No, she hasn’t said anything. Edward’s pretty reserved though, doesn’t even really talk to the others that much. I’m sure you’re right, there must be something else going on. I can ask-"</p><p>“No, no, don’t do that,” I said hurriedly. No need to reveal my self-absorption to Edythe when we still barely knew each other. “It’s fine. I can handle it.”</p><p>But, though I braced for either renewed hostility or some kind of explanation the next day, I was disappointed. Edward wasn’t at school. He wasn’t there all week, though the others still sat at their table across the cafeteria. Edythe still came to greet Beau each morning, sat beside him each lunchtime, said goodbye each afternoon outside the gym. None of them gave any sign that there was anything wrong. When Beau finally asked after Edward on Thursday, his own curiosity apparently getting the better of him, Edythe brushed him off.</p><p>“He’s not feeling well, that’s all,” she said, so confidently one couldn’t help but believe her. “He’s fine, nothing serious, but Carine is being overcautious and Earnest is babying him, as usual.”</p><p>She’d rolled her eyes, clearly showing how ridiculous she thought that was. It was the reasonable explanation I had been waiting for, and it made perfect sense. Oddly, it was Beau’s expression that made me doubt it, some little twist to the set of his mouth, even as he asked her to pass on a get well soon from us, that made me think there was something else going on and he knew what it was. But the only other answer that made any sense, that Edward was avoiding me for some unknown reason, was so ludicrous and self-centred that I knew I shouldn’t even consider it.</p><p>My new lab partner’s sudden unexpected disappearance notwithstanding, that first week was uneventful. I joined in with Gym, the coach very careful to make sure Beau and I weren’t on the same team after the first day, when poor Logan was practically playing alone. I settled into my classes and got to know Beau’s circle better. I could recognise most of the school and name 90% of the people I had classes with. At home, we moved around each other seamlessly and the various rotas we’d put in place worked a charm; it was as if we had lived together all our lives. We did a grocery shop together and I knew I would be able to manage the next one by myself, including stashing everything in the kitchen according to Beau’s exacting system of organisation. The weekend too passed without incident. Charlie worked for most of it, picking up extra shifts to cover someone else’s vacation time, and Beau was with Edythe at her house practically sunup to sundown on Saturday and almost as long on Sunday. Having the house to myself was nice, and I took the chance to get ahead on a few assignments, do some chores and send a bogusly cheerful email to Renée. Whenever my mind strayed to the bizarre bronze-haired boy and his terrifying glare, I very firmly found something else for it to do.</p>
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<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 2: Open Book</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Bella and Edward have their first conversation.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Two apologies:<br/>First, that this chapter is being posted so late in the day (for my fellow UK peeps at least) I think I genuinely blanked the fact that it was Friday until like, 9pm, then I had to do a read-through before I posted. But at least I got it up before midnight!<br/>Second, that it is so much shorter than chapter 1. As I said, I will be roughly following the chapter break points of the original novel, which means that they will vary in length at times anyway.<br/>Hope you enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When the next Monday morning dawned, I was surprised to find that I actually felt more rested. I’d been running on fumes by Friday, unable to adjust to the constant drumming of rain on the roof enough to get any decent sleep, but I thought perhaps it hadn’t rained quite as hard that night and as a result I hadn’t woken as many times, hadn’t taken quite so long to fall asleep. I didn’t know whether to rejoice or despair that I was apparently acclimatising to Forks already.</p><p>It was business as usual all morning: Charlie left early, Beau and I ate breakfast and helped ourselves to lunch money; I drove to school, and he didn’t have to remind me where to turn off the highway; I greeted our friends, as they had now become, and Edythe with a warmness that was distinctly more genuine; classes passed with their established level of tedium and predictability.</p><p>The one break in the pattern was the snow. It began drifting down just as we were leaving English, clumps of white cotton floating through the air and settling on everyone’s hair. I pulled my hood up and made a face. McKayla, who I was learning could be very keen-eyed exactly when I didn’t want her to be, noticed my disgust.</p><p>“Not fond of snow, Bella?” she asked coyly.</p><p>Beau, walking beside me, laughed. “Of course not, God forbid anything cold and wet has the audacity to land on my sister.”</p><p>He tweaked the back of my hood, but I anticipated him and held it on with one hand.</p><p>“Snow just means it’s too cold for rain. Besides, isn’t it supposed to fall in flakes?” I complained. “Each one unique, and all that?”</p><p>This time, the whole group around me laughed.</p><p>“You’ve never actually seen snow, have you?” Erica chimed in from behind my shoulder.</p><p>“I have,” I insisted stubbornly.</p><p>“In movies,” Beau added, oh so helpful as always. I shoved him vengefully, sending him wheeling into Tyler as he approached from another building. The girls fell about laughing as Tyler made a show of catching and righting Beau, brushing imaginary dirt from his coat. They started discussing plans for a snowball fight after school, pre-emptively dividing the group into teams. I shook my head at the childishness and led the way into building 6 for Government.</p><p>By lunch, the snow was definitely sticking and, though it wasn’t quite deep enough just yet, there were baby snowballs and handfuls of slush already flying as I walked to the cafeteria. Out of habit, my eyes scanned over the room as I waited in line with McKayla and Jeremy, like every day. The half of the group who always seemed to be dismissed earlier than us – Senor Goff had a habit of setting homework after the bell had rung – was already seated at our regular table, and all the Cullens but Edythe were in their place too. I stiffened; <em>all </em>of them were there. Edward’s distinctive bronze hair stood out among the more common shades of his siblings. Eleanor was theatrically ringing snow-water out of her messy ponytail and the others were laughing at her antics. It was quite the cheerful picture; they were enjoying the snow day too. They looked a little more like a scene from a holiday romcom than the rest of us, of course. There was something different about the group as I studied them, and it took a moment for me to put my finger on it. I decided they all looked less pale, especially Edward. Probably flushed from their snowball fight.</p><p>The sight of Edward and the memory of his hateful looks last week set my stomach churning. Not trusting myself not to puke out of sheer nervousness, I chose a light lunch, just a plain cheese sandwich and a carton of milk. Hopefully the dairy would counterbalance the acid roiling in my gut.</p><p>I could see that my brother noticed my suddenly apprehensive mood, but he was kind enough not to mention it in front of everyone. Edythe, already settled beside him today, was also eying me as if expecting something, but didn’t comment. It was Jeremy who first spoke to me, nudging me with his elbow.</p><p>“Hey, Bella, Edward Cullen’s staring at you.”</p><p>I stiffened, glancing at Edythe, but she seemed distracted by Beau.</p><p>“He doesn’t look... angry, does he?” I asked nervously, whispering only loud enough to be heard by Jeremy.</p><p>“Um, no?” His reply was so perplexed, it came out sounding like a question. “Should he?”</p><p>“I guess not,” I conceded, not elaborating; he had to have heard the story of Edward’s strange reaction last week from McKayla.</p><p>As surreptitiously as I could, I looked over to the Cullens’ table. Sure enough, the other four were back to gazing into space as usual, but Edward was conspicuously focused on me. Jeremy was right that his look wasn’t angry; it was contemplative, searching, as if he were trying to figure out something about me that confused him. Perhaps a touch frustrated. It was no less intense than his glare, however. I could only hold my gaze on his for a few seconds before I felt the need to look away.</p><p>I resolved to keep my eyes on my table for the rest of lunch. And yet, my insatiable curiosity propelled me to turn to Edythe and say, “I’m glad your brother is feeling better.”</p><p>She nodded once, tightly, a polite acknowledgment and no more. The one member of my brother’s social circle – now mine too – that I should have been getting to know best was, paradoxically, the one that I still felt I knew least. We could never get past vague pleasantries and small talk; she seemed to be holding back from me for some reason I couldn’t fathom.</p><p>My brother was on my side for once.</p><p>“Maybe he’ll be in a better mood today,” he chipped in, a note of prompting in his tone that she couldn’t fail to recognise. “You know, if he’s not feeling sick.”</p><p>“Maybe,” Edythe mused distantly, like she didn’t much care either way. “I wouldn’t hold out hope for any chatter from him, though. He’s always been taciturn by nature.”</p><p><em>As long as he doesn’t glare, </em>I thought to myself. <em>He doesn’t have to talk, but I can’t handle another hour of that awful glare.</em></p><p>I nibbled at my sandwich, the anticipation of the next class period still twisting my stomach. The milk helped, but I was only able to force down half my food before the end of the lunch hour. Beau noticed; he held me up at the back of the group before we could go our separate ways.</p><p>“Ditch class if he’s being awful again,” he said softly, a fervent protective edge to his voice that was entirely new to me. “Tell Banner you feel sick and need to go to the nurse, it won’t be a stretch with the way you look.”</p><p>I bristled a little at that. Rude. “What kind of brother encourages his sister to skip school over some boy?”</p><p>“You’ll catch up, you’re smarter than most of the others,” he insisted, confident in me rather than dismissive of our peers. “One class isn’t worth you being miserable.”</p><p>“I’ll be fine, Beau,” I said tersely, annoyed by his hovering. “I have to go, Angela’s probably waiting to walk with me.”</p><p>I strode away from his fussing, mercifully not tripping as I sped up. Angela was indeed waiting for me, as was McKayla; the former looked concerned, the latter, eager.</p><p>“Domestic dispute?” McKayla asked, joking and probing at the same time.</p><p>“Just sibling stuff,” I replied dismissively. “Nothing to worry about.”</p><p>McKayla looked like she wanted to press for more details, but Angela asked her a question about a piece of homework in another class they shared. Bless her. Angela was definitely turning out to be the best of my new friends.</p><p>There was a chorus of groans as the crowd of students got outside – it was raining, and the snow was rapidly washing away. I just smiled surreptitiously and put my hood up again.</p><p>We made our way into the classroom and I was ever so slightly relieved to see that my table was still empty. Edward hadn’t arrived yet. Mr Banner was moving around the room distributing a microscope and box of slides to each pair.</p><p>Angela led McKayla away rather than letting her stand chattering at my table as she often did. I sat doodling absentmindedly on my notebook, a pattern of loops within loops in the top corner of the cover. The chair beside me scraped back and my pen faltered, missing a loop so the design became unbalanced. I braced myself for the hatred.</p><p>“Hello.”</p><p>I looked up, startled to hear him actually speak to me. Like his sister, Edward had a melodic voice with a slightly otherworldly feeling to it, though of course his was at least an octave deeper. He was still sat as far from me as he could without leaving the desk, but he had angled his seat toward me today. His posture was open, just the barest hint of tension visible in the stiffness of his spine. I stared at him with my mouth open like a fish.</p><p>“I didn’t get a chance to introduce myself last week,” he went on when I said nothing. “My name is Edward Cullen. You must be Bella Swan.”</p><p>He didn’t offer his hand, just watched me expectantly. I nodded weakly.</p><p>“H-hi Edward,” I said, hating how my voice cracked. I cleared my throat. “I’m glad you’re better, your sister said you were sick.”</p><p>He looked down with a soft half-smile, beautifully bashful. “Yes, thank you. A nasty stomach bug, I’m afraid. I must apologise for my frightful behaviour last week. I was already feeling the beginnings of my illness and it had me in a foul temper. Please forgive me.”</p><p>I had already noticed the somewhat antiquated way that Edythe sometimes spoke, her words and cadence seeming to come from another time. Edward spoke in just the same way.</p><p>“It’s fine,” I muttered, averting my gaze from his piercing look. There was something different, beyond his calmer mood, but I couldn’t put my finger on it.</p><p>Mr Banner started class then, explaining the lab we were going to be doing today. The boxes of slides were onion root tip cells representing phases of mitosis, but they were out of order. We had to work together, without our books, to identify the stages and write them on our worksheets.</p><p>“Get started,” he ordered, and the room immediately hummed with conversation and the clinking of glass.</p><p>“Ladies first, partner?” Edward said, calm and composed, though I felt sure there was still a tense set to his shoulders.</p><p>I pulled the microscope closer to me, slid in slide number one and looked through the eye piece. It wasn’t hard to identify.</p><p>“That’s prophase,” I said confidently, reaching for the next slide.</p><p>“Mind if I check?”</p><p>He reached out to stop me changing the slide, our hands connecting ever so slightly. His fingers were icy cold, like his sister, as if he’d been holding them in a snow drift before class. Unlike with his sister, a spark of electricity jolted through me, centred on the point where our skin touched. I jerked my hand back sharply, as if I’d been burned. Edward retracted his hand too, muttering an apology, then reached for the microscope again, carefully avoiding touching me. He drew it towards himself, glanced into the eye piece for just a fraction of a second then said, “Prophase,” and wrote the word neatly on the top line of our sheet. His handwriting was gorgeous, like calligraphy but apparently requiring a fraction of the effort for him. He’d filled out our names too, without me noticing; ‘Bella Swan’ had never looked so pretty.</p><p>Edward deftly changed out the slides, took another too-fast glance through the microscope and muttered, “Anaphase,” as he filled in the next line.</p><p>“Can I check?” I asked, echoing his earlier question.</p><p>He looked amused but passed me the microscope. I had to look at it just a little longer than he had, but I saw at once that he was right. Weirdly, both those facts annoyed me.</p><p>“Anaphase.” I agreed, trying to sound breezy and unaffected.</p><p>“Like I said,” was his matter-of-fact response.</p><p>We completed the lab like that, passing the microscope back and forth, each checking the other’s assessment and taking turns to swap the slides. When he had to pass me one, he dropped it into my hand without touching me. Had he felt that strange charge too?</p><p>We were finished before anyone else was close. I could see McKayla and her partner comparing two slides over and over, and the pair in front of us had their book open under the table. I went back to doodling on my notebook. I had the peculiar sensation that I was being watched; sure enough, when I turned my head, Edward was staring at me. He looked as if he was about to say something, but Mr Banner approached us.</p><p>“Taking a break?” he asked in a tone aiming for casual but just a tad too close to reprimanding. He saw our completed sheet and spun it towards himself, glancing down the list then checking our answers more carefully.</p><p>“Well, Edward, didn’t you think Isabella should have a chance to join in? Putting her name on the sheet doesn’t guarantee her the credit, you know.”</p><p>“Bella,” Edward corrected, which startled me. Even Beau didn’t do that. “And she actually identified three out of five.”</p><p>“We checked each other’s work,” I chimed in. For some reason, it felt wrong for him to downplay his part like that.</p><p>Mr Banner looked surprised, then thoughtful. “Have you done this lab before?”</p><p>“Not with onion root,” I admitted.</p><p>“White fish blastula?”</p><p>“Yes sir.”</p><p>“Were you in an advanced placement program in Phoenix?”</p><p>I felt myself go pink. So far, I’d managed to avoid being outed as a total nerd, but that was apparently over.</p><p>“Yes, I was.”</p><p>“Hm.” Mr Banner eyed us both once more, then shrugged slightly. “Well, I suppose it’s a good thing you two are partners.”</p><p>He walked away to check on some other pairs. Edward was still staring at me, that look of some kind of unmet expectation back in his eyes.</p><p>“What?” I asked, a little terse. He was beginning to annoy me.</p><p>“Nothing,” he said, quiet, thoughtful. Then he changed the subject. “It’s too bad about the snow, isn’t it?”</p><p>I wrinkled my nose. “Not really. My brother was planning some kind of battle of the blizzard after school. At least now we can go straight home.”</p><p>“You don’t like the cold very much.”</p><p>It was a statement – a weirdly amused statement – but I answered as if it were a question.</p><p>“No, not really. I take after my mom that way, I guess. I don’t love the wet either.”</p><p>“Forks must be a difficult place for you to live,” he mused, still eyeing me speculatively.</p><p>“You have no idea,” I muttered blackly.</p><p>“Then may I ask why you came?”</p><p>No one had asked me that, so blunt and sudden. I assumed Beau had explained it in some way to everyone who mattered; Edward had to have heard it from Edythe. Did he really not pay attention to anything?</p><p>“Well, you might have heard from Beau,” I said, watching his face carefully, hoping it would give something away. “Our mother got remarried.”</p><p>“Ah.” It was a sound of understanding, like suddenly everything made sense to him. “I do recall. You invited my sister.”</p><p>“That’s right. But you guys were busy, I think.”</p><p>He hummed and deftly returned to the topic at hand, apparently refusing to be distracted. “And you don’t like him.”</p><p>Another assumption. This guy thought he had me pegged.</p><p> “No, Phil is fine. A little young, maybe, but he makes her happy.”</p><p>“Then why?” He looked so confused, like I was presenting him with a complex math problem.</p><p>I decided to stop being coy. “Didn’t Beau tell you all of this? Or Edythe?”</p><p>He rubbed the back of his neck, the picture of chagrin. “Would you be terribly annoyed if I said I wasn’t quite listening?”</p><p>I smiled, just a little. <em>Oh, I’ve got your number, mister.</em></p><p>I threw the poor boy a lifeline. “Phil plays ball for a living. Not well,” I hastened to add. “Strictly minor league. But he travels a lot, and he’s in the market for a new team. My mom stayed with me at first, but I could tell she missed him.”</p><p>“So, she sent you here so she could travel with him.”</p><p>Yet another assumption, supremely confident this time. Where does he get off on deciding he knew my family so well?</p><p>“No one <em>sent </em>me,” I replied acerbically. “I sent myself. She’ll be happier out in Florida with him.”</p><p>“But now you’re unhappy.”</p><p>“And?” I countered.</p><p>He was sad now, with a knowing tinge, like he’d figured out something about me that he didn’t like. “That doesn’t seem very fair.”</p><p>“Didn’t anyone ever tell you?” I said with a shrug. “Life isn’t fair. Besides, it’s not all bad. I have Beau, and Charlie – I mean, my dad. They’re worth a few months of cold and wet.”</p><p>Edward studied my face for a moment with an intensity that was starting to make me uncomfortable.</p><p>“You put on a good show,” he said softly. “But I’d be willing to bet you’re suffering more than you let anyone see. Even your brother.”</p><p>I laughed once without much humour. He looked thrown by that reaction, and I answered his unspoken question.</p><p>“My mother always calls us her open books, Beau and I both. She says it’s why we’re so bad at lying, everyone can tell what we’re thinking like it’s projected on our foreheads.”</p><p>Edward thought about that. “I can see it, for Beau. But I’m afraid I find you very hard to read.”</p><p>“You must be a good reader,” I said flippantly, trying to lighten the mood.</p><p>He didn’t bite, staying deadly serious. “Usually.”</p><p>With his eyes burning into mine so forcefully, I finally pinpointed what had changed about him, the thing that had been eluding me.</p><p>“Did you get contacts?” I blurted, like an idiot.</p><p>He frowned. “No, why?”</p><p>“Oh,” I huffed, the wind going out of my sails slightly. “I just... thought there was something different about your eyes. Sorry.”</p><p>He hummed noncommittally, turning away from me. His shoulders, which had been gradually relaxing, tensed again.</p><p>In fact, I was sure that his eyes had changed. I would never, as long as I lived, forget the black holes of fury that they had been last week. Today, they were a completely different colour, a strange shade of tawny gold, like the pelt of a lion I had once seen on a trip to the Natural History Museum.</p><p>Mr Banner called everyone back together then, going through the lab and pointing out the things we should have noticed on transparencies on the overhead projector. I made careful notes, even though I knew it all already. Edward took no notes, seeming preoccupied with something. When the bell rang, he shot out of his seat once again, out of the door before anyone else had picked up their bag.</p><p>“He is so <em>weird</em>!” McKayla griped from behind me as I watched the empty doorway.</p><p>“Yeah,” I agreed. “Weird.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 3: Phenomenon</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>An accident leaves Bella feeling there is more to the mysterious Cullens than meets the eye.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I did it again &gt;.&lt; So sorry for the late upload, hope you enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I woke up the next morning to an entirely new sensation, at least since coming to Forks: complete well-restedness. For the first time in over a week, I wasn’t tired. It didn’t take long to figure out why - the hammer of raindrops was conspicuously absent. I jumped up and looked out of the window, half believing it was a trick. Then I groaned.</p><p>It wasn’t raining, but it had snowed again in the night. The whole world was buried under a blanket of white. More worryingly, yesterday’s rain had frozen, the trees decked with crystals and the driveway a sleek sheet of ice. I dressed in my warmest clothes, trying to recall how much tread there was on my boots. I could already guess that I was going to have an interesting day, balance-wise.</p><p>Charlie was already gone, and Beau was fairly buzzing with excitement when we both got downstairs.</p><p>“It’s not a snow day, worse luck,” he said around a mouthful of cereal, not sounding overly glum. “They’ll have cleared the parking lot and all the sidewalks by the time we get there. But that means plenty of drifts to work with.”</p><p>I heard what he didn’t say: plenty of ammunition.</p><p>“Will we be okay driving?” I asked. This was my main concern. “There’s bound to be ice, right?”</p><p>“Oh yeah.” He frowned, like that hadn’t occurred to him before. “I think we have some snow chains in the garage.”</p><p>In the end, we didn’t have to go looking. As soon as we stepped outside, I spotted the thin web of silver chain links that crisscrossed the tyres of the truck. Charlie must have got up God knew how early to put them on. I felt a lump rising in my throat; I wasn’t used to someone looking out for me like that.</p><p>Beau had no such issues. “Good old Dad. I’ll have to make him something special tonight to say thanks.”</p><p>It was Beau’s turn to drive, and he went carefully despite the chains. We made it to school without issue, the truck never swerving an inch. Beau patted the dashboard affectionately, like the car was a well-behaved pet.</p><p>“That’s my favourite girl,” he said. My brother wasn’t obsessed with cars, but, to my intense embarrassment, he was among that regrettable proportion of teen boys that treated their vehicle like it was sentient.</p><p>“Don’t let Edythe hear you say that,” I teased as we hopped out. He scooped up a handful of the snow I hadn’t seen collected in the truck bed and flung it into my face, then strode away across the blacktop, cackling.</p><p>Cursing his long limbs and wiping snow from my eyes, I circled around the back of the truck to catch up with him. My boots were not proving to be as grippy as I would have liked; at the back corner, I almost fell and had to pause to get my balance.</p><p>A sudden shriek of metal broke through the excited hum of teenage voices. I looked up and registered several things at once. Not slow motion, but adrenaline pushing my brain to think faster, see more, in the split second it comprehended what was happening.</p><p>The first thing I registered was Edward. He stood by his car a few spaces over, the small, slight form of his sister Alice beside him. His eyes were wide, horrified, staring at me and just turning to the source of the noise.</p><p>Tyler’s dark blue van, hurtling sideways across the parking lot, wheels locked and brakes shrieking. Headed straight towards me.</p><p>I also realised instinctively that the adrenaline surge wasn’t enough to get me out of harm’s way. I was going to be crushed between the side of the van and the back of the truck. I closed my eyes and hoped it would be over quickly.</p><p>Something slammed into me, but not the unyielding sheet of metal I had been expecting, and from entirely the wrong direction. My body flew for half a second, then hit the ground, my head cracking against the blacktop. I lay there, stunned, my brain trying to catch up with what the hell was happening.</p><p>A melodious voice swore from somewhere above my head. Blinking, I finally focused on the slim, pale form of Edward Cullen, looming over me as I lay on the pavement behind the tan car in the next spot over. His hands were pressed against the side of the van, fitting perfectly into two large dents in the passenger door. Then I saw what had provoked the cussing – the van hadn’t stopped, but was curving around the truck bed, heading for my sprawled-out legs, seemingly determined to cause me some kind of injury.</p><p>Edward pulled his hands from the side of the van, one going under the edge of the chassis while the other arm slide around my waist. He heaved just slightly, and the van tipped up onto its far tyres, the whole passenger side off the ground. Edward swung me gently but firmly in the little bubble of space between the vehicles; as soon as my legs were clear, the van dropped with a sickening crunch, all the windows shattering as it bounced back to four wheels.</p><p>There was a moment of complete silence, such a counterpoint from the brief surge of horrible noise that it was almost jarring. Then the screaming started.</p><p>Dimly, as if through water, I heard several voices calling my name. The only one I recognised was Beau, frantic, nearly shrieking, his voice cracking. But the most part of my attention was focused on Edward. And all his attention was on me.</p><p>“Bella,” he said, low and urgent. “Are you alright?”</p><p>“I-I think so,” I stammered, trying to sit up.</p><p>“Careful,” he warned. “I think you hit your head pretty hard.”</p><p>The words made me aware of a throbbing pain centred just behind my left ear.</p><p>“Ow,” I moaned, almost surprised by the sudden awareness of pain.</p><p>Edward’s smile was grim. “That’s what I thought.”</p><p>I squirmed again, and this time he let me up, moving to sit as far from me as he could in the limited space. The movement drew my attention to the dent in the tan car, the exact size and shape of his shoulders where he had braced himself to hold up the van.</p><p>Which was completely impossible.</p><p>I tried to stand, but he held out a hand to stop me.</p><p>“Sit tight, they’ll have us out soon,” he reassured me. Sure enough, I could hear someone shouting at us to stay put, yells about getting Tyler out, the authoritative bark of teachers arriving on the scene and the distant wail of sirens.</p><p>I groaned. Attention, my old nemesis, had well and truly found me.</p><p>“Does your head hurt?” Edward asked, his low voice somehow gravely and smooth all at once.</p><p>I ignored the question in favour of asking my own. “How did you get over here so fast?”</p><p>His eyes were startled for just a fraction of a second, then his face smoothed. “I was right next to you, Bella.”</p><p>I shook my head, wincing when it made the throbbing flare. “No, you were by your car, all the way over there.” I gestured vaguely in the direction of his vehicle.</p><p>“Bella.” His eyes had turned intense now, pleading, like he desperately needed me to believe what he was saying. “I was stood right next to you and I pushed you out of the way.”</p><p>“No!” I insisted stubbornly; this was starting to feel like an argument with my brother at his most moronic.</p><p>“Bella, please.” He was really begging now, and it was all just too much – the voice, the eyes, the complete sincerity. I was muddled and unable to hold form.</p><p>“Fine,” I conceded. “But will you promise to explain later?”</p><p>“Fine,” he echoed, abruptly annoyed.</p><p>We studiously avoided looking at each other while a team of EMTs and teachers moved the van far enough to get stretchers in. I could see Beau right at the front of the curious crowd, pushing forward and barely held back by more staff members. My twin's face was insensible with worry and he barely seemed to register Edythe’s white hand on his arm, trying to calm him.</p><p>The EMT in front greeted Edward by name, obviously a friend of his mother’s, and he quickly took control of the conversation: he was fine, but I had hit my head badly. As soon as he said the word concussion, the medics were all over me, and my protests were ignored. I thought I might die of embarrassment when the neck brace came out.</p><p>Beau was at my side as soon as he could reach me, snapping at the man trying to keep him back.</p><p>“She’s my sister!” he yelled. “Bella, are you okay? Did it get you, did it-"</p><p>“I’m fine, Beau,” I shouted back, thoroughly annoyed and tomato red. In my peripheral vision I could see Edward climbing calmly into the front seat of the ambulance they were about to load me into.</p><p>To make matters worse, Charlie showed up at that exact moment. Two frantic, overprotective Swan boys was a force I hadn’t been exposed to before and I felt instantly overwhelmed. So did the poor EMT who Charlie turned to for details when I would only insist that I was perfectly fine.</p><p>“Hop in, son,” one of them said kindly to Beau once they had me settled, pulling him in as Charlie yelled that he would follow in the cruiser. “There you go, hun, your brother’s here to keep you company.”</p><p>“Thanks so much,” I muttered.</p><p>The sarcasm in my tone seemed to finally settle my poor brother’s nerves. His tense shoulders slumped, and he huffed a weak laugh. “Hush, you. Jeez, I leave you alone for two seconds...”</p><p>I pushed against his arm, and the shove was weaker than I liked.</p><p>“Stop, nothing happened,” I grumbled, then paused and decided to try out the new lie. “Edward pushed me out of the way.”</p><p>Beau glanced at the untidy bronze mop just visible in the front seat.</p><p>“Sure he did,” he mumbled, a strange note to his voice that confused me. He knew I was lying, which wasn’t a surprise. But it was more, like he might actually have a sense of what had really happened. Had he noticed the dents, pushed so close to the action as he had been?</p><p>We rode the rest of the way to the hospital in silence. Once we got there, they let Beau stay with me in my little corner of the ER. A nurse checked my vitals, then walked away without bothering to close the pastel curtains around the bed. Well, if they weren’t going to give me any privacy, the brace had to go. I yanked at the Velcro, ignoring Beau’s protests and batting away his interfering hands. I tossed the offending object under the bed and gave him a look that dared him to tell on me. Thankfully, he was distracted by a flurry of activity as another figure was deposited on the bed next to mine. Tyler was half-concealed by bandages wound around his head, blood already soaking them through; the nurse began unwinding them to check the damage more closely. I glanced at Beau, fearing the red menace would set off a fainting spell, but he was holding firm. His friend looked a lot worse than me, and his concern was apparently overpowering his weak vasovagal system. Oddly, I wasn’t as bothered by it as I normally would have been either.</p><p>Despite the state he was in, Tyler was looking at me with just as much frantic worry as my family. “Bella, are you okay? I’m so sorry, I was going too fast, hit the ice wrong. Beau, man, I’m so sorry.”</p><p>“It’s fine, Tyler,” we replied in unison.</p><p>“Man, you look awful,” Beau added, mercifully trying to deflect the attention from me.</p><p>Tyler, however, wouldn’t be deterred. “How did you get out of the way so fast? One second you were right there and then...”</p><p>Second verse, same as the first. “Edward pushed me out of the way.”</p><p>“Edward? As in, Edythe’s brother, Edward? Huh.” He frowned, the movement making some of the shallow cuts now exposed across his cheeks and forehead weep small drops of crimson. “I didn’t see him. It all happened so fast, I guess.”</p><p>“Super fast,” Beau agreed.</p><p>“He’s here somewhere,” I added, thinking of how Edward had strolled almost casually into the building under his own power. “They didn’t strap him down, though.”</p><p>They came to take me away for x-rays then, and Beau waited with his friend, giving me a much-needed moment to myself. I knew I wasn’t crazy; something about both Beau and Tyler’s reactions to hearing the story Edward had fed me made me even more certain that I was right. But then, what I thought I had seen made absolutely no sense. I grappled with the conundrum while the machine whirred over my head.</p><p>I had been right about my injuries. Barely more than a bad bump, not even a concussion. I wanted to leave, but the nurse said I had to talk to a doctor first, and Beau was stubborn in his insistence that I wait. He redeemed himself by keeping Tyler distracted. Unchecked, I could tell that the other boy would have spewed a near constant stream of apologies and promises to make it right. Even with Beau running interference, he got plenty out. I closed my eyes in an effort to ignore him.</p><p>“Is she asleep?”</p><p>My eyes pinged open at the sound of Edward’s smooth voice. He was stood at the end of my bed, his lips twisted into a smirk.</p><p>“Edward, dude, I’m so sorry,” Tyler started, but was effectively halted by Edward’s raised hand. I wished I could do that.</p><p>“No blood, no foul,” he said with an amused flash of brilliant white teeth. Beau made a strange choking noise but shook his head at my raised eyebrow.</p><p>Edward perched on the edge of my bed by my feet. “What’s the verdict?” He was talking to my brother instead of me, which irked me.</p><p>“There’s absolutely nothing wrong with me,” I insisted before Beau could answer. “but they won’t let me go.”</p><p>“Give it a minute, Bell,” Beau said, not for the first time.</p><p>I ignored him, focused on the infuriating boy facing me. “How come you aren’t trapped on a gurney like the rest of us?”</p><p>“It’s all about who you know,” he said, flashing his teeth again. “But don’t worry, I came to spring you.”</p><p>Then a doctor came around the corner and my jaw dropped. That was becoming an irritating pattern.</p><p>She was young, blonde and completely gorgeous. She looked like a doctor on one of those hospital dramas, where everyone is too pretty to be real and people kept sneaking off for clandestine trysts in on-call rooms. There was the air of an ingénue about her, old school Hollywood glamour wrapped in a pristine white lab coat. The perfection of her face was slightly – just slightly – offset by her pale skin and the dark, tired circles under her eyes. This could only be the famous Dr Carine Cullen, Edward and Edythe’s adoptive mother.</p><p>She smiled warmly at Beau and patted Edward lovingly on the shoulder, but she was all business, focused on me.</p><p>“Bella, it’s lovely to meet you at last,” she said, that same musical quality to her calm voice. “How are you feeling?”</p><p>“Fine,” I sighed, hoping this would be the last time I had to say it.</p><p>“Your x-rays look good.” She had them up on a light board, examining them carefully. “Does your head hurt? Edward said you hit it pretty hard.”</p><p>I glared at her son behind her back. He smiled angelically and my traitor brother tittered behind his hand. I swung my fist at him, but he dodged it.</p><p>“It’s okay,” I insisted, deciding to throw a bone of truth to make him feel bad about laughing. “It was throbbing a bit back at school, but that’s stopped now.”</p><p>My words backfired; Dr Cullen frowned in concern and began probing gently around the edges of my hairline, her cold fingers just barely pressing into my scalp. She found the spot behind my ear and smiled just slightly when I winced.</p><p>“Tender?” she asked.</p><p>I shrugged, projecting nonchalance. “Not really.”</p><p>She felt around a little more, then pulled away and scribbled on my chart before signing it with a flourish.</p><p>“Take two Tylenol for the pain and come back if you feel dizzy or sick,” she instructed firmly. “Sounds to me like you had a very lucky break.”</p><p>“Lucky Edward happened to be standing next to me,” I added, my own subtle probe.</p><p>“Yes, quite so,” she hummed, turning away from me to study Tyler’s chart. “I’m afraid you’re going to have to stay with us just a little longer.”</p><p>“She can go?” Beau asked, sounding hopeful and concerned all at once.</p><p>The doctor smiled at him knowingly. “Yes, you’re both free to go. Your father is in the waiting room ready to take you home.”</p><p>“Can’t I go back to school?” The last thing I needed today was Charlie hovering.</p><p>“Bell, take a break,” said Beau, exasperated now. “One day off won’t kill you.”</p><p>I ignored him, glaring determinedly at Edward. “Does <em>he </em>get to go back to school?”</p><p>His answering smile was serene. “Someone has to spread the good news that we survived.”</p><p>I scowled at that, then swung my legs off the bed and got up, swaying slightly. Beau steadied me and began leading me to the exit. It didn’t particularly surprise me that he knew his way around the ER. If he was at all like me (and he was) he had to have spent a fair bit of time here over the years.</p><p>“See you this weekend, Carine,” he called to the doctor, totally chill again now that I was out of danger. She waved absentmindedly, her focus on tending to Tyler.</p><p>Edward was already striding away from us, and I hurried to catch up, ignoring my brother’s half-hearted protests.</p><p>“Can I speak with you a moment?” I said, cutting my eyes at Beau. “Alone.”</p><p>Edward studied me for a moment, perhaps considering blowing me off. Beau patted my shoulder.</p><p>“I get it, I’m not wanted,” he teased. “I’ll hang out near the doors out of Charlie-sight, find me when you’re ready.”</p><p>He loped off, his long legs carrying him out of sight in moments. Edward gestured to a convenient empty hallway nearby.</p><p>“You really shouldn’t keep your family waiting,” he chided, his eyes turned hard and cold. It was such a sudden departure from the almost jovial mood he had been in a minute before. He was making jokes, at my expense, but still jokes. Now he looked like I thoroughly annoyed him, and he wanted nothing to do with me. I reeled internally, feeling something I could only describe as emotional whiplash.</p><p>“What do you want?” he prompted angrily when I didn’t speak.</p><p>“You owe me an explanation,” I reminded him weakly.</p><p>He drew himself up to his full height and somehow loomed over me while keeping a distance of several feet between us. If he was trying to be intimidating, it was working.</p><p>“I saved your life,” he said, flippant, dismissive, like the act – or perhaps the life – in question didn’t matter to him. “I don’t owe you anything.”</p><p>I seethed. “Why are you acting like this? Why am I lying for you, to my brother and your mother and anyone else who asks? What <em>happened</em> in that parking lot?”</p><p>“What do you think happened?” he snapped, his heated glare beginning to twist into a nasty sneer. I didn’t like that at all.</p><p>It was going to sound insane said out loud; I held on to my anger to strengthen the conviction in my voice. “I know you weren’t anywhere near me before it all started. Don't-" I cut him off with a raised finger when he opened his mouth to argue, “-tell me I hit my head too hard, because there is nothing wrong with it, and Tyler didn’t see you either. His car was going to crush us both, but it didn’t, you stopped it. You left a dent in the side, and in the other car where you leaned on it. The van was going to crush my legs, but you held it up and got me out of the way. And you don’t even have a scratch on you.” I trailed off, running out of steam.</p><p>His eyes were incredulous, exactly the sort of look that should be levelled on someone coming out with that kind of story. But that tension in his shoulders that I had observed on and off through Biology yesterday was back, making me think that I couldn’t be entirely wrong. When he spoke, though, his voice dripped with sarcasm and derision. “You think I lifted a van off you?”</p><p>I could only nod.</p><p>The sneer grew more pronounced. “No one is going to believe you.” Of this, he was supremely confident.</p><p>“I’m not going to tell anyone,” I insisted, irrationally insulted.</p><p>That cracked the facade, just a smidge. The sneer slipped and there was surprise in his eyes. “Then why does it matter?” Frustration, exasperation. For as inscrutable as he had seemed at first, I felt I was getting a good understanding of Edward Cullen’s mercurial moods.</p><p>“I don’t like to lie. Like I said yesterday, I’m not good at it. So there had better be a good reason why I’m doing it, and I would like to know that reason, please.”</p><p>It felt wrong to demand, but I didn’t want to beg, so I settled for making the ‘please’ as terse and irritated as possible.</p><p>“Can’t you just thank me and move on?”</p><p>“Thank you,” I bit out between my teeth, then waited.</p><p>He sighed. “You aren’t going to let this go, are you?”</p><p>“Nope.”</p><p>“Then I hope you enjoy disappointment,” he said with finality. He swivelled on the spot and walked away swiftly, effectively ending the conversation. Yet I somehow couldn’t let him have the last word this way.</p><p>“Why did you bother?” I called after him. “If you were going to be like this about it, why say you’d tell me? Why save me at all?”</p><p>He turned back slowly, and the sadness suddenly painted across his face threw me.</p><p>“I don’t know,” he said, just barely loud enough for me to hear. Then he turned and kept walking.</p><p>I stood there for a moment, regaining my composure before I went to find my brother. He looked concerned when I caught up to him – had Edward passed him? Had he overheard any of our conversation? For all I knew, the hallways echoed and the whole hospital had heard us.</p><p>“You okay?” Beau asked. I could only nod stiffly in response.</p><p>“Good, because it looks like half the school is in the waiting room.”</p><p>Horrified, I peeked through the window in the exit door and saw he was right; the space outside was full of teenagers. They were milling around in bunches, peering curiously at the doors. No doubt many were just here as an excuse to ditch, but I spotted our group of friends, Edythe standing slightly apart from them, near the front. Angela at least seemed to be genuinely worried, but the looks on McKayla and Jeremy’s faces were a little too eager for my liking. I groaned.</p><p>“I’ll head off the really curious ones,” Beau muttered, like we were planning some kind of assault. “You get to Charlie and get out of here while they’re distracted. I’ll hitch a ride back to school and give you a full gossip report later.”</p><p>I couldn’t help smiling at the conspiratorial tone in his voice. It reminded me of The Great Dessert Heist of ’98, when we’d staked out our grandmother’s kitchen with dreams of getting an extra helping of her famous chocolate Yule log. She’d caught us, of course, but the planning part had been fun.</p><p>“Sounds good,” I murmured back. “And remember, if anyone asks, I’m fine and Tyler’s a mess.”</p><p>“And Edward pulled you out of the way.”</p><p>I glanced sideways at him; even coming out of his mouth, it sounded wrong, but I had to agree. I’d said I wouldn’t tell anyone. “Exactly.”</p><p>“Break on three?” He held his hand out, palm down. I rolled my eyes but laid my hand on top of his.</p><p>“One, two, three, break!” we chanted, and pushed open the door.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 4: Invitations</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Bella gets a lot of unwanted invitation...</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Charlie was predictability frantic but calmed down as soon as I told him Carine had seen me and pronounced me well. His faith in her seemed to be absolute. Nevertheless, I let him support me out of the exit doors while Beau deftly intercepted our friends. I might have been seeing things, but it seemed like Edythe was shooting stern looks at anyone else who tried to get close. Something about the Cullens made most people avoid them at the best of times, I could only imagine the impact of one of them trying to ward someone off. Actually, I didn’t have to imagine it – I’d been on the receiving end of such looks from Edward enough times now to know.</p><p>We drove home, and I had to get on the phone and reassure my mother that I was alright; to my horror, Charlie had told her what happened. When she was finally suitably mollified, Charlie insisted I go straight to bed. Even though I assured him once again that I didn’t have a concussion, he stayed home and checked on me every few hours, scolding me if I was doing anything more strenuous than reading a book. It was frustrating to say the least. He kept wanting to do something for me, so I asked for the pain meds the doctor had recommended and some food around lunch time. He brought me the pills with a big glass of water and a slightly lopsided sandwich, and the frustration ebbed in favour of a surge of gratitude. He was really trying hard. I remembered the flap Renée had been in on the phone, the same way she would always get whenever I was sick. Charlie’s helpless parent panic was subtler, quieter, but no less impactful. I could picture him hovering over Beau in the grips of some childhood flu or stomach bug, desperately trying to find something useful to do. I thanked him for the sandwich with a kiss on the cheek that made him go red and retreat very quickly.</p><p>Around three, I had the sudden wild thought that the truck might not make it home, but I needn’t have worried; it roared into the driveway right on time.</p><p>“Barely a scratch, just needs new taillights,” Beau reported when I asked after the beast. “Maybe could do with a paint touch-up, but I don’t think there’s much point, honestly. Tyler’s van is totalled, his parents aren’t going to be happy.”</p><p>“What about the other car, the beige one we parked next to?” I asked, hoping I wasn’t being too obvious. “I think it got a little dinged up.”</p><p>He shrugged. “Looked fine to me. And I told everyone the story to spread, should’ve pretty well disseminated by tomorrow morning.”</p><p>“It’s not a story, it’s what happened,” I insisted.</p><p>“Sure, of course.” He sounded like he totally bought it now, unlike earlier in the ambulance. “Still, be prepared. A lot of people are going to be looking for a first-hand account.”</p><p>And so they were. Everywhere I went on Wednesday, there were curious looks and eager, probing questions. Mercifully, it didn’t take many repetitions of the same story for people to get bored and stop asking. McKayla and Jeremy in particular seemed very disappointed that there weren’t more details to be had. Almost everyone I spoke to said they hadn’t even seen Edward there until the van was pulled away, but few of them questioned it too deeply. Clearly, I was the only one so embarrassingly aware of the infuriating boy to have noticed his sudden change of location.</p><p>Another mercy was that Edythe finally warmed up to me. When she came to say good morning, she spared Beau only the briefest of kisses before sliding her arm through mine. My brother made some spluttery, incoherent noises of protest, but she hushed him firmly and started talking to me as she all but dragged me across campus.</p><p>“How are you feeling?” was her first question, sincere concern her foremost emotion.</p><p>“Fine,” I replied, trying not to seem too taken aback by her abrupt about-face. “Nothing hurts anymore. Tell your mother thank you, the Tylenol really helped.”</p><p>Edythe fairly beamed at that, and the sight was breath-taking. “Oh, she'll be so glad, I’ll be sure to pass that along. She said you might have a bit of a goose egg behind your ear, but...” She studied the fall of my hair carefully. “You can’t tell at all.”</p><p>I smiled, patting my hair self-consciously. I’d found the lump in question that morning, but I hadn’t even thought of it being visible. “Thanks, good to know.”</p><p>She took full control of the conversation then, regaling me with an account of the reaction to the accident at her house, the fussing over Edward, particularly from their father, Earnest. I told her about Charlie, and we laughed together at the silliness of overprotective dads. According to Edythe, once it was established that her brother was perfectly fine, the mood had switched to annoyance that Carine had had a chance to meet me while the others remained strangers. That surprised me a little; the kids, at least, could come and talk to me whenever they wanted. I decided not to say so though, because honestly, Edythe’s brother and sisters made me nervous. I had briefly caught a glimpse of the other four Cullen siblings as they loaded me up yesterday. Unlike my brother, they hadn’t charged forward to see if Edward was okay, and my passing glance over their expressions had revealed more anger and disapproval than concern. Alice had maybe looked a little worried, but at me, not her sibling. Rosalie’s glare had been absolutely murderous.</p><p>Edythe walked with us all the way to English, though Beau hinted more than once that it was the wrong direction for her first class. He trailed behind the two of us, sulking over his sudden abandonment. Edythe indulged him with a firmer kiss at the classroom door – drawing more than a few stares – while I went inside, shaking my head at them.</p><p>By contrast to Edythe’s sudden friendly mood, her brother seemed to have decided to ignore my very existence. I greeted him in Biology with self-assurance and calm, knowing I had done exactly what he asked of me all day.</p><p>“Good afternoon, Edward.”</p><p>His only response was a curt nod. He wouldn’t make eye contact and continued to sit at the extreme far end of the table. He acted like I wasn’t even there. We had no further contact that class, or any other time for the rest of the week... or the next week. I glanced at him from time to time across the cafeteria, watched him walking between buildings or across the parking lot – he turned out to be the mysterious driver of the Volvo – but he never looked at me. His golden eyes steadily darkened toward black, then turned honey-coloured, then darkened again. Piqued, I tried to show him no more attention than he showed me, all while wishing Mr Banner would set another lab so he would be forced to talk to me. It was miserable.</p><p>A month passed in just the same way. Tyler continued to be a nightmare, constantly pestering me for ways to make things right. I came right out and told him that all I wanted was for him to forget about it, and Beau tried to warn him off several times, but he wouldn’t let it go, tracking me down between classes and always trying to sit by me at lunch. Logan seemed weirdly annoyed by his attention, though I couldn’t fathom why. Edythe proved to be the most effective ward against him, and she took to waiting for me at the cafeteria door so that we were always well into a conversation by the time we sat down. She would then monopolise my attention for the whole hour, so Tyler didn’t have a chance to get a word in. The two of us continued to get to know each other, finding we had a lot more in common than we realised. We had a lot of mutual favourite books, movies and music, and similar opinions about things like manners and double standards. She even began spending the weekends at our house rather than whisking Beau away to hers, and often the three of us would hang out together. Beau joked that she was practically dating both of us and got a couch cushion to the head for his trouble. I also realised, as my comfort grew and I found I could observe her more easily, that Edythe had exactly the same strange golden eyes as her brother, darkening and lightening in almost exactly the same pattern. This similarity, so specific, a trait so bizarre in one and so completely beyond unlikely in two, confused me more than almost anything else about their odd family. I began wondering if all of them were somehow the same that way, as they were in so many others, but I was never close enough to Alice, Jasper, Eleanor or Rosalie to be able to tell.</p><p>Much to my frustration, the time was also marked with repeated dreams staring Edward. In them, it was always very dark. Edward, several yards away from me, observed me through cold, black eyes, then turned and walked away, leaving me alone in the blackness. I ran and shouted, but I couldn’t catch up with him and he never turned back around. Time and time again, the frantic need to reach him woke me in the middle of the night, anxious and twitchy and unable to sleep for a long time. I was back to being tired most days, which sucked. This, coupled with my own irrational irritation with my unconscious mind, led me to lash out, at my brother in particular. He took it in stride and gave as good as he got, but Charlie had to break up more than one fight at the dinner table and finally threatened to ground us both if we didn’t quit it. That had made me cry, which neither of the boys knew how to deal with. Something of my dour mood must have shown through in my emails to Renée, or perhaps Beau or Charlie or both were feeding her their own version of events. She called often, always expressing concern, offering to go back home if that was what I needed. I reassured her as best I could, and put concerted effort into regulating my behaviour, only allowing myself to fall apart in the privacy of my room.</p><p>On the school front, the Spring Dance was on the horizon and it was all that many people could talk about from the moment the first posters went up. The girls were particularly excited; the Spring Dance was traditionally a girl’s choice dance, and there seemed to be a lot of ladies looking for the perfect opportunity to make a move on their current crush. To all our surprise, Erica was the first girl in our group to bag a date, securing a yes from one Silas Bergman, a sophomore she knew from Debate Team. Jeremy was eyeing McKayla, hoping she would ask him but never able to catch her alone to give her the opportunity, much to his frustration. Even Angela seemed to have a boy in mind, though she was cagey about who and insisted that it would never work. The other boys were grumbling about having to wait to be asked by a girl. I privately thought Logan seemed to object to the idea of going anywhere with any girl, ever, while Tyler watched me with an expectant air that I did not like at all. Edythe and Beau observed the whole procedure with somewhat wistful expressions and somehow became even more gooey, no doubt basking in memories of their own first date. They had decided not to go, which surprised me at first.</p><p>“Dances aren’t really our thing,” Beau said when I asked. “I’m sure I don’t need to tell you what fresh hell results from me trying to dance.”</p><p>I did understand and made suitably sympathetic noises. Edythe giggled.</p><p>“You do look ever so dashing in a tux, my love,” she said, stroking his cheek lovingly and smoothing down the front of his flannel shirt like it was the lapel of a suit jacket. “And I know you loved me in that dress.”</p><p>“Well, yeah, duh,” my brother stammered, turning bright red.</p><p>She smouldered at him for a moment longer before releasing him and turning to me. “The dance was really just the excuse I needed to chivvy him along a little.”</p><p>“You knew he liked you,” I said with a grin, not even having to ask. I could just picture 15-year-old Beau, utterly unable to hide his fascination with this beautiful girl. I felt just a twinge of irritation at the realisation that 17-year-old me probably wasn’t doing much better with her brother.</p><p>Edythe laughed softly. “Oh yes, I knew. My siblings thought I was completely insane, asking out a total stranger like that. But who could resist this cute face?”</p><p>She squeezed Beau’s chin lightly. He made a horrendous face at her, crossing his eyes, scrunching up his nose and poking his tongue out of the side of his mouth. We both laughed at him, she kissed his cheek and he pinged back to normal, grinning widely.</p><p>“And the rest, as they say, is history,” he finished, touching his forehead to hers. I smiled. Now that I knew Edythe better and had had a real chance to see them interact, I found I felt the same about my brother’s relationship as I did my mother’s. I knew I should be dismissive of such intense young love – goodness knows Renée had raised me to be – but there was a sense of permanence to the way Beau and Edythe were together which made me think that theirs might be the one in a million high school sweethearts story that actually went the distance. Now, if we could only get Charlie settled, I mused as I walked to Biology; everything about our house made me painfully aware that he had never gotten over Renée.</p><p>McKayla had taken to perching on the edge of my lab table before class started, perhaps taking heart from the fact that Edward ignored her as thoroughly as he ignored me. Following my lead, she blanked him in return, chattering about everything and nothing until Mr Banner called us to order. She was more disappointed than I was about the aborted snowball fight – it didn’t snow again – but was now looking ahead to a beach trip that she was trying to organise, which only needed a break in the rain to go ahead. The day Beau announced he wasn’t going to the dance, however, she was focused on the same subject.</p><p>“So,” she said, a teasing glint in her eye. “Who are <em>you</em> planning to ask to the dance?”</p><p>I baulked. “No one. I’m not going.”</p><p>That seemed to surprise her, though I couldn’t fathom why. She’d seen me in Gym, after all. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Edward’s head tilt just slightly towards us, like he was listening too.</p><p>“Really? Oh.” She was thoughtful for a moment, then smiled conspiratorially again. “Jeremy will be disappointed. He definitely wants you to ask him.”</p><p>I laughed. “Are you kidding? Kay, he obviously wants <em>you </em>to ask him.”</p><p>She blinked a few times. “You think?”</p><p>“I know,” I assured her. “He’s been flirting with you for at least as long as I’ve known you both.”</p><p>She was frowning a little now. “Jeremy. Huh.”</p><p>“You should ask him,” I prompted. “Sooner rather than later. It’s really not nice to keep stringing the poor boy along.”</p><p>I made my tone teasing so she would know I wasn’t telling her off. She smiled and I could practically see the gears turning in her head.</p><p>“You know, I think I will. Thanks for the heads up, Bella.”</p><p>“No problem. Now we just have to figure out who Angela wants to ask.”</p><p>“Ha! Good luck with that.” She gave me a searching look. “You’re really not going?”</p><p>“I don’t dance,” I insisted, making a face. “Coordination and I are not good friends.”</p><p>“Oh, right,” she cringed, no doubt remembering my various PE disasters. “But you could still come, you know. We could make it a group thing, I’m sure all the boys would dance with you if you asked, and they wouldn’t make it a big deal if you trod on their toes or something.”</p><p>I shook my head firmly. “Sorry. Besides, I’m going to Seattle that weekend, I’m in desperate need of a decent bookstore.” The plan was concocted on the spot, a convenient excuse that I hoped she would pass on to anyone else who asked, but I quickly decided that a trip to the big city wasn’t actually a bad idea.</p><p>“Your loss, I guess,” she said with a shrug. “Enjoy yourself.”</p><p>She hopped off the desk then and crossed to her own seat as Mr Banner called the class together.</p><p>Perhaps out of habit, perhaps prompted by some sixth sense, I glanced sideways at my partner. To my intense surprise, he was looking at me. His black eyes were full of frustration again, and though I returned the stare he didn’t look away. He seemed to be searching for something in my eyes.</p><p>“What?” I hissed.</p><p>He shook his head. “Nothing.”</p><p>I huffed and focused stubbornly on the teacher, who helpfully called on Edward for an answer, though I’d managed to miss the question. I tried hard to stamp down the surge of emotion that I felt, purely from him acknowledging me for the first time in nearly six weeks. My knee bounced for a good five minutes before I finally calmed down. When class ended, I stacked my books, expecting him to race away as usual. He didn’t.</p><p>“Bella,” he said, his voice wrapping around my name in a way that I shouldn’t like as much as I did.</p><p>I raised an eyebrow at him, inviting him to say whatever he wanted to say, but he was silent.</p><p>“Are you talking to me again?” I prompted.</p><p>“Not really,” he replied, half-smiling now. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, resisting the urge to swing my books at his stupid, perfect, confusing, distracting face.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” he went on, in defiance of his own pronouncement. “I’m being unconscionably rude, I know. But it’s better this way, trust me.”</p><p>I frowned. “I don’t understand.”</p><p>“It’s better if we’re not friends.”</p><p>Well, that was one I’d heard before. I refused to acknowledge how much more hurtful the words were coming from this beautiful boy compared to, say, Chrissy Jones uninviting me to her sleepover in 4<sup>th</sup> grade.</p><p>“Maybe you should have figured that out earlier,” I snapped, turning my sour mood firmly onto him. “Saved yourself all this regret.”</p><p>He went from serious to perplexed in the blink of an eye. “Regret? For what?”</p><p>“For saving me. You should have just let Tyler hit me, then you wouldn’t have to deal with me anymore.”</p><p>His mood shifted again, changeable as ever. Now it was somewhere between aghast and angry. “You honestly think I regret saving your life?”</p><p>“You obviously do,” I shot back, hating the sadness creeping into my tone.</p><p>He let out the strangest hissing sound, with just the barest hint of a growl low in his throat. “You don’t know what you’re talking about, Bella.”</p><p>Just like that, I was done. Done with this conversation, done with his condescending attitude, done with <em>him </em>altogether.</p><p>“Whatever, Edward.” I swept my books into my arms and stalked toward the door. My dramatic exit was spoiled when my toe caught the lip of the door frame and I stumbled, dropping my pile loudly. I half-considered leaving them there, but of course that was stupid. But by the time I stooped to collect them, they were already gone, gathered back into a pile and politely offered by Edward’s white hands. I snatched them rudely and continued marching away from him, feeling the heat of his stare on the back of my head the whole time.</p><p>I caught a break in Gym; we were moving on to basketball, and it was Coach Clapp’s habit to spend a session explaining rules and doing demonstrations before letting us loose on a new sport. Beau and I were very deliberately not called on to help with any examples.</p><p>The downside was that I had plenty of time to stew, so my ire had not entirely cooled by the end of the hour. Beau trailed behind me as I stalked towards the truck, his customary goodbye with Edythe cut short by my perfunctory, “Let’s go.” I knew I should feel bad, and I did, but I was just a little bit more angry than repentant and not quite able to face the kind, lovely girl who never failed to remind me of her endlessly frustrating sibling.</p><p>“You okay?” my brother asked nervously once we were safely ensconced in the cab, me behind the wheel. I just shook my head, seethed and pulled out of the spot.</p><p>Only to have to slam on the brakes when Edward’s Volvo swung out into the lane and idled in front of us. I could see from here that his siblings weren’t in the car yet; they were still crossing the parking lot, Edythe looking disapprovingly in his direction.</p><p>“For crying out loud!” I fumed, rounding on my helpless brother. “What the hell is his problem?”</p><p>Beau looked a little scared. “I don’t know, <em>you</em> pissed him off somehow.”</p><p>I growled and revved the engine, the ever-present grumble surging into a deafening roar. I would just clip his bumper, that wouldn’t hurt him. Just take a chunk out of that shiny silver paint job.</p><p>Beau must have seen in my eyes where my mind was headed. “Don’t do it, Bell,” he warned. I ignored him and revved again.</p><p>A tap on my window made us both jump. Tyler was stood there, smiling idiotically. I wrestled the window down far enough to talk to him.</p><p>“Sorry, Tyler, we’re stuck behind Cullen.” I griped.</p><p>“I know,” he said cheerfully, not even seeming to care that a line was rapidly forming behind his new used Sentra. “But I thought, since we’re trapped here, I might as well come and ask you something.”</p><p>My stomach dropped. I had a pretty good idea what was coming.</p><p>“Will you ask me to go to the Spring Dance with you?” Tyler went on, oblivious to my mood.</p><p>“I’m not going to be in town, Tyler,” I replied sharply, willing Beau to really be telepathic and not question my lovely little excuse. He was mercifully silent.</p><p>“Yeah, that’s what McKayla said,” Tyler admitted.</p><p>“Then why-”</p><p>He shrugged. “I thought maybe she made it up, to stop any other guys from pestering you, you know. Some kind of weird girl solidarity thing.”</p><p>I ground my teeth and refrained from pointing out that he was the only boy pestering me with any regularity.</p><p>“I'm sorry, Tyler,” I said stiffly, not meaning it in the slightest. “I really am going out of town.”</p><p>His breezy mood was unaffected. “No worries, we still have Prom.”</p><p>Before I could say a word, he strode off back to his car. I gaped after him.</p><p>“Yeah, you’re gonna wanna nip that in the bud,” Beau mused from the other side of the cab. “That’s his ‘I mean business’ voice. Chances are he’ll show up on our doorstep come Prom night, even if you don’t say another word to him between now and then.”</p><p>I made an angry, frustrated noise somewhere between a growl and a scream and dropped my head to the steering wheel. The horn honked loudly, and I jolted back upright in time to see Alice and Jasper slide into the back seat of the Volvo. In the next space over, still parked, the three older girls were also getting into Edythe’s car, and Rosalie was glaring from driver to driver as if she couldn’t decide who she was angrier at. I could just see Edward’s eyes watching me in his rear-view mirror; they were crinkled around the edges and his shoulders were shaking. The ass was laughing at me. I leaned on the horn again, deliberately this time, but the sound barely started blaring before the Volvo shot off out of the lot and into the street. In the time it took me to gather myself and get back in gear, Edythe had calmly pulled out and followed him.</p><p>If I’d had any hope that my twin would let me seethe in silence as we drove home, it didn’t last long.</p><p>“When did you get to be such an angry person?” he asked, aiming for casual and missing by a mile. “Seriously, what happened to my sweet, gentle little sister?”</p><p>“Two minutes,” I snapped, annoyed with myself that even now I couldn’t control that reflex. “And Edward Cullen happened. He’s completely infuriating! ‘It’s better if we’re not friends,’ what the hell does that even mean?”</p><p>I’d muttered the last part to myself, not expecting him to hear, but he had.</p><p>“He actually said that to you?” He sounded troubled.</p><p>I nodded tightly. “Then basically called me an idiot because I pointed out something which is obviously true. All after being a complete tool at the hospital and ignoring me ever since...” I gripped the steering wheel, the material creaking slightly, and willed away the angry tears threatening to form. “Makes me want to kill him.”</p><p>“Hey now!” Beau held out his hands placatingly. “Don’t say that while I’m here. I want plausible deniability when they start pressing charges.” He sat up straighter, goofing around now, one hand in the air as if taking an oath. “‘No, Your Honour, I had no idea my sister would try to run down my girlfriend’s brother outside the Thriftway. History of violent outbursts? That’s news to me, sir.’”</p><p>Somehow, the sheer stupidity of his actions broke through my pulsing rage and I laughed. He grinned, latching on to my amusement and coming up with mock denials to ever more elaborate attempted murder schemes the whole way home. I did notice that in no scenario did I apparently succeed in ridding myself of the boy-menace, and I figured that was his way of reprimanding me. I’d calmed down by the time I parked up on the kerb, leaving the driveway for Charlie as usual. Still, I knew spending too much time thinking about Edward would put me back in a bad mood, so I strove to distract myself with the complex preparation of chicken enchiladas. It didn’t completely work; I was too practiced with chopping and slicing and monitoring the state of the frying pan to have to devote all my attention to my tasks. But I did my best, and I at least managed to hold the new ‘Angel of Vengeance' side of my personality in check for the rest of the evening.</p><p>Charlie looked suspicious when he caught the smell of green peppers. I had noticed that Beau’s cooking tended toward comfort food, old favourites that he knew our dad would like, probably because they reflected a lot of the diner fare that I remembered being the staples of our vacation time diets. I was more varied in my influences, and it showed in what I made. I preened ever so slightly when Charlie’s apprehension vanished after the first bite.</p><p>“This is really good, Bells,” he enthused in a very un-Charlie-ish way.</p><p>“Agreed,” Beau said, equally as enthusiastic. “Reminds me of that restaurant in Phoenix that Mom took us to that one time, do you remember? She called it ‘the good Mexican place.’”</p><p>I smiled. “Gabriel’s, I remember. We used to go there all the time.” What I’d made wasn’t nearly as good as that, but I still felt a surge of pride that I was getting the boys to trust my cooking. I mentally catalogued a few more world food options to trial in the coming weeks.</p><p>“Hey, Dad,” I ventured when he was almost done. “I just wanted to let you know, I’m heading to Seattle, a week on Saturday. If that’s okay.” I didn’t like the precedent that asking permission set, but I felt rude, so I tacked on the last sentence to soften it slightly.</p><p>Charlie frowned. “Why?” Like he couldn’t imagine anything Forks couldn’t provide.</p><p>“Mainly I want to find a good bookstore,” I said with a shrug. “And I could use some more warm weather clothes. It’s colder here than I was expecting.” I realised belatedly that my source of transportation might not be available. “I can have the truck, right, Beau?”</p><p>Beau nodded easily, munching happily. “Fine by me, I have plans with Edythe. She won’t mind picking me up.”</p><p>The furrow in Charlie’s brow deepened. “You aren’t going with her, Beau? Seattle is a big city, she could get lost.”</p><p>“Phoenix is bigger,” I pointed out, not about to be treated like some helpless damsel in my own home. “And I can read a map.”</p><p>“Bella can take care of herself, Dad,” Beau reassured him, grinning at me in a way that showed he was thinking about my aggressive attitude this afternoon. “You’ll want to watch the gas tank though, the truck’s mileage is awful.”</p><p>I’d considered that. “I have a bit of extra money saved up, I’ll stop whenever I have to.”</p><p>Charlie was convinced at last and moved on to the next concern. “Will you be back in time for the dance?”</p><p>Of course, everyone in town knew the schedule of dances at the high school. “No, Dad, I’m not going.”</p><p>There was a teasing glint in my father’s eye, but a twinge of worry too. “No one ask you?”</p><p>“It’s girl’s choice, Dad,” Beau reminded him.</p><p>“Oh, right. Well, no one caught your eye then?”</p><p>“Dad,” I whined, not wanting to touch that one. There was, of course, one boy who had caught much more than my eye, but I was refusing to think about him.</p><p>“Alright, alright, I get it,” Charlie surrendered, letting the subject drop.</p><p>The next day, I wanted to park as far from the Cullens as I could. Avoidance, beyond what was absolutely necessary, seemed like the best course of action if we wanted to keep from playing out one of Beau’s courtroom scenarios. But it was my brother’s turn to drive, and he parked right by Edythe’s white Impala, as he did whenever possible. The silver Volvo was on the other side.</p><p>Edythe was waiting by the front of her car and danced up to Beau at once. She seemed to be in an especially good mood this morning, eager to pull him away towards the school buildings. Edythe tended to be a more reserved sort of girl; I'd always noticed the air of maturity, poise and all-round refinement that she emanated. She often seemed a lot older than eighteen and wasn’t generally one to bounce or get over-excited, but this morning she was practically hovering. I trailed behind her and my brother, contemplating what on earth could have put her in such high spirits.</p><p>“Good morning.”</p><p>The voice beside me was gentle, not loud or especially startling in and of itself, but it was so sudden that I jumped half a foot and instinctively clutched at my chest. Out of nowhere, Edward was walking beside me, an amused smile at my reaction already spreading across his lips. I glared.</p><p>“What, are you trying to give me a heart attack now?”</p><p>That brought the smirk out in full force, coupled with the intense burn of his now light golden eyes. “That would we rather counterproductive, don’t you think? After the effort I’ve already expended to keep it beating.”</p><p>“Could have fooled me,” I griped, my eyes stubbornly forward as I continued marching towards English. “Apparently pretending I don’t exist didn’t work so you’ve decided to irritate me to death.”</p><p>Edward sighed heavily. “Bella, you are being absurd. I’m not trying to cause your demise by any means.”</p><p>I wasn’t sure if I was imagining the very slight hesitation before he said the word ‘demise’, almost as if he didn’t like it. I turned my head just slightly to look at him, and there was sad twist to his eyes, though the lopsided smile was still firmly in place.</p><p>“The traffic jam last night?” I reminded him.</p><p>He chuckled. “That was for Tyler’s benefit, not mine. I’ve noticed you can be a little… unobservant at times, and I had to give the poor boy a chance.”</p><p>“You…” Infuriating, insufferable, exasperating, obnoxious, aggravating… The string of adjectives refused to resolve at an appropriately awful noun, so all the words stayed trapped behind a wall of sheer fury. I felt the urge to hit him and put on a surge of speed, trying to give myself the distance I so desperately needed.</p><p>“Wait!” He wasn’t having it, his long legs catching up and keeping pace with me easily. “I’m sorry, that was rude. Not untrue,” he qualified, “but rude of me to say, nonetheless.”</p><p>“Please just leave me alone,” I said, praying again that I wouldn’t start crying.</p><p>“Can I ask you something first? I did have a purpose in walking with you this morning, but you side-tracked me.”</p><p>I huffed. “Fine. You have 30 seconds.”</p><p>“I was wondering if, a week from Saturday – you know, the day of the Spring Dance –”</p><p>I whirled on him, furious. “Are you <em>kidding </em>me?”</p><p>“I still have 20 seconds,” he reminded me, too calm for my liking.</p><p>I made a curt ‘get on with it’ gesture.</p><p>“I wondered if you wanted a ride for that trip to Seattle.”</p><p>That brought me up short. Until yesterday, this boy had barely even given me the time of day. Now he was volunteering to spend an eight hour round trip with me in the enclosed space of his car.</p><p>“Why?” I asked, every bit of my confusion in my voice.</p><p>He shrugged. “I’ve been planning my own trip to the city, and I’ve seen that truck in action, I’m not sure it will make it there and back.”</p><p>I started heading for class again, wiping away the rain that had dripped onto my face from looking up at him. “The truck will be just fine, thank you very much.”</p><p>“But can it get all the way to Seattle and back on just one tank of gas?” he pressed, keeping up with me again.</p><p>“None of your business,” I grumped, well aware I was being juvenile.</p><p>“We all have a responsibility to preserve our planet’s finite resources,” he said, eminently reasonable. “I’m just trying to do my part.”</p><p>“I don’t understand you, Edward,” I sighed, hating the thrill that skittered up my spine just from saying his name. “I know we should at least try to get along, for Beau and Edythe’s sake, but I thought you didn’t want to be friends.”</p><p>“I said it would be better if we weren’t friends, not that I didn’t want to be.”</p><p>“Because that makes complete sense.” My words dripped sarcasm. I stopped walking and looked up at him; we were under the overhang of the cafeteria roof now, so I could do it without getting my face wet. Unfortunately, <em>his</em> face was so completely distracting that I was in danger of losing my train of thought completely.</p><p>“It would be more… prudent for you not to be my friend,” he elaborated, not clearing my confusion at all. “But as you say, our siblings have ensured that we are going to be in each other’s lives for the foreseeable future. And if I’m being honest, I’m tired of trying to stay away from you, Bella.”</p><p>For what felt like the first time since I’d met him, Edward’s expression was pure honesty. His voice was low, and the look in his eyes was akin to the smouldering gaze that his sister gave my brother at their most intensely romantic. That was ludicrous, of course – the idea that anything like <em>that</em> could happen between Edward and I. But still, I couldn’t quite catch my breath as our eyes held.</p><p>“Will you let me take you to Seattle?” he murmured, his tone gentle yet demanding a response.</p><p>My throat had gone dry and I could only nod.</p><p>He smiled very slightly, then his face went serious again.</p><p>“You really ought to stay away from me,” he warned. “I’ll see you later.”</p><p>Then he pivoted on his heel and walked away into the rain.</p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 5: Blood Type</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Edward continues to be inexplicably attentive, and Biology goes awry for Bella.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I was in such a daze when I arrived in English, I didn’t register that Ms Mason was already taking attendance. Beau had to yank me down into my seat beside him and pinch me when she called my name a second time in a disparaging tone. I flushed as our classmates tittered.</p><p>“What did Edward want?” Beau asked in a whisper as she continued down the list.</p><p>I glanced around to make sure no one was listening. “He heard I’m going to Seattle and he wants to drive me.”</p><p>His eyes widened. “Seriously? What did you say?”</p><p>“I said yes.” Technically, I hadn’t <em>said </em>anything, but he didn’t need that much detail.</p><p>“Why?” He sounded as perplexed as I felt.</p><p>“I don’t know. Have you ever tried arguing with him when he gets all…” I searched for the word. “Intense?”</p><p>“Can’t say I’ve ever seen that. Are you really going to go with him?” He seemed concerned now, and I couldn’t understand that at all.</p><p>I shrugged. “I don’t know, maybe. What was Edythe in such a good mood about?” Hello, Deflection, my old friend.</p><p>Before Beau could answer, Ms Mason’s voice cut across the classroom. “Mr and Miss Swan, since you both seem to have so much to say this morning, can one of you tell us what literary device is most prominent in the passage on the board?”</p><p>Blushing again, I sat up straighter and cast my eyes across the projection. It wasn’t hard to identify.</p><p>“Pathetic fallacy.” I said… at exactly the same time as Beau.</p><p>The classroom erupted with laughter; even Ms Mason was fighting a smile as she tried to regain order.</p><p>“I did say just one of you, but at least you’re both paying attention. Now, <em>Miss </em>Swan, can you explain what pathetic fallacy is?”</p><p>I was supremely confident. English was by far my best subject, and she wasn’t about to catch me out. “A form of personification which attributes human emotions to non-human objects. It’s most commonly used to refer to weather descriptions that reflect a character’s feelings or the tone of a scene.”</p><p>“Good.” Ms Mason seemed almost startled but recovered quickly. “And Mr Swan, what is the pathetic fallacy at work here?”</p><p>Beau did not hesitate. “There’s a thunderstorm, so the protagonist is probably feeling angry or worried. The fact that it’s off in the distance could also indicate a sense of impending doom.”</p><p>“Excellent, thank you both. Now, let’s get into our reading. Miss Newton, could you pick up from where we left off yesterday?”</p><p>The class went by without further incident, as did the rest of the morning. McKayla had taken my advice and asked Jeremy to the dance, and now both of them were riding high on excitement. Angela, Tyler and Logan were tagging along unattached, and the group was now plotting a way to get their parents to club together for a limo rental. McKayla was also buzzing about the weather report for the coming weekend, which was promising a break in the rain that would finally make the beach trip possible. As far as I knew, the whole group and then some had already promised they were going, including my brother and I. I was struggling to muster much enthusiasm for the idea; I vaguely remembered the pebbly expanse of First Beach, not at all what I considered beachy. They should have sand and sun and heat. Even if there was no rain, this weekend would still have the cold snap of early March in Washington.</p><p>My mind kept circling around the conversation in the parking lot. Part of me was genuinely worried that I’d hallucinated the whole thing and the next time I saw him I would be treated to the same indifference of the last month. I was a little surprised to find that that was the last thing I wanted. Even as he infuriated me, even with as much as I thought I was coming to hate him, I couldn’t deny the impact of his intense eyes, his hypnotising voice, the openness of his words. When he said he didn’t want to stay away from me… just remembering it made my heart skip a beat.</p><p>I was so distracted that I barely registered the walk to the cafeteria, and I caught only the gist of McKayla’s chatter as we joined the line. I did notice that Edythe hadn’t met us at the door as she usually did; when I checked our table, she was already sat beside Beau with her back to me. My stomach sank a step further when my eyes shifted without permission to the Cullens’ table and found only four figures seated there, the other bronze head conspicuously absent. A prickle of what I could only call worry danced across my skin, completely illogical and yet undeniable. I found myself wondering if he had gone home, if there was something wrong, and the thought almost… hurt. My appetite suddenly abandoning me, I bought a bottle of lemonade and prayed that my brother wouldn’t be too overbearing about it. At least not in front of Edythe.</p><p>“Edward Cullen is staring at you again,” Jeremy said, and from the first syllable my unfocused mind completely cleared. “I wonder why he’s sat by himself.”</p><p>I scanned the room again and sure enough, there he was, sat alone on a table against the back wall, as far from his family as he could get. He was waiting to catch my eye, and once he had, he beckoned me over with a crooked index finger. As if that weren’t unbelievable enough, he accompanied the gesture with a smile and a wink. I could feel that my mouth was hanging open.</p><p>“Does he mean <em>you</em>?” McKayla asked, sounding as dumbfounded as I felt – somehow it was a little insulting.</p><p>I pulled myself together and shrugged. “Maybe he needs help with his Biology homework. I’d better go see what he wants.”</p><p>I could feel their eyes on me as I walked towards him, and many more besides as people noticed where I was going. I did my best to ignore them, stopping at the chair opposite Edward.</p><p>“Will you sit with me today?” he asked gently, apparently sensing my hesitation.</p><p>I half-nodded and sat cautiously, trying to read his face. It was unreal, dreamlike in its beauty; I waited for darkness to descend around us, for him to turn cold and walk away. But nothing changed and he went on smiling, waiting for me to speak first.</p><p>“This is a bit of a change,” I ventured, twisting my soda bottle nervously between my hands.</p><p>“Well…” He paused, then finished in a rush. “I decided that as long as I’m going to hell, I might as well do it thoroughly.”</p><p>Apparently, he had decided to stop making sense today. Not that he was a paragon of logical behaviour at the best of times, but this was especially confusing.</p><p>“What is that supposed to mean?” I asked, a little afraid of the answer.</p><p>He just smiled, looking down at the table. “Just thinking out loud.” Then he looked up at me through his impossibly long eyelashes and abruptly changed the subject. “I think your friends may be angry with me for stealing you away.”</p><p>“Is that what you’re doing?”</p><p>The smile turned downright wicked. “Oh yes. And I may not give you back. What do you think of that?”</p><p>His golden eyes befuddled me, and I blurted out the truth. “I’m trying to understand why. What’s changed your mind about me?”</p><p>He gave that question a long moment of deep thought. “I can’t say exactly. I don’t think my mind has changed. I’ve just given up.”</p><p>“Given up?”</p><p>“Trying to be good,” he clarified. “Trying to stay away from you. I’ve decided simply to do as I please and take what consequences may come my way.” There was a touch of steel in his eyes as he finished, though his voice stayed casual.</p><p>I frowned and twisted off the cap of my lemonade. “There are consequences to being my friend? Like what?”</p><p>Edward shook his head, his smile turning wry. “I always say too much when I talk to you. It isn’t helping matters, and yet I can’t seem to stop.”</p><p>“I don’t understand any of it,” I assured him.</p><p>“That’s what I’m counting on.”</p><p>“So, just to be clear, we’re friends now?”</p><p>“Hmm… Friends…” He pursed his lips slightly, as if considering the word itself.</p><p>“Or not,” I mumbled, taking a swig of my drink. The sweet liquid settled somewhat unsteadily in my empty stomach.</p><p>He grinned again. “Well, I suppose we ought to try, if only for Edythe and Beau. But I’m really not a good friend for you.”</p><p>“So you’ve said. Many times.” I hated the way my shoulders slumped; he couldn’t miss how disappointed I looked, how obviously it mattered what he thought of me.</p><p>“I have to,” he insisted, a true warning in his tone. “It doesn’t seem to be sinking in. A smart person would want to be as far from me as possible.”</p><p>“Oh, so if I don’t run screaming, I’m not smart? That’s nice.”</p><p>“I’m sorry, that wasn’t what I meant to imply at all.” He was genuinely apologetic, and it overwhelmed me again. So it was the truth that came out once more when he asked, “What are you thinking?”</p><p>“I’m trying to work out what you are.”</p><p>He tensed, but otherwise maintained his serene expression. “Any theories?”</p><p>I felt my cheeks turn pink. I did have theories… ridiculous ones that belonged on the pages of Beau’s old comic books. No way was I telling him that.</p><p>“Tell me one?” he pressed when I didn’t answer.</p><p>I just shook my head furiously.</p><p>He sighed. “That is really very frustrating, you know.”</p><p>My eyes narrowed. “Frustrating, really? Wow, I can’t imagine what that would be like. For someone not to tell you every little thing they’re thinking, all the while making cryptic remarks that make absolutely no sense and seem like they’re designed to keep you up at night trying to unravel what they could possibly mean. Nope, no idea what that feels like.”</p><p>He grimaced – I’d hit a nerve.</p><p>I was also on a roll. “Not to mention, if that person also did a wide variety of bizarre things, apparently hating you on sight, then being perfectly cordial, then saving your life in a completely impossible way, then acting like you’re invisible, and never explaining any of it, even the parts he promised to. Not frustrating <em>at all</em>.”</p><p>“You have quite the temper, don’t you?”</p><p>“I don’t like hypocrites. Or double standards.”</p><p>Our eyes locked, and we stared each other down, as if daring the other to break. Surprisingly, it was him; his eyes suddenly cut to something over my shoulder, and he smirked.</p><p>“Your brother seems to think I’m being unpleasant to you – he’s debating whether to swoop in and enact a rescue.”</p><p>I squared my shoulders. “Beau knows I can take care of myself.”</p><p>“Yes, he does,” he agreed. “But he’s also your brother, and he hates to see you upset. I’m afraid I’ve become particularly irksome to him over the last few weeks.”</p><p>I couldn’t help glancing over my shoulder at Beau. He wasn’t even looking at us, though plenty of people were. His head was bent low toward Edythe, locked in some private conversation with her.</p><p>“You can really tell all of that?” I asked sceptically.</p><p>“Yes. I told you, most people are easy to read.”</p><p>“But not me.”</p><p>“No, not you.” He was especially thoughtful. “I wonder why.”</p><p>I took another swig of lemonade to get away from his intense eyes.</p><p>“Aren’t you hungry?” he asked abruptly.</p><p>I didn’t mention that my stomach was too knotted for any kind of food; even the lemonade was almost too much. “Not today. What about you?” The table in front of him was empty.</p><p>“No, I’m not hungry.” That made him smile, like I’d told a joke but only he understood it.</p><p>There was something I wanted to ask, a request that had been formulating in the back of my mind, but I wasn’t sure if we were at the point where I could voice it without making him angry, or sad. Deciding I would never know if I didn’t try, I said, “So, as my friend, could you do something for me?”</p><p>“Like what?” He frowned, guarded.</p><p>“It’s just a little thing,” I assured him, though to me it really wasn’t.</p><p>He gestured for me to proceed.</p><p>“Can you tell me when you next plan on ignoring me for my own good? At least give me some warning, so I’m prepared?”</p><p>He smiled, looking like he wanted to laugh. “I think I can manage that.”</p><p>“Thank you.”</p><p>“And may I have just one thing in return?”</p><p>“Just one.”</p><p>“Tell me one of your theories.”</p><p>Damn, he was crafty. “No way.”</p><p>“You promised one answer,” he pointed out. “It’s only fair.”</p><p>I narrowed my eyes at him. “Hardly. You’ve broken promises to me. Besides,” I looked down, turning pink again. “You’ll laugh.”</p><p>“I won’t,” he said softly, and when I glanced up his golden eyes were intent and his expression gently pleading. Then he chuckled slightly to himself. “I was going to say I promise, but I understand that from me, that may not be enough. So I swear, I will not laugh.”</p><p>I was locked into his gaze, unable to look away even if I wanted to. My mind went completely blank and I had to blink a few times. He saw the effect he was having and doubled down, leaning toward me, still open and earnest.</p><p>“Please tell me just one theory,” he murmured, and his voice had the impact of a truth serum.</p><p>“Uh… Refugee from a distant alien planet?”</p><p>His soft smile abruptly switched to a smirk. “You think I’m Superman?”</p><p>My face blazed red; I shrank back into my jacket and picked up my bag, standing to leave. “You said you wouldn’t laugh.”</p><p>“I’m not laughing,” he insisted, making an obvious effort to rearrange his features and reaching out one hand, though he didn’t touch me. “Please, don’t go.”</p><p>I settled back in my seat, but kept my bag on my lap, my arm through the strap as I reached for my drink again.</p><p>“I’m sorry for upsetting you,” Edward said softly as I took another swig. He looked down at his hands, at the cap from my drink that I hadn’t noticed him steal. “It was just the thought of me as a superhero… nothing could be further from the truth.”</p><p>I tilted my head to the side, an unexpected wave of sadness washing over me as I realised, he genuinely believed that. “You think you’re the bad guy?”</p><p>His smile was sad too. “You don’t?”</p><p>I thought hard about my answer, sensing that it was very important that I word it just right. I considered everything he’d told me, everything he’d implied, and everything I’d seen of him in the last few months. My heart sped slightly as a few things fell into place in my brain.</p><p>“I think… I think you could be dangerous,” I began hesitantly. “And maybe kind of frightening, if you wanted to be.”</p><p>He nodded, and his expression was almost resigned, as if he knew that was what I would say. There was something in his eyes that I couldn’t quite identify, though.</p><p>“But you aren’t bad,” I finished softly, just as certain of this as I was of the danger. “No, I don’t think you could ever really be bad.”</p><p>“You’re wrong.” He was certain of that. He stared at the bottle cap as he span it on the tabletop and the silence stretched between us. A part of me wanted to argue with him, but as I looked away to give myself some clarity of thought without the distraction of his perfect face, I realised that most of the cafeteria was empty. I jumped up, scanning the room; his siblings were gone, as were most of my friends, though I could see Beau almost at the door, turning around to look back at me.</p><p>“We have to go, we’re going to be late for Biology,” I said, swinging my bag onto my shoulder and downing the last of my drink.</p><p>Edward kept spinning the bottle cap. “You go, I’m ditching today.”</p><p>“Why?” I asked, a little startled. I knew the Cullens sometimes skipped school, but that was usually when the weather was nice and their parents made plans, at least according to Beau. They’d never struck me as the type to randomly ditch.</p><p>But Edward shrugged and said, “It’s healthy every now and then.”</p><p>I hesitated, part of me really, <em>really </em>wanting to ditch too. But the bell rang, and I was too much of a goody-two-shoes to break the rules.</p><p>“I guess I’ll see you later then,” I said quickly and hurried away. When I glanced back, he waved, but didn’t make any other move.</p><p>I managed to avoid my brother, who was heading in the opposite direction to me. The thin herd of students were all either half-running to get to class on time or strolling casually, not caring to be late; I was firmly in the first category. I arrived last of my class, but somehow before Mr Banner, and as I got settled, I could feel more than one curious gaze on me. I was far too distracted with playing the past hour over in my head – I had so many new questions.</p><p>Then Mr Banner came in, immediately calling us to order as he put four cardboard boxes down on McKayla’s desk at the front.</p><p>“A little something different today, guys,” he started, looking pleased with himself. “The Red Cross are having a blood drive next weekend in Port Angeles, and I thought it would helpful for you all to know your blood type, should you be moved to donate. Those who aren’t eighteen yet will need parental permission, I have slips on my desk if you want one. Now, here’s how it works, and please pay attention, we’re working with sharps today.”</p><p>My stomach flipped as soon as the word ‘blood’ left his mouth. Beau had had enough incidents over the years to be formally excused from this kind of activity, but clearly no one had thought to tell them about me. As Mr Banner gave instructions and demonstrated what to do on McKayla, I tried to fight back the nausea to no avail; my forehead beaded with sweat, my stomach rolled, and sound dulled as a ringing started in my ears. When he held up McKayla’s bloodied indicator card, black spots bloomed in my vision and I had to put my head down on my desk. I heard the sounds of my classmates beginning their work as if through water and concentrated on taking deep breathes through my mouth.</p><p>“Bella, are you alright?” came Mr Banner’s startled voice form somewhere above my head.</p><p>“I already know my blood type, Mr Banner,” I said weakly without lifting my head, afraid of what I would see and desperately wishing I’d taken the chance to ditch when it was presented to me.</p><p>“Do you feel faint?”</p><p>“Yes, sir.”</p><p>“Can someone please take Bella over to the nurse?” he called to the class at large, and I dimly heard Angela’s soft voice volunteer. She even packed my stuff and put my bag on her shoulder before gently helping me out of my seat. The surge of gratitude I felt was not quite enough to overwhelm the dizziness, but it was enough to get me out of that godforsaken classroom.</p><p>Angela led me gently across campus toward the main office. As soon as I thought we were out of sight of building four, I stopped my slow shuffle. “Can I sit down for a minute?”</p><p>“Of course, here.” She helped me sit on the damp grass beside the path. “Don’t worry, I didn’t stick my finger yet.”</p><p>“Thank you,” I breathed, slumping over on my side and laying my head on the wet greenery. The cold finally seemed to make a dent in the spinning, as did closing my eyes.</p><p>“Bella, you’ve gone all pale.” Angela sounded a little panicked. “Should I go get someone?”</p><p>Before I could answer, another voice called my name from a distance, and I screwed my eyes shut. Please, no, not him. Anyone but him.</p><p>But the next moment, Edward’s voice rang out again, much closer. “Is she alright? Is she hurt?” He sounded as worried as Angela.</p><p>“I… I don’t know,” she stuttered, clearly flustered. “We’re blood typing, but she didn’t even prick herself, just put her head down and went limp. I was taking her to the nurse, and she wanted to stop and now...”</p><p>“Bella, can you hear me?” His voice was much closer now, maybe half a foot from my ear.</p><p>“Go ‘way,” I groaned by way of reply.</p><p>He sighed, just a touch of a laugh to the sound.</p><p>“Should I go get the nurse?” Angela asked.</p><p>“No, I’ll take her the rest of the way. You can go back to class.”</p><p>Part of me really wanted Angela to argue with him. Of all the people I did not want to see me in this state, Edward was right at the top of the list. Maybe slightly behind Beau or my parents, but not by much. Unfortunately, Angela was either far too accommodating or far too overwhelmed by Edward or both; I heard her hand over my bag and offer her hope that I would feel better soon. Then the ground abruptly disappeared from beneath me. My eyes flew open to find that Edward was carrying me in his arms, as easily as if I weighed no more than my backpack, which was hanging over his shoulder.</p><p>I couldn’t contain a groan as the motion of his walk caused me to sway in his arms, and I was suddenly profoundly grateful that I had nothing substantial in my stomach. Perhaps I would manage not to throw up all over him. Still, I closed my eyes and squeezed my lips shut.</p><p>“So, you aren’t fond of blood, I take it,” Edward said conversationally, sounding amused for some reason that I didn’t have the brain-space to figure out right now.</p><p>“Put me down,” I moaned weakly, reaching out to push against his chest. It was very firm under my hand; that skinny build was disguising some serious muscle. I also realised that as securely I was held against that chest, there was a fraction of an inch of space between us.</p><p>He didn’t answer and then we were somehow inside, though I had no idea how he had opened the door while holding me like this. I heard Mr Cope make a startled noise.</p><p>“She’s just a little faint,” Edward reassured him.</p><p>I cracked my eyes open enough to watch Mr Cope hurry around the counter to open the door to the nurse’s office. Edward carried me in – cue more startled noises from the nurse, who had been sat at her desk reading a novel – and laid me out on the cot. Then he quickly retreated to the far corner of the room.</p><p>“They’re blood typing in Biology,” he explained. “She felt faint, then got halfway here and passed out.”</p><p>“I did not pass out,” I argued, but there was no strength in the words.</p><p>The nurse came to look me over and her expression quickly turned knowing. “You wouldn’t happen to be Beau Swan’s sister, would you?”</p><p>I nodded.</p><p>“This happens to you a lot, too?”</p><p>“Yes ma’am.”</p><p>She smiled kindly. “Then I’ll just grab you a cold compress and you can wait here for it to pass.” She eyed Edward as she turned to go. “You can head back to class, hon.”</p><p>“I’m supposed to stay with her,” he said with such confidence that even I half-believed it. I was reminded of Edythe telling us that her brother was ill – exactly the same tone.</p><p>The nurse bustled off to get what she needed, leaving us alone. I closed my eyes and put my arm over them, trying to block out the fluorescent lights above me.</p><p>“You were right,” I mumbled.</p><p>“Generally,” he said, without hesitation or modesty. “But did you have something specific in mind?”</p><p>“Ditching <em>is </em>healthy,” I admitted, doing my best to breathe evenly.</p><p>He chuckled softly, and then there was a moment of silence before he spoke. “You had me worried for a moment there. Poor Angela looked utterly terrified.”</p><p>I cringed guiltily. “I’ll have to find a way to make it up to her. She’s a really good friend.”</p><p>“She is a very kind person,” he agreed, sounding thoughtful.</p><p>A thought had occurred to me too. “So where did you come from? Weren’t you ditching?”</p><p>“I still have to ferry my siblings home. I was just in the parking lot, listening to some music in my car.”</p><p>Before I could come up with a suitable response to that surprisingly banal statement, I heard the click of the door opening. I moved my arm and cracked my eyes open to watch the nurse return and lay the cold pack across my forehead. The cold chased away the last of the spinning and finally put a solid dent in the ringing and nausea.</p><p>“There now. You’re looking a lot better already, dear.”</p><p>“I think I’m okay, actually,” I said, sitting up. She looked like she wanted to make me lie back down, and I thought I saw Edward twitch towards me slightly too. But the door opened again and Mr Cope's head appeared.</p><p>“We’ve got another one,” he warned, and held the door open to reveal McKayla staggering under the weight of Lee Stephens, a boy from our Biology class now sporting a distinctly sallow face. I quickly hopped off the cot and backed against the wall beside Edward to let them by.</p><p>“Oh no,” he muttered suddenly. “Bella, go back into the office, quickly.”</p><p>I caught the smell before I could ask and ducked through the open door as it swung closed, unnervingly aware of Edward following me out. When I turned back to him, he was startled.</p><p>“You listened to me.”</p><p>“I smelled the blood,” I said, my nose scrunching. Lee had definitely got his turn with a lancet, and I knew McKayla had been bleeding.</p><p>Edward frowned. “People can’t smell blood.”</p><p>I shrugged. “I can. Beau too, we both get sick from it. It’s like rust and salt, you know, harsh and coppery.”</p><p>He stared at me with an expression I couldn’t quantify</p><p>“What?” I asked.</p><p>“Nothing. I knew blood made Beau feel unwell, but I suppose I just wasn’t expecting that would be the source of the issue. Or that you both would suffer from it.”</p><p>I smiled, a little disbelieving myself. “Well that’s a first. Usually people hear ‘twins' and assume we’re clones or something.”</p><p>Before he could reply, the infirmary door opened again and McKayla came out. She glanced between the two of us speculatively, a note of excited nervousness in her look at Edward.</p><p>“You’re looking better, Bella,” she commented, tilting her head slightly toward Edward with a meaningful eyebrow raise.</p><p>I nodded, feeling a little uncomfortable. “I am. Just keep your hand in your pocket, if you don’t mind.”</p><p>“It’s not bleeding anymore,” she assured me. “Are you coming back to class?”</p><p>I winced. “There’s no point, is there? I’d have to come right back.”</p><p>“Right, duh.” I definitely couldn’t miss the implication of the look she gave us now; in her eyes, I probably didn’t need an excuse to ditch if it meant spending time with Edward. “Are you guys still coming to the beach this weekend, or is Beau busy with Edythe?”</p><p>“No, we’re both going to be there,” I reassured her. “I think Edythe has plans with her sisters.” I glanced at Edward for confirmation and he nodded very slightly.</p><p>“Cool.” She smiled, then more nervously added, “Did you want to come along, Edward? We’re meeting at my parents’ store at ten on Saturday.”</p><p>To my surprise, Edward looked a little interested. “Where exactly are you all headed?”</p><p>“First Beach, down at La Push,” I chimed in. I found a part of me really wanted him to say yes, which was disorienting – less than 24 hours ago I had been planning his death and now I wanted to spend the day with him.</p><p>But I was quickly disappointed; his face went somewhat blank and he shook his head. “I’m afraid I can’t. I’ve just remembered, Jasper and I are hiking the Goat Rocks Wilderness with our dad this weekend while the girls go shopping. We’re actually heading out tomorrow.”</p><p>“That’s too bad,” I said, and meant it, weirdly. Although I did wonder how he could have forgotten a plan that had him missing an entire day of school.</p><p>McKayla was frowning just a little. “Goat Rocks... isn’t that south of Mount Rainier? I’ve heard my dad warning people away from that area, there’s a lot of bear activity up there.”</p><p>“We know our way around.” Edward was supremely confident. “We’ll be fine. But thank you for your concern, McKayla.”</p><p>He smiled at her, and she very visibly swooned.</p><p>“Um... well... okay then. Have fun, I guess. See you in Gym, Bella.”</p><p>She made her way to the door, a little unsteadily, but still managed to turn back and give me one more significant look. I knew there would be questions when I saw her again.</p><p>“Gym,” I moaned, suddenly realising that this hellish afternoon wasn’t over yet.</p><p>“I have a plan,” Edward murmured reassuringly, suddenly right by my ear. “Just sit down over there and look pallid.”</p><p>Not difficult; I wasn’t quite fully recovered yet and that, on top of my naturally pale skin, was sure to have me looking wan and weak. I crossed to the wobbly chairs against the wall, trying to drag my feet just a little without tripping. Once I was sat down, I tipped my head back against the wall, genuinely tired from the whole ordeal.</p><p>With my eyes closed, I heard Edward get Mr Cope's attention and ask him to excuse me from Gym.</p><p>“I’ll make sure she gets home,” he insisted. “And I’ll make sure her brother knows what’s going on.”</p><p>“Alright, if you’re sure,” Mr Cope said, not sounding completely convinced. “Do you need to be excused too?”</p><p>“I have Mr Goff, he won’t mind. Eleanor’s in that class too, so she can catch me up on anything I miss.”</p><p>“Okay, all taken care of. You feel better, Bella.”</p><p>I nodded weakly and stood up, trying to make it look like a struggle. Edward looked amused.</p><p>“Do you need carrying again?”</p><p>“I can walk,” I assured him, and proved it by leading the way out. He caught the door just as I started to heave it open, doing most of the work and holding it for me. I turned my face up into the fine mist of moisture in the air, for once enjoying the freshness as the last of the sweat on my forehead washed away.</p><p>“Thanks. This whole thing was almost worth it to miss Gym,” I said.</p><p>“Glad to be of service,” he replied, smiling just slightly. “Although perhaps next time we can come up with something less dramatic, hm?”</p><p>I shrugged. “I guess. Can I have my bag back?”</p><p>He handed it over, though he looked almost reluctant to do so. “I hope you enjoy your beach day this weekend. I’m sure you’ve been missing the sun.”</p><p>“I have,” I agreed, then bit my lip and added nervously. “I don’t suppose you could rearrange that hiking trip and come along too? You’d definitely be welcome.”</p><p>His smile tightened and he shook his head. “I really can’t, Earnest and Jasper have been waiting for some guy time for far too long. But thank you for the invitation.”</p><p>The casual words clashed with the deliberate, formal way he said them. ‘Guy time’ for Beau and Charlie meant a fishing trip or watching baseball games on the flatscreen. I couldn’t imagine Edward and his brother doing anything so ordinary. They were too otherworldly.</p><p>“Maybe another time then,” I conceded. “You enjoy yourself.”</p><p>We had been walking and talking and were now near the parking lot. I turned to head for the truck; Beau had the keys, but we only locked it overnight – no one in their right mind would try to steal it – and I could at least sit in the cab and get ahead on my homework while I waited for him. A tug on the back of my jacket brought me to a halt.</p><p>Edward was glaring at me again, angry, a fistful of my coat in his hand. “Where are you going?”</p><p>I frowned, confused. “Um… I was going to go sit in the truck.”</p><p>“I said I would take you home,” he insisted. “You don’t need to wait for Beau.”</p><p>“It’s only an hour, I’ll manage. Besides, he’ll worry about where I’ve gone.”</p><p>“I’ll let Edythe know and she’ll tell him.” He started pulling me along towards his car, shifting his grip to the strap of my backpack that was hanging loose. I stumbled but just about kept my footing, the image of a caveman dragging his conquered mate back to a cave by her hair flashing through my mind. My opinion of him, which had been drifting in a positive direction, circled back around to irritated.</p><p>“You have serious control issues, you know,” I griped as he let go of me at the passenger door of the Volvo.</p><p>“It’s open. Get in,” was his only response as he climbed into the driver’s seat.</p><p>I contemplated making a run for it, then decided that was a bad idea. He would probably just catch me, if I didn’t fall over first. I climbed in stiffly as he started the car, fiddling with the heating and music. I fastened my seatbelt.</p><p>“You really don’t need to do this,” I tried again. He didn’t respond, instead pulling his phone out of his pocket and tapping rapidly at the keys. Before I could comment on his rudeness, he turned the screen to face me, revealing a text chain to Edythe that mainly consisted of times, places and other unintelligible shorthand. The last message was more detailed.</p><p>
  <em>Bella sick. Not serious but taking her home. Tell Beau.</em>
</p><p>“Happy?” he asked.</p><p>“No,” I answered honestly. “But I guess it’ll have to do.”</p><p>He sighed but put the phone away and shifted into gear. We were out of the parking lot and on the road with neither of us saying another word. I was content to keep it that way, but then I recognised the music playing and couldn’t help myself.</p><p>“You listen to Debussy?”</p><p>He sounded equally surprised when he replied. “Yes. You know him?”</p><p>“A little. My mom likes classical music, Claire de Lune is one of my favourites.”</p><p>“Mine too.” That made him thoughtful.</p><p>I stared out of the window, watching the world go by much faster than I was used to. The car was deceptively smooth, difficult to tell its speed until you looked outside. The rain was starting to fall harder, the wipers swishing back and forth to keep the windscreen clear.</p><p>“Tell me about your mother,” Edward said out of nowhere.</p><p>I arched an eyebrow at him. “Don’t you already know?”</p><p>He shrugged. “Beau doesn’t talk about her much, and I’ve never been inclined to ask.”</p><p>“Of course not,” I muttered, shaking my head. I was beginning to think that Edward deliberately ignored everyone around him. Everyone but me, apparently. At least for today.</p><p>To his credit, he had the decency to look chagrined, and I decided I might as well indulge him.</p><p>“She looks a lot like me, but older of course, and prettier. She’s got blue eyes like Beau – or, I guess, his are like hers. He takes after her with his confidence too, they’re both braver than me. I’m a lot more like Charlie. Mom can be forgetful and a little irresponsible. Kind of eccentric and experimental. She’s my best friend.” I trailed off, suddenly sad.</p><p>The car stopped as he pulled over. When I glanced out of the window, I could see the vague shape of my house through the now driving rain. It had been a much shorter drive than I’d been anticipating. Edward looked frustrated.</p><p>“How old are you, Bella?”</p><p>“Seventeen,” I replied, confusion making it come out sounding almost like a question.</p><p>“You don’t seem it.” It was almost an accusation.</p><p>I laughed, and he tipped his head sideways curiously.</p><p>“My mom says I was born thirty-five and get more middle-aged every year.” I laughed again, then after a pause added, “You seem older than seventeen too.”</p><p>He sidestepped the comment and asked another question. “Why did she marry Phil?”</p><p>I had to think about that, not least because I was surprised that he’d remembered my step-dad’s name.</p><p>“Renee is… kind of young for her age, if that makes sense. I think Phil helps her feel even younger. And she loves him like crazy, of course.” I didn’t fully understand it, but I didn’t have to.</p><p>“You approve then?”</p><p>“Yes, not that it matters,” I arched an eyebrow at him, a little confused by the question. “He makes her happy, and that’s what I want for her.”</p><p>He was watching my face very carefully, as if trying his hardest to read something hidden there. “You talk like <em>you’re </em>the parent, not her.”</p><p>I shrugged. “I guess it feels like that sometimes. But I don’t mind. She is who she is.”</p><p>“You’re very good to her,” he mused. Then he smiled. “And what about your brother? Do you approve of his choice?”</p><p>I smiled back widely. “Oh yeah. Edythe’s great, and I’m not just saying that because you’re her brother. Honestly, I wasn’t sure what to expect, but now that I’ve met her, I can see the appeal.” I blushed, realising how my words could be interpreted. “Not in <em>that </em>way, I don’t have a crush on her or anything, I just mean I can see why he would like her so much.”</p><p>He was searching my face again. “Would they both do the same for you, I wonder? Accept your choice, no matter who it was?”</p><p>I shrugged. “I’ve never really dated, so I guess I don’t know. But I hope they’d be happy for me, if I was happy.”</p><p>He considered that thoughtfully.</p><p>“What about you?” I asked when the silence grew uncomfortable. “You know all about my family and I still feel like I don’t know much about yours.”</p><p>“What do you want to know?” he asked cautiously.</p><p>“Well, I know the Cullens adopted you guys. What happened to your birth parents?”</p><p>“They died a long time ago. I don’t remember them very clearly, and neither does Edythe. Carine and Earnest have been our parents for so long, it’s hard to remember a time before them.”</p><p>“You love them.” It wasn’t a question. His tone made it obvious.</p><p>“Yes,” he agreed, smiling. “They’re very good people.”</p><p>“What about the others? I think Beau told me your twins are fostered, but Eleanor and Alice?”</p><p>“My siblings are going to be quite perturbed if I leave them standing in this downpour or force them all to pile into my sister’s car,” he pointed out.</p><p>I felt bad to have kept him so long, but I really didn’t want to leave. “Wow, is it already 3:30?”</p><p>“Almost.”</p><p>“I guess I’ll see you on Monday, then,” I hedged, hoping but not expecting another lunch invitation. “Enjoy Goat Rocks.”</p><p>He smirked. “I’m sure I will. And you enjoy First Beach, but… could you do something for me?”</p><p>His eyes were burning again, and I could only nod.</p><p>“This will probably sound harsher than I mean it to, but you seem to be a little bit of an accident magnet. Will you please try not to get washed out to sea or anything like that?”</p><p>I couldn’t tell if I was annoyed because he assumed that was something I would do, or because it was actually very likely.</p><p>“Don’t worry,” I said a little snippily. “Beau will be there to keep an eye on me.”</p><p>“He’s not much better,” Edward commented wryly.</p><p>I huffed and got out of the car, slamming the door harder than necessary and marching up the walk. When I glanced back, I could just see him smiling as he pulled away.</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 6: Scary Stories</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>A trip to the beach bears unexpected fruit.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi guys, apologies for the lack of upload last week. Unfortunately, I reached the end of what I had pre-written a few weeks ago and with going back to work I just didn't have this chapter ready. Uploads may be more sporadic from now on, but I'm always plugging away and I have no desire or plans to abandon this story.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I sat in my room, trying to concentrate on the third act of <em>Macbeth </em>and not succeeding. The series of bizarre conversations – the morning, lunch and in the car – kept circling in my head and distracting me from the plight of medieval Scottish royalty. Eventually, I heard the truck roar into the driveway, the sound clear even through the pounding rain, then the slam of the door and my brother's heavy footsteps thumping up the stairs. He opened my door without knocking, a frantic look in his eyes.</p><p>"Rude!" I chastised, throwing my pillow at him. It thumped him in the face and hit the floor by his feet.</p><p>He bent to pick it up and looked calmer when he straightened. "You sure you're sick? You seem fine to me."</p><p>"I am fine," I assured him. "Mr Banner was blood typing today."</p><p>He knew exactly what I was talking about. "Ah, I see. You had a neurally mediated syncope due to your weak vasovagal system."</p><p>I rolled my eyes at him. "No, I smelled blood and I got dizzy. Big words only make people panic, you know."</p><p>"Big words get me out of those classes without a doctor's note," he pointed out, flopping onto my mattress heavily. "But really, you're okay? Edward was a little stingy on the details."</p><p>"I'm really fine," I reassured him. "I wanted to wait for you at school, but he insisted."</p><p>"He does that a lot with you," Beau mused. "And you keep giving in. What happened to running him over?"</p><p>I shrugged theatrically. "Oh, I'm still considering it. I feel like I'm on a rollercoaster with him, one minute homicidal, the next totally helpless."</p><p>"What did he want at lunch?" he probed.</p><p>"No clue, he never really got to the point. Something about not wanting to stay away from me anymore and taking whatever consequences came from it." I shook my head. "I swear, he makes less sense every day. Is he always like this?"</p><p>"Not usually," he admitted. "He's never sat with anyone besides his family though. Honestly, I think Edythe would still sit over there if I would go with her."</p><p>I'd wondered about that; as much as he cares about his friends, I'd gotten the distinct impression that Edythe trumped all of them. "Why don't you?"</p><p>He cringed. "They're… a lot, all at once. Don't get me wrong, I like them. But they don't all like me."</p><p>I frowned. "What do you mean?"</p><p>"It's not a big thing," he insisted, hurrying to backtrack and clearly feeling he'd said too much. "Eleanor and Alice are really nice. Edward's standoffish, but he's that way with everyone. Jasper avoids me a bit and Rosalie… just really doesn't like me for some reason. Edythe says there's nothing I can do about it and she'll come around eventually." He didn't look convinced.</p><p>I wrapped an arm around his shoulder and squeezed reassuringly. "Her loss. You're awesome."</p><p>"Hey now," he protested. "If you're not careful, people will start thinking we actually like each other."</p><p>I turned my hug into a shove. "Shut up, dork, you love me."</p><p>He rocked back into me, pushing me over a little. "I really do. I'm glad you're okay, sis."</p><p>I smiled. "Thanks. And I love you too."</p><p>The rest of the evening passed calmly. I'd been afraid that Charlie would somehow hear about my fainting spell, but he never mentioned it and neither did Beau.</p><p>Friday was no fun at all. Word of my fainting fit had got around at school, and everyone was still talking about my lunch with Edward. McKayla had a million questions, none of which I answered to her satisfaction. Worse still, she and Tyler both had free rein to pester me all through lunch, as I didn't have the buffer of Edythe to deter them. She was sat on the other side of the cafeteria with her sisters, deep in a very intense-looking conversation. Beau didn't look terribly happy about that either, but gallantly did his best to distract everyone with talk of the next day's beach trip. It worked, at least partly; McKayla got very excited talking about the weather report that was promising sun and temperatures as high as sixty degrees. I still wasn't convinced that <em>that </em>would materialise, but it was already feeling warmer.</p><p>Logan was looking sour again and he kept glaring at me. He was one of Beau's newer friends, although of course they'd known each other since kindergarten. I'd never really spent a lot of time with him, and I was struggling to understand why he didn't like me. My only clue was that he always seemed to get annoyed when Tyler paid me a lot of attention. I could only conclude that he had feelings for the other boy and was keeping them hidden for some reason. Then I remembered the way McKayla had talked about Eleanor and Rosalie, the way I'd heard a lot more people talk about them since I'd been here, and I thought perhaps Logan's secrecy wasn't so incomprehensible. I felt a pang of sympathy for him and redoubled my efforts to ignore Tyler.</p><p>Meanwhile, Edward's absence was almost palpable. I found myself glancing around the cafeteria as if he would suddenly materialise out of thin air, gesturing me over to an empty table again. I even half expected him to be waiting in Biology, but of course he wasn't. The hour seemed to drag even more without him.</p><p>Over dinner, Beau and I realised that neither of us had actually relayed our weekend plans to Charlie. Thankfully he wasn't mad, as he'd picked up another extra shift and had been feeling guilty about leaving us on our own again. He was as excited as any of the kids, though he did ask for all their names and offered a silent nod of approval when he heard them. I wondered idly if he would have approved of Edward in the mix, or our trip to Seattle. He didn't seem to dislike the Cullens, but I only really heard him talk about Carine's work most of the time. Nonetheless, I decided that Beau knowing who my ride was going to be was enough familial involvement in that particular endeavour.</p><p>I had planned to sleep in on Saturday, as I often did now that I didn't have quite so many household responsibilities on my plate. But that plan was scuppered by two factors.</p><p>The first was an almost foreign brightness worming its way through my eyelids. When I opened them, warm yellow sunlight beamed down through my window. I went to look, and sure enough, there was the sun. it wasn't the perfect cloudless blue of an average day in Phoenix, but there was a solid clear patch that promised a definitively sunny day. I stood there, soaking it in, practically feeling the vitamin D surging into my skin.</p><p>The second disturbance was my brother, hammering loudly on my door.</p><p>"Rise and shine, little sister," he yelled obnoxiously, though obviously excited. "When McKayla says ten, she really means 9:30."</p><p>"Two minutes," I hollered back, and wriggled the window open to get a feel for the temperature outside. It was a little stiff, but I managed to crack it enough to judge that a sweater might be a good idea, despite the sunshine. I dressed quickly, just in case Beau took my standard retort as a time check for getting ready.</p><p>When I got downstairs, my brother had already poured cereal for both of us, although he had been kind enough not to put milk on mine so it didn't get soggy. He was already eating, an enthusiasm about him that I had thought was reserved for Edythe.</p><p>"You're really looking forward to today, aren't you?" I said, an amused smile pulling at my lips.</p><p>He shrugged and swallowed his food. "I enjoy a sunny day as much as the next guy. And with Edythe busy, it's nice to have something else to do today."</p><p>"Did you ask her if she wanted to come?" I asked, trying to sound casual. "McKayla seemed happy for Edward to come along, and he's not even part of the group."</p><p>That surprised him, and I realised I hadn't told him that on Thursday. "I mean, I would have, but I knew she was busy. They always put family first."</p><p>I hummed noncommittally as I started to eat.</p><p>Newton's Olympic Outfitters was on the edge of town. I'd seen it before, and I had a vague memory of going in once with Charlie to get fishing supplies. The Newtons had moved from California when McKayla was nine, so they were a little newer to town than some other families.</p><p>This morning, their parking lot was crowded with teenagers. McKayla waved as we pulled in and I spotted Jeremy hovering near her. There was a cluster of girls, including Angela and Erica, and I could see Tyler just getting out of his Sentra. Logan was stood with a few other boys who I couldn't name off the top of my head. When we got out of the truck, Logan made a nasty face and muttered something to them. They laughed and high-fived him. Beau either didn't notice this or didn't care, because he just approached McKayla with a bright smile.</p><p>"We're just waiting on Sammie and Lee," she told us, fairly floating with excitement at having organised such a popular trip. "He's bringing his mom's minivan so there should be plenty of seats. You guys wanna ride in my car?"</p><p>"Sure," Beau agreed breezily</p><p>Jeremy came up and somewhat nervously put his arm around McKayla. "But I get shotgun, right?"</p><p>She rolled her eyes and smiled at him. "Duh."</p><p>That made him happy.</p><p>In the end, Lee brought two extra people and suddenly every seat was needed to accommodate our group of seventeen. Rather than overcrowd McKayla's Suburban, Beau and I opted to take the truck, turning the planned carpool into a full-on caravan. As we drove the fifteen miles to the coast, I watched the scenery with interest. I had always thought of Forks as being just a shade too green, like something from another planet, and I didn't particularly care for it. Now, with sun shining down through the canopy and casting odd green shadows across the road and the occasional glimpse of the river, it was no less alien, but I thought I could see what the appeal might be for my dad.</p><p>We wrestled the windows down and Beau turned on the old radio, tuning to an oldies station and singing along with gusto. He saw my arched eyebrow and correctly interpreted the question.</p><p>"Edythe likes old music," he said with a shrug. "I guess I picked up a few things."</p><p>We didn't talk much on the drive, content just to sit together. As we passed the first small houses of the reservation, Beau began pointing out where various people lived, saying names as if I should know who they were, but I didn't recognise any of them.</p><p>Finally, the familiar curve of First Beach came into view. Beau parked up in the small gravelly lot on the edge of the road and I quickly chambered out. It was as beautiful as I remembered from years of summer day-trips. The multi-hued stones stretched out for several hundred yards, making up most of the beach, before a thin strip of dark washed sand at the water's edge, constantly covered and uncovered by the grey and white wash of the waves. Salt-bleached trees littered the tide line, driftwood on a scale unmatched on any other beach I had ever been to.</p><p>Our group made a beeline for a cluster of logs a few hundred yards down the beach. There was a circle of stones there with evidence of past fires, and I thought perhaps it was a spot that at least some of them had visited before. Several kids immediately set about collecting smaller pieces of wood and building the beginnings of a new fire in the ashes. McKayla took charge, and my brother and I made the simultaneous decision to stay out of her way, sitting down on a log bench with Angela.</p><p>"Do we need a fire?" I wondered out loud. It was a little chilly with the wind coming off the ocean, and the clouds were threatening, but we were in a solid patch of sunshine and it was fairly warm.</p><p>"We always burn driftwood when we come to the beach," Angela said in her soft, gentle voice. "It's tradition."</p><p>Beau nodded. "Absolutely. Did we ever do fires when we came here as kids? I don't remember."</p><p>"I don't think so," I said.</p><p>He grinned. "You'll like this then."</p><p>The pyramid of wood was built, and Jeremy ceremoniously produced a lighter to get it burning. As the small flames licked up the wood and began to catch, they flickered blue and green instead of the standard red-orange.</p><p>"Wow," I breathed. "It's so pretty!"</p><p>"The salt makes the flames change colour," Beau explained. "Cool, right?"</p><p>"Very."</p><p>We sat and chatted amongst ourselves for a while, trading stories back and forth. I mainly listened, not having anything I particularly wanted to share, occasionally chipping in to one of Beau's tales. After a while, a few boys wanted to hike over to the tide pools. I wanted to join, but Edward's request that I not end up in the water echoed in my head. In the end, Logan made up my mind for me; he hadn't dressed for a hike and he wanted to stay put. As much as I thought I understood his sourness, that didn't mean I had to expose myself to it if I had another option. I stood up quietly to join the hiking group, and my brother came with me.</p><p>Reaching the pools meant a short walk through the forest, away from the beach. We lost a lot of the sun in the dense tree cover, and I was glad of my sweater. Beau seemed to be faring fine in just a short sleeved Mariners t-shirt, but I guessed that he was well accustomed to every shade of Forks temperatures by now. I went carefully, mindful of tripping over hidden roots or patches of uneven ground and fell a little behind, but my brother kept pace with me; solidarity or his own caution, I couldn't tell. At one point, the rest of the group got so far ahead that we couldn't see them anymore. I was about to suggest speeding up, but Beau spoke first.</p><p>"So... Edward."</p><p>I stiffened slightly but tried to sound uninterested when I replied. "What about him?"</p><p>Beau gave me a 'really?' look. "Come on, sis, don't play dumb. There's something going on between you two."</p><p>"No there isn't," I scoffed, while silently panicking. "Our siblings are dating, it makes sense that we should be friends. If anything, he's been making things more complicated for some unknown reason. Maybe he just finally realised what an ass he was being."</p><p>He hummed in agreement and I hoped he would drop it. But no such luck.</p><p>"You're not exactly consistent either, though. One minute you're planning homicide, the next he's driving you to Seattle, you're eating lunch alone with him, inviting him to come on this trip-"</p><p>I cut him off. "McKayla invited him."</p><p>He wasn't swayed. "But I bet you wouldn't have minded if he'd said yes."</p><p>I wanted to deny it, but the look on his face told me it would be a waste of time – he had me all figured out.</p><p>"Okay, so maybe he isn't as awful as his first impression might have suggested," I allowed. Beau looked oddly pleased by that admission, but I ploughed ahead before he could start crowing. "But that doesn't mean I know how I feel about him, alright? I'm still working on it. So I'd appreciate you keeping any rampant speculation to yourself."</p><p>He put a hand to his chest and looked affronted. "You wound me, sister. Of course, I shall keep your budding romance in the strictest confidence."</p><p>I was still laughing at that when we broke the tree line and found the tide pools, and our friends.</p><p>It was a beautiful little spot. The waves lapped at the edge of the rocks about ten yards away, the tide low and not threatening us. The pools it had left exposed were teeming with life: colourful corals, wafting anemones, flashes of small darting fish and the rainbow glimmer of shellfish in the sun. I picked my way across the rocks carefully, mindful of the slick surface and Edward's warnings. Though I was in no danger of toppling into the ocean, I had fallen in these pools enough as a child to be keeping my distance; it wasn't nearly warm enough for me to stand getting wet. Beau was more adventurous, jumping over pools with the other boys and narrowly avoiding a splash at least twice.</p><p>Eventually, enough people complained of being hungry that we decided to head back for lunch. I kept up with the group on the hike back, deliberately walking beside McKayla and letting her inane chatter wash over me. I wasn't in the mood to continue my conversation with Beau; it had made me think far too much about what truth there might be in his obvious implications. I genuinely wasn't sure how I really felt about Edward. After all, he did annoy me more often than not. However, I also couldn't deny that part of me was intrigued by him, desperate to figure out what exactly was up with him, and more than a little attracted to his sudden interest in me. But I also had to accept an irrefutable certainty – any thought of romance was out of the question. Whatever he was, it was so much more than me, so much more than I could ever hope to be. He was incredible, and I was painfully ordinary. Boys like him didn't chose girls like me.</p><p>Then again, girls like Edythe didn't chose boys like Beau either, so maybe anything was possible.</p><p>I was no more decided on how to proceed with the Cullen Problem by the time we got back to the beach. When we got there, the group had multiplied. Several other teenagers with coppery skin and black hair were clustered around the fire, making conversation with the remains of our group. We said our hellos and there was a round of introductions, but I didn't manage to fix a single name in my memory. Beau seemed to know several of them but was uncharacteristically cool, giving three burly boys at the back of the group a sharp nod. He was more himself when greeting a younger girl, maybe fourteen or fifteen years old, who he hugged tightly.</p><p>"Bells, you remember Jules, right? She's Bonnie Black's youngest."</p><p>I made an apologetic face. "Sorry, no. Although... Bonnie, maybe. Didn't she have the truck before us?"</p><p>The girl, Jules, nodded. "Yeah, the beast was ours. And you can thank yours truly for the engine refit." She grinned cheekily.</p><p>"Wow, really? Charlie said it was practically rebuilt from scratch."</p><p>Jules shrugged. "Yeah, it's a hobby of mine. I'm just glad your dad took it off our hands, Mom wouldn't let me work on my car while we still had a working vehicle."</p><p>Beau laughed. "Jules, you don't even have your permit yet."</p><p>"Says who?" she shot back. Their back and forth was comfortable, teasing and light-hearted, much the same as Beau and I. They were clearly close friends, like siblings, and I felt a weird pang of jealousy. With as close as Charlie and Bonnie were, they had probably spent a lot of time together growing up. She would have been like his little sister, doing a lot of the things that we should have done together. I could almost picture it in my mind, and my brain connected to a long lost memory of an afternoon at this very beach: Beau and I racing clumsily across the pebbles after two taller girls with long black braids, watched by a kind-eyed, copper-skinned man, a chubby toddler circling him as she collected interesting rocks. I abruptly recalled that Bonnie's husbands name was Saul; he'd passed away when we were about seven in a car accident. She also had two older daughters, Rachel and Rebecca, identical twins just two years older than us. As a chunk of the group took orders and set off for the little general store to buy lunch, I sat beside Jules on a log and asked after her sisters. To my surprise, Rebecca was married and living in Hawaii with a small child of her own, and Rachel was away at college and already on track to graduate early.</p><p>Food arrived and was rapidly consumed, as is often the way when teenage boys are involved. The conversation turned, as it so often did, to stories of exploits past, with the La Push kids offering some much needed new material. Someone had brought a little battery-powered stereo and started playing music. All in all, it was shaping up to be a very pleasant afternoon.</p><p>As the food ran out and people started to drift, splitting into smaller conversations or getting up to try skipping stones or collect more firewood, I saw Logan eyeing me. It gave me a distinct sinking sensation, and sure enough, a moment later he called to me across the fire.</p><p>"Hey Bella, Jordan and I were just saying what a shame it is that none of the Cullens could come along today. Didn't anyone think to invite them?"</p><p>Before I could say anything, one of the Quileute boys chimed in. "Do you mean Dr Carine Cullen's family?"</p><p>Logan looked annoyed at being thwarted, clearly wanting to get a reaction out of me, but turned with a falsely pleasant face. "Yes, do you know them?"</p><p>"The Cullens don't come here." The boy replied. His tone was so strange; not like they weren't inclined to come, or had no reason, but like they weren't allowed.</p><p>Jules fidgeted uncomfortably next to me, and when I glanced sideways I saw that she had a look on her face somewhere between embarrassment and shame. Weirdly, Beau also looked out of sorts, though he was more annoyed. We locked eyes over Jules; I raised an eyebrow in question, but he just shook his head. Then Jeremy proposed another trip to the tide pools and Beau got up quickly to join, like he was trying to escape the moment. I let him go. Something was going on here, and I had a feeling I was going to have an easier time unravelling it if I stayed put. I contemplated how to get what I needed, and as the hiking group set off once more with a few newcomers, inspiration struck.</p><p>I turned to Jules. "Want to come check in on the truck? I've got no idea what Beau's been doing with it for the last few months."</p><p>She nodded eagerly. "That sounds awesome, let's go."</p><p>I led her up to the parking lot and popped the hood on the truck. She went to work straight away, studying the various elements of the engine block with a clearly practised ease. She pulled a rag out of her back pocket to protect her hands as she poked about, but a streak of oil still found its way to her forearm. I waited for what I thought was the opportune moment, when she was happily distracted checking the oil level.</p><p>"So," I said, trying to sound casual and probably failing, as usual. "What was that about the Cullens?"</p><p>Jules froze minutely as she pulled out the dip stick, but kept going after a second. "You caught that, huh?"</p><p>I shrugged.</p><p>She shook her head. "Sam can be kind of... intense. Honestly, a lot of people around here are weird about that family, and my mom is leading the charge." She sighed. "She and Charlie had a massive fight about it when they moved here, because Mom was telling everyone on the res not to go to the hospital anymore. Kicked off again when your brother started dating one of them, I think Mom was trying to make Charlie stop them seeing each other."</p><p>That made me frown. "Why would she do all that? Does she think they're a bad influence or something?"</p><p>Jules' russet cheeks turned a shade darker. "It's really stupid, old superstitious stuff. And we're not really supposed to talk about it."</p><p>I leaned on the side of the truck, careful to avoid the oily engine and hoping I seemed extra interested. "Why not? If it's just superstition..."</p><p>She laughed without much amusement. "That depends on who you ask. My mom believes in it all absolutely."</p><p>"You can tell me," I insisted. "I won't rat you out to anyone."</p><p>She pursed her lips as she slammed down the hood, then she was smiling conspiratorially. "Okay, but you have to promise."</p><p>She held out her pinkie finger and I wrapped mine around it, grinning. "Promise."</p><p>"Okay," she started, hopping up on the hood and holding out a hand to help me up beside her. "First off, do you know any of our legends about where we came from? As in, our tribe?"</p><p>I shook my head.</p><p>"Well, there's an old story that says we are actually descended from wolves." She said the last word with weight, and I could tell she was a natural-born storyteller. "Legend has it, some of our ancestors had the ability to turn themselves into wolves in order to protect the tribe. I suppose you pale faces would call them werewolves." The cheeky grin reappeared; it was clear she didn't believe the stories herself.</p><p>I, on the other hand, was enthralled. "Who were they protecting against?"</p><p>"The werewolf's only natural enemy, of course. The demons who stalk the night, hungry for the blood of the innocent. We call them the Cold Ones, but you would say vampires."</p><p>There was such gravitas in her voice that I shivered. Then I pressed the key point.</p><p>"So, how does this tie to the Cullens?"</p><p>"That's the part that hits a little closer to home," Jules admitted, looking slightly uncomfortable again. "According to the stories, my great-grandfather Emphraim inherited the shape changing abilities of our ancestors, along with a few others. They met a group of Cold Ones, but they were very different from the ones that were in the old tales. Their leader spoke calmly to the wolves as if they faced her as men, and one of her followers seemed to understand their thoughts and relay them to her. These Cold Ones claimed that they weren't dangerous, that they didn't hunt people but fed on the blood of animals instead. Though their manner seemed to support their claims, Emphraim wasn't completely convinced. He chanced turning human to properly parley with them, and they agreed on a treaty to keep them off our land. They never broke the pact, and eventually they moved on."</p><p>I was starting to see the connections. "So your mom thinks the Cullens are like these Cold Ones from before."</p><p>"Not quite," Jules said, back in full flow and enjoying herself again as she wove her spooky story. "She believes they are the <em>same</em> ones. There are more of them now, but the leader and her mate, the mind reader and the three other females, they are the exact same group who first crossed paths with my great-grandfather over seventy years ago."</p><p>This final pronouncement hung in the air as I processed what Jules was telling me. It wasn't a theory that had ever crossed my mind, but once I started thinking about it, it certainly seemed like a possibility.</p><p>Jules laughed, breaking the spell. "Geez, look at your face. It's just a story, Bella."</p><p>I tried to smile back, but it felt weak. "Right. Just a story. Of course."</p><p>Before I could ask any more questions, Beau came jogging up. "There you are. I thought you'd left me stranded."</p><p>I popped him lightly on the head; sitting on the truck, I was actually slightly taller than him. "You know I wouldn't do that, dummy. Jules and I were just catching up."</p><p>"Well, the others are packing up. We can stay a bit longer if you want, we're not tied down by the car pool."</p><p>Jules scratched the back of her head and made a face. "I actually have to go. I'm supposed to be working on my homework and if I haven't at least made a start by the time Mom gets back from the Clearwater's then I'm going to be in big trouble."</p><p>I climbed down carefully. "Then we'd better not take up any more of your time. I'm good to go if you are, Beau."</p><p>He nodded. "Want a ride home, Jules? We could drop you off on the way past."</p><p>Jules accepted that offer happily, and after we'd said our goodbyes to the rest of the group, we all piled into the truck. I drove and Beau sat in the centre so Jules could hop out more easily. I didn't really engage in their conversation; there was too much whirling through my head to pay attention. After we dropped her off at a low red single storey house on the edge of the reservation, Beau slid fully into the passenger seat and cranked up the radio, apparently not in the mood to chat either. Despite the quiet, I found I couldn't focus on what I had learned today, and I made no progress working out whether I believed it or not. The best that I could do at that moment was to not think about anything at all.</p>
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<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 7: Nightmare</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Bella deals with the fallout from Jules' revelation.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey all! Hope you're all doing well. Just wanted to update you on the potential new update schedule - I'm going to be aiming for an upload every other week on Fridays, rather than weekly, going forward. This may still slip and will depend on my having the chapter ready in time, but I think it's going to be a realistic timeframe for me.</p><p>We're creeping ever closer to the most exciting parts of the story! XD Enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Charlie was home when we got back, most of his attention focused on a basketball game he was looking forward to; he didn’t seem to notice how quiet I was during dinner, or the looks Beau kept shooting me that were far too assessing for my liking. I suddenly wondered if Jules had ever told him the same stories – did he believe them? A part of me wanted to ask, but most of me was still afraid he would think I was completely bonkers.</p><p>I went to my room as soon as we were done eating, claiming I was extra tired. It wasn’t entirely a lie; I was feeling fairly emotionally drained. I looked for something to occupy my mind, but none of my books seemed appealing in that moment. I turned to my music collection instead. It wasn’t extensive by any stretch of the imagination, but there was a decent amount of variety. As I skimmed through, I found a Linkin Park album that Phil had given me for Christmas. I hadn’t been particularly enamoured with it when I’d listened to it before, but for some reason I found I wanted to give it a try today. I put my headphones on and cranked the volume as loud as it would go; the heavy bass and loud, shrieking vocals made it impossible to focus on anything else. Even so, I concentrated on the lyrics, playing the CD over and over until I had all of them memorised and realised that, past the noise, the band wasn’t half bad after all. Eventually, the volume could no longer combat my exhaustion, and I fell asleep.</p><p>I was almost instantly aware that I was dreaming, but the landscape of the dream was familiar: the path from the beach to the tide pools that I’d walked earlier in the day. The dark tunnel of trees was claustrophobic and oppressive, and I wanted to find the sun. I began following the sound of waves crashing on rocks, when suddenly I was pulled up short by a hand on my wrist. I turned, and Jules was there, trying to tug me back into the darker forest. I resisted, confused by the abject terror on her face.</p><p>“Jules, what’s wrong?”</p><p>“Run, Bella,” she entreated frantically. “Come on, we have to run!”</p><p>“This way, Bella!” I heard Beau’s voice echoing from the opposite direction, perfectly calm.</p><p>“It’s okay,” I said to Jules, trying to soothe her. But she just broke away from me and dropped to the ground, convulsing violently. Before I could shout her name or try to help, I blinked, and the slender young girl was replaced with a lithe, almost fox-like wolf, with red-brown fur and dark eyes. It faced the lighter trees, snarling fiercely.</p><p>“Come here, Bella!” my brother shouted, but the wolf was blocking my path and I couldn’t get around it.</p><p>Then Edward stepped out of the trees, glowing faintly as if he were the source of the light. His eyes were coal black and dangerous, but his smile was inviting as he held out a hand to me. I stepped forward, and the wolf tensed, growling.</p><p>“Trust me,” Edward purred, honey voice dripping through pointed teeth.</p><p>I took another step, moving around the wolf.</p><p>The animal suddenly sprang forward, arcing across the space between us and the vampire, canines headed for his neck.</p><p>“No!” I screamed, jerking upright in my bed. The movement yanked the headphone wire painfully and pulled the CD player off my bedside table. I blinked, dazzled and disorientated by the bright light still on in my room. The clock on the nightstand read 5:30 am. I’d fallen asleep completely dressed; I was even still wearing my shoes.</p><p>Groaning groggily, I kicked off my boots and wriggled out of my jeans, then turned out the light and crawled under the covers. But my brain, left to its own devices, had dredged up all the thoughts I had been trying to avoid and now they were too loud to ignore – or sleep through. I decided to put off facing them properly for a little bit longer while I got myself feeling halfway human again.</p><p>One too-short shower later, I was feeling slightly better. A glance out of my window established that Charlie was gone – I vaguely remembered him mentioning a fishing trip – but I moved as quietly as I could while I got dressed and fetched myself some breakfast so as not to wake my brother. I’d switched on my outdated computer before I got my food, giving it time to groan to life, and by the time I had eaten and done some time-wasting tidying up in my room, it was just about ready to go. Using the Internet was a nightmare here, especially if Beau and I were trying to get on at the same time, so I generally avoided it. Right now, I had no choice.</p><p>Closing down a plethora of irritating pop-up ads, I navigated to my preferred search engine and typed in the word that had been quietly haunting me since Jules first said it.</p><p>
  <em>Vampire.</em>
</p><p>After an interminable wait, I had a lot of results to scroll through before anything promising came up. Movies, TV, makeup, music, video games – I dismissed it all one by one, until eventually I found ‘Vampires A-Z’. The site was what it sounded like: an alphabetised list of vampire myths and stories from all around the world. I began clicking through the entries, at first randomly and then more systematically, mentally checking each one against what I knew about the Cullens. Speed, strength, beauty, pale skin, shifting eye colour... I mixed in the elements from Jules’ story, namely blood-drinking, immortal, cold and enemies of werewolves. To my surprise and disappointment, few of the stories met even one of the criteria. Most stories were about ensuring people got buried properly, or warned about demonic incursions, beautiful seductresses and the untimely deaths of innocent children – superstitions and excuses for prevalent infant mortality or infidelity. Hardly any of the creatures described even drank blood or had any connection with it whatsoever.</p><p>Of the few that did catch my attention, one was particularly striking.</p><p>
  <em>Stregoni benefici: An Italian vampire, said to be on the side of goodness, and a mortal enemy of all evil vampires.</em>
</p><p>That was all that was written in the entry, but it was something of a comfort to find that one tiny shred of evidence that perhaps a good vampire did exist.</p><p>For the most part, though, the site seemed to debunk my latest theory more than it confirmed it. A lot of the common threads between the stories weren’t backed up by anything I had seen so far. Crucially, there was one aspect of vampires that almost every myth agreed on – they were nocturnal. Some were spirits who only rose at night, some used the cover of darkness for their nefarious deeds, but most stories – not to mention the few books and movies I could think of – agreed that sunlight was deadly to vampires. I didn’t think that even Forks’ cloud cover was enough to combat UV death rays. Frustrated, I shut off my computer abruptly. I was being completely ridiculous, getting swept up in stupid stories and mad speculation. I felt the sudden need to be out of the house, away from the whole sopping wet town with its weird alien greenness that made this stuff seem even slightly plausible. But there was no way for me to get away that wouldn’t involve days of driving and essentially stealing my brother’s car, so I would have to settle for a walk.</p><p>I yanked my boots back on and marched down the stairs, intent on the backdoor though I diverted to the front hall for my jacket out of habit. Unfortunately, my preoccupation with all things vampiric had made me forget that I wasn’t currently alone in the house, and I made just a touch too much noise. As I approached the back of the house, the door to Beau’s room opened and my brother’s bleary-eyed head emerged.</p><p>“Bell?” he mumbled, seeming still half asleep. “Whatcha doing?”</p><p>“Just going for a walk,” I tried to reassure him. “I can’t sleep, I think I need some fresh air. Go back to bed, I’m fine.”</p><p>Beau shook his head, both denial and attempt to make it clearer. “Hold on a minute, I’ll come with you.” He held up a hand to silence my protests. “You shouldn’t just go wandering around on your own, sis. At the risk of turning into Charlie, it’s not always safe. Two seconds while I throw on some clothes, okay? Grab my coat for me?”</p><p>I conceded with poor grace, about-facing to collect his jacket. But, true to his word, he was dressed and ready to go by the time I got back, though still yawning.</p><p>“Come on, if it’s too many thoughts keeping you up, I know a great place for thinking.” As so often happened, he’d hit the nail on the head in his assessment of what I was looking for. He led the way across our back lawn and onto the slim trail that led roughly east away from the house. We hadn’t gone far, less than five minutes, when he turned off the path, disappearing completely for the two steps it took me to catch up with him. It wasn’t quite a clearing, just a bubble of space created by a fallen tree that was now moss-covered and provided a nice little seat. Almost like a restaurant booth but made of forest. Beau sat and patted the patch of green beside him; when I sat down, I could tell at once that we were completely hidden from anyone passing on the trail. I closed my eyes and leaned back against the living tree behind the wide trunk. The weak early morning sun struggled to penetrate through the thick canopy, and I turned my face up to catch the ghosts of warmth it offered. When I opened my eyes again, the dappled light was enchanting. The forest felt like another world, a world of magic, a world where things that had seemed ridiculous in my staid little bedroom suddenly seemed entirely possible.</p><p>“Penny for your thoughts?” Beau said softly, breaking my reverie. I knew saying it all out loud would only confirm the craziness of the theory I’d formulated, but I had the sudden burning urge – no, the <em>need, </em>to share my suspicions with my twin, my closest confidante in the world.</p><p>“Do you ever...” I started slowly, trying to find just the right words. “... wonder about the Cullens?”</p><p>I felt Beau sit up a little straighter on the log. “What about them?”</p><p>“Everything.” I shrugged, struggling to stay noncommittal. “How beautiful they all are, how much they seem to have in common, even when they aren’t blood relatives.” I continued, raising a hand to start ticking off fingers. “How they keep to themselves, how they make people uncomfortable, how they sometimes talk like they’re from another time. The way they move, the colour of their eyes, how it keeps changing. They never eat lunch, they never get sick, they appear out of nowhere.” I’d run out of fingers, and Beau hadn’t said a word. I found I wanted him to understand, so I pulled out the big one. The strangest sense of guilt gnawed at my insides, the feeling that I was betraying the promise I’d made to Edward. But I’d promised Beau, no secrets.</p><p>“Edward didn’t just push me out of the way of Tyler’s van,” I said, barely more than a whisper, blending into the hush of the forest. “He stopped it. Just reached out and grabbed it, with his bare hands. And he held it up out of the way, so it didn’t crush my legs.” I shook my head; it was like the hospital confrontation with Edward all over again. “I know it’s completely bonkers but... Beau, I don’t think they’re human. He isn’t, at any rate. And they’re all so alike, even the doctor... it has to be all of them.”</p><p>He was silent so long I wondered whether he had heard me. Then, in a whisper as soft as mine...</p><p>“What do you think they are?”</p><p>My head whipped round to look at him. I’d expected laughter, flat denial, maybe concern for his clearly loopy sister. But Beau was deadly serious.</p><p>“Jules...” I swallowed hard. “Jules told me a story yesterday, and not all of it makes sense... but it’s the only thing that comes close. She called them Cold Ones...” I braced for his reaction to the next word. “Vampires.”</p><p>Again, there was no laughter, no protest, nothing I expected. He closed his eyes, and his expression battled between relief and disappointment.</p><p>“I’m right.” I didn’t have to ask. “I’m right... and you already knew.”</p><p>His eyes popped open and the guilt in their blue depths was immediately clear. “Bella, I-"</p><p>“You knew,” I cut him off, accusatory. I stood up, looming over him for once. “You knew and you didn’t tell me, when you have to know... you have to see... how I...”</p><p>I trailed off, quickly losing steam, unable to build the wave of anger I wanted to unleash. It felt wrong, treacherous again somehow, to voice the next part to Beau first. Before I told <em>him</em>.</p><p>“I thought we didn’t keep secrets from each other.” I finished in a sad little whisper.</p><p>“We don’t,” he insisted, standing so we were toe to toe. “But, Bella, you have to understand, it’s not my secret to tell. There’s people, if they knew that I know, that <em>we</em> know, they’d come after us, after the family.” He squared his shoulders, determination in his eyes now. “I have to protect Edythe.”</p><p>“From me?” I countered. “You think I don’t want to keep her safe too? That I don’t care about her too? Or am I just too fragile to handle the truth?”</p><p>“No, no, that’s not it.” He sighed, frustrated, and ran a hand through his hair, making it stand up at odd angles. “I’m not explaining this right. Come on.”</p><p>He moved around me back on to the trail and grabbed my hand, towing me back towards the house. I tried to dig my heels in but that just made me stumble and I didn’t want to risk pulling both of us over.</p><p>“Beau!” I protested instead. “We aren’t done talking about this!”</p><p>“I know,” he assured me, barely glancing back. “But I need help.”</p><p>“Help? What-” I started to ask, but he just shushed me as we reached the back door. He hustled me inside and through his bedroom door, closing both firmly behind us.</p><p>I hadn’t been in Beau’s room for a while, but it was pretty much a mirror of mine. He had plain blue walls, a Seattle Mariners pennant the sole decoration, with the stripe of purple under the window. There was the small bed, the desk, his own aged computer, and a scattering of small framed pictures; I couldn’t see them clearly but there was a flash of bronze in one that had to be Edythe. He had a slightly smaller wardrobe than me, and in the corner was a squishy blue beanbag in place of the rocking chair I had upstairs.</p><p>I turned back to face him. “Okay, now what?”</p><p>He ignored me, his eyes scanning the room. “You can come out, she knows.”</p><p>“Beau, you have officially stopped making sense,” I said, completely perplexed.</p><p>“Good morning, Bella,” a soft female voice spoke up from behind me.</p><p>I whirled around, my heart skipping a beat. Edythe was perched calmly on the corner of my brother’s bed, as if she had always been there. Her expression was pleasant and calm, just a hint of tension around her eyes.</p><p>“How… Where…” I spluttered, still trying to catch up with what was happening.</p><p>“Hiding in the closet, probably. She’s been here all night,” Beau answered my half-formed questions, moving around me to sit beside Edythe. “She’s here almost every night, actually. And before you ask, nothing inappropriate happened. Fully clothed cuddling only.”</p><p>I wrinkled my nose and shook my head hard. “Ew, Beau! There are some things a girl doesn’t need to hear about her brother.”</p><p>“Agreed,” Edythe piped up, and helpfully changed the subject. “So, you’ve finally figured it out. We were wondering how much longer it would be.”</p><p>“Who wins the pot?” Beau asked, grinning slightly. “Alice?”</p><p>“Of course. Although I think Ellie was close. I’m a little annoyed, I was sure Edward would tell her himself.” She saw my frown and explained. “I’m sorry, Bella, my siblings and I have an awful gambling habit. We had a wager going on how long it would take you to discover the truth. I hope you will forgive us for trivialising something so monumental.”</p><p>I blinked, struggling to keep up with the conversation. “It’s… okay, I think. I’m very confused.”</p><p>Edythe nodded sagely. “Understandable. I’m sure you have a lot of questions. Please, ask me anything you would like to know.”</p><p>There were too many questions; it was hard to prioritise, my brain still circling around the fact that an idea I had been dismissing not half an hour earlier was in fact the truth. Eventually, I settled on one. But it was for my brother.</p><p>“How did <em>you </em>find out?” I asked him. “Did Edythe tell you or...”</p><p>Beau shook his head. “No, she didn’t. It was kind of the same as you, to be honest. When Bonnie Black found out I’d been on a date with a Cullen, she kicked off big time, trying to get Charlie to forbid us from seeing each other. I didn’t understand what was going on, and when I tried to talk to Bonnie, she just said that they were a dangerous family. Eventually I pestered Jules about it so much that she caved and told me the legends. Cue a few days of mild panic...” He smiled at Edythe and she gazed indulgently back. “... before I asked Edythe on another date and confronted her with what I knew.”</p><p>“He was very calm,” Edythe chimed in. “Remarkably so, in fact, given what he had discovered. I already knew that he knew, but I couldn’t imagine why he wanted to talk to me. I was very surprised to be told that his feelings about me hadn’t changed, and that he simply wanted to hear things from my side rather than taking the word of the Quileutes.”</p><p>That led me to another question, but one I thought I might know the answer to already. “Jules mentioned something about a mind reader... is that you, or someone else?”</p><p>Edythe shook her head. “No, that’s Edward. And it’s less reading minds and more hearing thoughts, a second sense of hearing, as he calls it. To him, it’s as if everyone is always talking, all at once.”</p><p>I cringed. “Sounds annoying.”</p><p>She laughed, the sound ringing like a bell. “Yes, well, perhaps that explains his consistently sour mood. He does say he’s able to tune it out most of the time, he’s certainly had enough practice.”</p><p>I thought about asking how long he’d been practicing, then thought better of it and chose another question. “Is that... normal? I mean, you said you can’t do it, but other people...”</p><p>She wobbled her head from side to side. “Yes and no. There are a scattering of other telepaths of various descriptions around the world, and many other special powers too, but not everyone has one. Carine has a theory that every one of us has a particular prominent trait that is enhanced by the transformation process. For some, that means a strong aptitude or physical characteristic, but for some it manifests as a tangible supernatural ability, which we call a gift or a talent. We have quite a few in our family, actually.”</p><p>I was beginning to feel awkward standing in the middle of the room and getting the impression this was going to be a long conversation, so I crossed to the desk chair and sat down. It had the handy side-effect of letting me collect my thoughts before I asked the obvious follow up question.</p><p>“Will you tell me about them?”</p><p>“Of course.” Edythe was smiling softly, invitingly, no hint of judgement in her eyes. I understood that she really would tell me whatever I wanted to know, without hesitation. My brother, on the other hand, looked a little nervous, like he was worrying about my reaction. At first, I thought Edythe was ignoring this, but then I spotted her thumb rubbing soothingly back and forth over the side of his hand where she held it in her lap.</p><p>“As a family, we’re a fifty-fifty split between quote-unquote normal vampires and gifted ones,” she began. “Carine’s... enhancement, for lack of a better word, is her compassion. Earnest’s is his ability to love unconditionally, Rosalie’s, her beauty, and Eleanor’s, her strength. Edward was always very intuitive, even as a human, which manifested as his gift. Likewise, Jasper was very charismatic in his past life, and now has the ability to sense and exert a subtle but distinct influence over the emotions of those around him.”</p><p>“Like, making people happy when they’re sad?” I asked.</p><p>“Potentially,” she replied, tipping her head a little. “Usually he uses it to calm down people who are agitated, but he has a few other tricks up his sleeve. Alice, now she’s an interesting one.”</p><p>“How so?”</p><p>“She’s psychic,” Beau chipped in, looking a little more comfortable and obviously feeling left out of the conversation.</p><p>Edythe rolled her eyes and patted his hand. “Clairvoyant would be a better word, my love. Alice sees things that may come to pass, in both the near and distant future. She spends most of her life two steps ahead of everyone else, and she can search the future for specific outcomes, but every now and then she has visions, spontaneous images that come to her on their own.”</p><p>I frowned. “What kind of trait gave her that ability?”</p><p>“That’s the big mystery, I’m afraid,” Edythe said with a small sigh. “Our best bet is that it’s something she could always do, to an extent, but she doesn’t know for sure. Generally, our memories of our time as humans fade away gradually after we change. Alice is unique, as far as we’ve found, in that she doesn’t remember being human at all. Her first recollection is waking up alone in a forest, with no idea of who or what she was. She would most likely have gone completely feral, had she not had visions of Jasper and the rest of us, and known we would all be together one day.”</p><p>That brought up an interesting question. “Did she see me coming?”</p><p>Edythe smiled. “Something like that. She sees a lot of possibilities at the moment, lots of different ways that things could go. So much of the future is based on decisions, and too many people are undecided right now for her to see anything with certainty.”</p><p>“I suppose that makes sense,” I mused. I was definitely feeling confused about the future, though perhaps a little less so than when I first woke up. “And you? You said half the family was talented, so you are too, right?”</p><p>“Yes, I am. My gift is something like my brother’s, I suppose. More specific in some ways, broader in others. When I was human, I was what you might call a people pleaser. I always had an innate sense of what people wanted from me, and more often than not, I wanted to give it to them. Now I can sense a person’s inner desires, simply by looking at their face.”</p><p>“Their desires?” I fidgeted a little uncomfortably.</p><p>“Yes. A quick glance will give me surface details, what they want for lunch, how they plan to spend their evening, the grade they’re hoping to get on an assignment. The longer I look, the further I see – romantic interest, long term goals, pie-in-the-sky dreams for their future. I’ll admit, it’s a fascinating way to see the world.” She gave me a knowing smile. “I suppose you’re curious to know what I sense from you.”</p><p>I felt my cheeks start turning pink. “I mean... maybe?”</p><p>Edythe chuckled. “Don’t worry, you have nothing to fear. Believe me, I’ve seen it all at this point. Nothing you could want could possibly shock me. But it’s a moot point, regardless – I can’t sense anything from you at all.”</p><p>That startled me a little. “Really, nothing?”</p><p>“Nothing,” she confirmed. “My brother can’t hear your thoughts either. He finds it mildly infuriating.”</p><p>A few confusing moments and comments suddenly made more sense. “He said I was difficult to read.”</p><p>“Quite so. He relies so much on that gift, having it not work was extremely disconcerting for him.”</p><p>I took a moment of quiet, processing everything that I had heard so far. It was... a lot, to say the least. But I felt like maybe I was beginning to have fewer questions than answers.</p><p>“Was that all you wanted to know?” Edythe prompted. “No more questions?”</p><p>“Oh, believe me, I have more,” I assured her. “But... does it make sense when I say I need to hear some of the answers from Edward?”</p><p>She nodded, as did Beau. “Completely. However, there is one that I’m surprised you haven’t asked yet.”</p><p>“Really?”</p><p>She hummed. “Our diet? You aren’t at all curious?”</p><p>“Oh, right. That,” I winced slightly. “Jules said you didn’t... feed from people.”</p><p>Edythe’s bell-like chuckle was incredulous. “So blasé! I really can’t believe how calm you are.”</p><p>I shrugged. “I figured if you were really dangerous, Beau wouldn’t still be here. Or he wouldn’t be with you anymore, at least. He’s not that stupid.”</p><p>“Thanks so much, sister dear,” Beau griped. “You aren’t afraid I’ve been bewitched by her mysterious vampire powers?”</p><p>He wiggled his fingers at me, then drifted them over into Edythe’s face. She batted his hand away gently and rolled her eyes at him.</p><p>“Oh, you’re bewitched alright,” I said with a smirk. “But it’s got nothing to do with <em>what </em>she is and everything to do with <em>who </em>she is.”</p><p>Of this, I was supremely confident. Beau might have originally been drawn to the otherworldly beauty of his girlfriend, just like everybody else. But after months of observation, I knew that their bond was more than that. They had a fundamental understanding of each other that transcended all differences – including species, apparently.</p><p>Beau, as usual, knew exactly what I was talking about. “Fair point. So, that’s it? No more questions for us?”</p><p>I thought about everything I still wanted to know, but it was all either trite nothings or things I really needed Edward to tell me. “No, that’s it.”</p><p>“Are you sure?” Edythe was beginning to look concerned now. “There has to be a story you’ve heard, or a concern you have...”</p><p>Of course, I had more concerns, but at this point they weren’t really vampire related. If my brother and I had been alone, I might have voiced some of them, but I didn’t feel like Edythe and I were quite close enough yet for me to ask her, even if there was a good chance she knew the answer. Still, she looked so intent that I felt the need to ask her something, purely as a courtesy.</p><p>“Um... do you sleep in a coffin?”</p><p>Beau fell about laughing, collapsing back onto his bed. I swung my foot out to kick him, but he was just a little too far away; I barely caught the toe of his boot.</p><p>Edythe, for her part, only smiled. “No, that’s a myth. We don’t sleep at all.”</p><p>“Ever?” I was surprised by that.</p><p>“Ever,” she confirmed. “We keep to a loose day-night schedule because it makes sense for our lifestyle, but the night is more a time for privacy and personal pursuits.”</p><p>I nodded. “That makes sense. Okay, that’s it, at least for now.”</p><p>“Let me ask you just one thing,” Beau said, sitting up, serious as a heart attack now. “Does it matter?”</p><p>“Matter?” I echoed.</p><p>“Does it change anything, knowing what he is? Does it change how you feel?”</p><p>I gave the question all the careful consideration it deserved. And yet, it only took a moment for me to recognise that the anxiety of separation, the prickle of tension that had been background noise since I had last seen him, hadn’t faded away. I wasn’t any less eager to see him tomorrow. I didn’t ache any less for his voice, his eyes, his bizarre mood swings. I was the sort of person who agonised over decisions, but once a choice was made, I stuck by it. My choice was made now.</p><p>“No,” I said at last. “No, it doesn’t matter.”</p><p>Edythe sighed heavily. “Oh, my brother is in so much trouble.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 8: Confirmation</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Bella gets has a visitor and a much anticipated conversation.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Back again! So glad that so many people are continuing to enjoy this story, and I'm really sorry for breaking the new schedule right after I set it, pretty much. As I'm sure everyone can relate to, life is pretty hectic right now. In a good news, bad news situation, I've decided to take part in NaNoWriMo this year for the first time in ages, and I'm using this fic as my project. Good news - lots of progress on the story. Bad news - updates will go on pause until December while I focus on writing and put the editor brain away for a bit. I promise to be back as soon as I can and do my best to stick to a regular upload schedule; however I have to stress that this is a hobby and my work and other life commitments have to come first.<br/>Enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I was jittery on Monday morning, looking forward to seeing Edward, hearing everything from his perspective. The info dump from Edythe had been rattling around my brain all day Sunday while I wrote my Macbeth essay and cleaned the house. So much answered, yet so much still left to ask.</p><p>Beau noticed my preoccupation but waited until we were in the truck to comment on it. “Something exciting at school today?”</p><p>I smiled at him, feeling so much better now that we were back to having no secrets. “The Cullens will be back today, right? I have a lot of things to talk to Edward about.”</p><p>My brother shook his head. “They won’t be back yet, Bell. Look at the weather.” He gestured out of the windshield at the sun still beaming brightly, apparently not confined to the weekend.</p><p>I frowned. “What do you mean? Clearly daylight doesn’t bother them, that’s a myth, right?”</p><p>“It is a myth that they get burned by the sun,” he conceded. “But they can’t come out in direct sunlight. It has an… interesting reaction with their skin. It would be obvious they aren’t human, so they stay out of sight on sunny days.”</p><p>I tilted my head to one side, curious. “What kind of reaction?”</p><p>“It’s hard to describe, you kind of have to see it to understand. I’ll ask Edythe if she’ll show you sometime.”</p><p>I nodded, then slumped a little, disappointment setting in. “So they won’t be back at school until it stops being sunny? When will that be?”</p><p>“Wednesday, according to Alice.”</p><p>“I’m guessing she’s a little more accurate than your average weatherman,” I mused.</p><p>Beau laughed. “Just a little, yeah.”</p><p>I sighed heavily; two more days until I got to ask my questions. More importantly, two more days until I could see him again. I was thrown, as I had been a few times over the last few days, by how much of a priority that suddenly was to me. I had never had these kind of feelings before, and I was finding them very disconcerting. I still wasn’t quite sure what name to put to them – I was hoping seeing Edward again would help me clarify that. For now, I was only helplessly in need of him.</p><p>Beau read my mood perfectly. “You’ve really got it bad, huh?”</p><p>“Does it get any better?” I asked</p><p>“It doesn’t go away, if that’s what you’re asking,” he said. “And you don’t really get used to it either. But it gets... manageable is the best word, I think.”</p><p>“That’s not very reassuring,” I told him honestly.</p><p>He just shrugged. “Best I’ve got, sorry. Welcome to being in love with an immortal.”</p><p>Well <em>that </em>was a big word, and not one I was ready to let myself contemplate. I thought back to our conversation on Saturday, when Beau had brought up romance and my mind had instinctually rejected the idea. Not on my own account, that much I understood; I’d acknowledged my attraction, and there had to be something more to it if his being a blood-sucking creature of the night didn’t make a difference to me. But there was still the matter of Edward being so much <em>more</em> than I was. There was absolutely no way that he could feel the same way about me – the world only had room for one impossible couple, and Beau and Edythe were already filling the quota. Abruptly, I was struck with fear; I’d been so focused on when I would get to see Edward, all the things I wanted to ask him, I’d never stopped to consider that he might not want to talk to me at all. Sure, he’d been welcoming enough last week, but I knew well how quickly his moods could change. And now that I knew the truth, would that be too much for him? Perhaps he could handle talking to me when he could drop vague hints of danger, but an open, honest conversation would overwhelm him.</p><p>Thoughts in the same vein plagued me all the way to school, and for most of the day. I couldn’t even enjoy the sunshine properly, knowing that it was keeping him away. I missed Edythe at lunch, once again bombarded by Tyler. By the end of the day, I was thoroughly miserable, and Beau was visibly concerned. When we got home, the house felt strangely claustrophobic again, and with my big paper finished and most of my other homework dealt with, I decided that I could afford to take an afternoon off and get some much-needed vitamin D exposure. I grabbed an old quilt from the linen closet and my worn out collected works of Jane Austen and went out to the back yard. Picking a spot far from the reach of the trees' shadows, I laid out the quilt and settled down on my stomach, feet crossed in the air. I started flicking through the book to find the story I wanted; <em>Pride and Prejudice </em>was a favourite, but I’d read it recently, so I picked <em>Sense and Sensibility</em> first. However, I was only a few chapters in when I remembered that the male lead was called Edward, which left me hopelessly distracted and unable to focus on the plot. I tried <em>Mansfield Park</em>, but that featured an Edmund – far too similar. I sighed heavily and shut the book with a snap, rolling over and closing my eyes.</p><p>“Abandoning Austen? Who are you and what have you done with my sister?”</p><p>I cracked one eye open, tipping my head to see Beau approaching from the house, his own book in hand.</p><p>“Too many ‘Ed' names,” I admitted. “Honestly, weren’t there any other options in Regency England?”</p><p>He chuckled as he settled cross-legged beside me on the quilt. “What are your feelings on Arthur’s?”</p><p>He waved his book, a battered copy of <em>The Hitch-hikers Guide to the Galaxy</em>. I grinned and nodded. “I could go for some space travel.”</p><p>As Beau started reading out loud, I closed my eyes again, focusing all my attention on the nonsensical adventures of the hapless Arthur Dent and the feeling of the sun washing over my skin. Somewhere around the introduction of two-headed airhead Zaphod and Trillian the beautiful astrophysicist, I must have drifted off, because the next thing I knew, Beau was shaking me awake and the light had completely changed.</p><p>“Hey, sleepy head,” Beau said, holding back a smile. “Time to start making dinner, it’s your turn, remember?”</p><p>I sprang up, bobbled slightly, then regained my footing. The shadows were stretching longer, just touching the edge of the blanket, and the sky was noticeably darker. Strangely, I had the weirdest feeling we were being watched by someone.</p><p>“Why didn’t you wake me sooner?” I griped. “I’m not going to be ready when Charlie gets home.”</p><p>“I’ll help,” he offered, and he did. However, we quickly found that we were not in any way compatible in the kitchen; he kept getting in my way and questioning the instructions I was giving him, and I ended up chasing him out with a wooden spoon just as Charlie pulled into the driveway. I apologised profusely to my dad for the delay, but he waved me off and went to watch the sports channel while he waited.</p><p>“Hey, Dad,” Beau piped up once we were sat eating. “Our group at school are going over to Port Angeles tomorrow to do some shopping for the dance, is it okay if we go too?”</p><p>“Which friends?” Charlie asked, like he didn’t already know all their names.</p><p>“Tyler, Angela, Erica, Jeremy and McKayla.”</p><p>“No Logan?” I asked. The plan was news to me, but I was curious, and Beau clearly intended for us both to go.</p><p>“He’s busy,” Beau explained. “We’d have gone today but Jer and Kay are going on a date.”</p><p>“Fine by me,” Charlie said easily. “But you guys still aren’t going to the dance?”</p><p>“No, Dad,” we said together, then Beau continued, “The guys want some advice from the one of us who’s actually managed to hold down a girlfriend for more than a week.”</p><p>“And girls always like to have other girls help them pick dresses,” I finished, leaving out the fact that I was far from a fashion guru and had only ever gone on that sort of trip with Renée.</p><p>Charlie shook his head at us. “I love you two, but it’s still creepy when you do that.”</p><p>After we’d said goodnight to Charlie and retreated to our rooms, I was just looking around, trying to decide what to do with myself, when I heard Beau thumping up the stairs. He opened my door without knocking, his eyes bright with excitement. Before I could tell him off, he’d closed the door and started talking in a hushed, hurried voice.</p><p>“So Edythe told Edward about our conversation yesterday morning, how cool you were about everything and how you wanted to talk to him, and he’s kind of on the fence but she thinks you could probably convince him, he’s outside right now so all you have to do is open the window and call for him.”</p><p>I blinked, trying to process the rush of information. “Edward’s... outside?”</p><p>“Yes!” Beau’s tone rang with frustration at my slowness. “And he wants to talk to you. Well, not quite, but you could get him to talk to you. He’s only going to sit in a tree watching you all night otherwise.” The last sentence was said in a very pointed way and slightly louder.</p><p>“Can he hear us?” I whispered, aghast.</p><p>“Probably,” Beau admitted. “And he can hear what I’m thinking anyway. So don’t worry about having to yell or anything. Honestly, the open window could be enough, but an invitation will definitely seal the deal. Now, stop jabbering with me and get on with it!”</p><p>I shook my head at him. “You are the weirdest brother ever.”</p><p>“But you love me!” he sang as he left my room as quickly as he had arrived.</p><p>I sat heavily on the edge of my bed, contemplating for a moment the strangeness of a brother who encouraged his sister to invite a boy into her room without their father’s knowledge. In fairness to him, I had never even considered ratting him out for Edythe’s apparently nightly visits. Then I had to address the current point of order – did I want to let him in? I’d been silently bemoaning the time before I could see him again, but was I actually ready, right now, to talk about everything out in the open? I tried to picture him in here, but the image wouldn’t come together. How could something so extraordinary even exist in somewhere so staid and normal?</p><p>Only one way to find out.</p><p>I stood, decided but still nervous, and crossed to the window. It slid more smoothly today, which surprised me; I’d done nothing to it since Saturday and hadn’t mentioned it to the boys. But it was only a momentary wonder, the thought quickly consumed by more pressing matters. I poked my head out, my eyes scanning the trees for a glimpse of white or bronze, but if he was still here he was clearly very well hidden – I could only see dark, shadowed green.</p><p>My fingers shaking where they gripped the window ledge, I cleared my throat and spoke at a normal volume. “Edward, are you there?”</p><p>I cringed slightly at how awkward I sounded and listened for a reply. There wasn’t one.</p><p>I waited another moment, struggling to think of something else to say, before settling on a simple, “Come in,” then ducking back inside and going to sit back on the bed. A cool breeze wafted in through the window, ruffling my hair and making me shiver. I took the blanket folded at the end of my bed and wrapped it around my shoulders. It felt weird to watch the window, but I didn’t want to start doing anything else. A tense minute passed.</p><p>Then a pale hand appeared on the lip of the window. I jumped, my breath hitching, and I saw the knuckles tense and the fingers start to loosen.</p><p>“It’s okay,” I said hurriedly. “You just startled me. Please, stay.”</p><p>The hand paused, then tensed again, and Edward pulled himself into view. He looked just as nervous as I did, with an added note of caution in his eyes. He paused, framed by my window, like something was keeping him from coming inside.</p><p>The rush of relief at seeing him again was palpable and not a little disorienting.</p><p>“Hello,” I said softly, happy that at least my voice didn’t shake.</p><p>“Hello,” he replied, wary.</p><p>He didn’t move and we stared at each other for a moment that became increasingly tense and uncomfortable.  Then he sighed, turned his head over his shoulder and muttered something that I couldn’t hear.</p><p>I wasn’t going to let him get away with that anymore. “What was that?”</p><p>He looked back at me, slightly startled, then composed himself. “Nothing, just talking to my sister. She’s... being a pain.”</p><p>I smiled. “Haven’t you heard? That’s what sisters are for.”</p><p>Finally, he smiled back, just a small curve of his lips. “I believe I have heard something of the kind. May I come in?”</p><p>“Please,” I insisted, probably a bit too fervently but I couldn’t bring myself to care.</p><p>It was a relatively small gap for a fairly large person to climb through, and yet he managed it with a smooth, practiced ease, not in the least bit ungainly. It seemed that one moment he was hovering outside, and the next he was stood in the open space by the window. The image I had been struggling to reconcile was complete, and it was more overwhelming than I ever could have imagined.</p><p>Edward stood perfectly still, watching me intently with butterscotch gold eyes. It was starting to make me slightly uncomfortable, both the stare and the stillness, and I had to look away.</p><p>“Will you sit down?” I asked, awkwardly patting the bed beside me and immediately thinking that might be a bad idea. He was already too much; if he got that close, I could very well explode.</p><p>“I don’t think that would be wise,” he said, a new note of tension in his voice.</p><p>My heart sank, but I tried not to let my disappointment show. “Why? I mean, you sit this close to me in Biology.”</p><p>His face turned dark. “In Biology, there are witnesses.”</p><p>I felt my heart start fluttering at that, his implications more than clear in his tone. From the look he gave me, I could tell that he could hear it too. He sighed heavily.</p><p>“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to frighten you. But there are things that I have to be honest about, for both our sakes, and one of those is how dangerous I am to you, more so than anyone else.”</p><p>I frowned. “Will you explain that? And please, sit down somewhere, the hovering makes it worse.”</p><p>He smiled, very slightly, and folded himself onto the floor where he stood so that he was sitting cross-legged instead, but still the same distance away from me. I pulled my feet up, mimicking his pose, and pulled the blanket around me a little tighter.</p><p>“That’s a very big question to start with. Wouldn’t you rather ease in with something simpler?”</p><p>His tone was calm and collected, but I got the distinct impression that this request was as much for his benefit as mine – he didn’t want to talk about that yet.</p><p>I made a face. “I’m not sure I have any simple questions left. I could ask about the mind reading thing, but I think Edythe gave me a pretty comprehensive run-down on that. The rest are all... silly things. Or very big things.”</p><p>Like ‘How do you feel about me?’ or ‘How do I feel about you?’ I wasn’t sure he would be able to answer either of those.</p><p>“I want to answer silly things,” he insisted. “I want to know every thought you have, every question your mind can come up with. Is there a story you’ve heard, perhaps, or a myth that I can confirm or deny?”</p><p>He <em>really</em> didn’t want to talk about why he was so dangerous. I had been right before; he could do vague, but specifics bothered him for some reason, no matter what he said about wanting to be honest. Yet somehow, I couldn’t help indulging him, just a little longer.</p><p>“Well, Edythe told me about the no sleeping thing, and Beau told me about the sun... sort of.” I thought hard, trying to think of another vampire myth. “What are your thoughts on garlic?”</p><p>Edward smiled, and I immediately knew I would do anything to keep those smiles coming.</p><p>“Smelly, and I’ve no particular attraction to food in general, but it doesn’t repulse me.”</p><p>“Crosses and holy water?”</p><p>“One of many stories concocted to make humans think they have a fighting chance, I’m afraid. I’m actually quite religious, in a way, and Carine certainly is.”</p><p>“Good to know,” I said, smiling back. Then I thought of one he would really like. “Can you turn into a bat?”</p><p>I succeeded; he actually laughed, not loudly but with a genuineness that I didn’t often see from him. His guard was well and truly down, if only for that one short moment. I couldn’t help giggling along.</p><p>“I told you all I had were silly questions,” I reminded him when we had both calmed down.</p><p>“And big ones,” he pointed out, a sombre air beginning to descend.</p><p>“Yes, those too,” I agreed. After a moment of hesitation, I added, “Are you ready for the one I asked earlier? Will you explain properly about being dangerous?”</p><p>Edward sighed heavily, and the urge to hug him was so strong that my hands twitched. <em>Slowly,</em> I reminded myself, <em>don’t spook him.</em></p><p>“How much did Edythe tell you about our... feeding habits?” He cringed slightly; clearly he still didn’t want to talk about this.</p><p>“Not much,” I said, trying to be as casual as I had been on Sunday morning. “She brought it up, surprised I didn’t ask about it, I guess, but then we never really got into the details. Jules told me that you feed on animals instead of people, but the Quileutes wanted you far away from them just in case.”</p><p>Edward hummed in acknowledgement. “The Quileutes have long memories. And that Jules girl is becoming something of a liability, Carine may need to speak with her mother.”</p><p>I winced, hoping I hadn’t just got my new friend in a lot of trouble.</p><p>“But, regardless,” he went on, “she was correct. We have chosen a different path to others of our kind, but that does not make us any less dangerous. If anything, we can be more... explosive, when we do lose control.”</p><p>I took that in, absorbed it while carefully controlling my expression, and asked the question he would probably be expecting. “Does that happen a lot? One of you losing control?”</p><p>He didn’t seem exactly happy to be answering that question, but he was obviously prepared for it. “It depends which one of us you’re talking about. For Carine, never, but she has had many years to perfect her control, her... tolerance, if you will. Jasper is the newest to this lifestyle, the least practiced, so his outbursts have been more frequent. But even for him, it’s been a while.”</p><p>“And the rest?”</p><p>“Once or twice, many decades ago now,” he admitted begrudgingly.</p><p>“That’s not so bad,” I said. “I mean, I’m guessing it’s a lot better than the ones who don’t live like you do.”</p><p>Edward was looking at me like he thought I might have a screw loose, but was either too polite or too afraid of the potential consequences to call me out. Then he pressed on.</p><p>“Of course, I’m only talking about our slip-ups, the times that we actually killed.” He leaned deliberately on the last word, as if to force it to sink into my head. “That doesn’t include all the many thousands of daily temptations and dozens of close calls over the years.”</p><p>“Sure,” I allowed, determined now to stay reasonable and calm, just to prove him wrong. “But wanting and doing are two very different things. I <em>wanted</em> to rear-end you the day you blocked me in so Tyler could accost me, but I didn’t <em>do</em> it. I’d have to check with Charlie, but I’m pretty sure you can’t be arrested just for <em>wanting </em>to crash into someone.”</p><p>Finally, the serious face broke and he smiled. I felt a rush of something like accomplishment for making it happen. Both the feeling and the smile faded quickly, however, giving way to an expression of such deep melancholy that it made my heart rise into my throat.</p><p>“It’s an interesting theory, but there’s a little bit of a gulf between a momentary whim to damage my car and what I was considering on the day we met.”</p><p>I didn’t want to ask, but I had to. “Tell me?”</p><p>Edward’s eyes were pained, his agony beyond obvious; I couldn’t tell if it was something he couldn’t control, or if he was deliberately playing it up for some reason.</p><p>“If I do...” he began slowly, unwillingly, “you must promise to send me away if it’s too much. I will understand, and I won’t fight you on it. As much as I don’t wish for you to think badly of me, I know it is inevitable once you hear the truth.”</p><p>Something about that assumption of my reaction really rubbed me the wrong way, just like his early assumptions about my family. In a split-second decision, I slid off the bed so I was also cross-legged on the floor. I was no more than a foot closer than I had been, but he still tensed. I ignored it, looking him dead in the eye now that we were on the same level.</p><p>“Tell me, and let me decide.”</p><p>A weighty silence hung between us, then he sighed and nodded.</p><p>“Alright. Please, stop me if I scare you.”</p><p>He waited for me to nod my agreement before he went on, then began speaking to the floor rather than looking at me. By now, he was practically radiating shame and discomfort.</p><p>“I knew you were coming, of course. Between Beau and the rest of the school, the rest of the <em>town</em>, I couldn’t help hearing about it. The excitement over you would have been obvious to anyone. With my gift, it was almost unbearable. I had seen you from a hundred different angles before I ever saw you with my own eyes, and I’ll admit, I couldn’t fully understand it, all the anticipation for what appeared to be a very ordinary human girl.” He glanced up, apologetic. “Sorry. I’m trying to be honest about my thoughts at the time, I don’t mean to offend.”</p><p>I shook my head and gave him a little smile. “Please just tell it in whatever way makes sense to you. I won’t be upset or frightened.”</p><p>He looked like he didn’t quite believe that, but kept going. “The only thing remarkable about you, as far as I could tell, was that I couldn’t hear your thoughts. That had never happened to me before, and I worried that perhaps something was wrong with me. But everyone else came through as loud and clear as ever. Only you were silent. When I realised you were in my class, I was actually glad. I hoped that if you were closer, I would be able to hear you, or I could talk to you and try to unpick some of your thoughts through your voice or on your face. But then, you walked past that accursed vent.”</p><p>His expression turned angry then, a pale shade of the anger that had been in his eyes that day – I shuddered just remembering <em>that </em>look. This was less fury and more loathing, and I could tell instinctually that the emotion was turned inward, directed squarely at himself. I once again felt the urge to go to him, comfort him, reassure him that everything was okay. But I knew that I needed to let him speak at his own pace and in his own time; this was a painful story for him to tell, and only once it was all out in the open would he trust my reaction. Still, when a few seconds of tense silence had passed, I had to prompt him.</p><p>“You looked... very angry,” I whispered, just about holding in the cringe at that understatement.</p><p>He laughed darkly, one harsh chuckle. “Yes, I suppose I was. In that moment, with your scent washing over me... I had never wanted anything in all my life as much as I wanted to taste your blood. I was thirsty that day, overdue for a hunt, but it was more than that. Everything else I had ever smelled paled in comparison to you. And I <em>was</em> angry, angry that you were tempting me so, angry that I couldn’t have you right then and there like I wanted to. You were like... like a demon, summoned from Hell to burn me, to ruin me, to undo years of restraint in a moment of weakness.”</p><p>Edward put his face in his hands, scrubbing roughly before gliding them up to knot his fingers in his hair. My hand reached out without my permission, but I caught myself and pulled it back.</p><p>“That whole hour,” he continued in a low, rough voice, “I was concocting plans in my head. All the ways I could minimise the number of witnesses, minimise the noise and commotion that would be caused, while giving me as much time with you as possible. First it was the route I would take around the classroom, the time it would take to snap every neck so that none of them could raise the alarm.”</p><p>Without meaning to, I shuddered as I pictured the members of my Biology class and thought of how close I had come to inadvertently being the cause of their deaths.</p><p>“Then I decided that that was too much death, too much destruction. If I was going to completely disappoint my mother, I could at least keep the extent to a minimum. I began to think about how I could get you alone, offer to show you to your next class and simply lead you off into the woods or some such scheme. And when that wasn’t good enough, I started to consider following you home, catching you alone in the house before your father got back, climbing into this very room-"</p><p>He broke off, almost choking on his own awful daydreams.</p><p>“Beau...” I whispered reflexively.</p><p>Edward nodded. “Yes, he was the hiccup in that particular plan. He would know exactly what had happened, and my sister wouldn’t have let me silence him. There was always a problem with every idea I came up with, and I wonder now whether it wasn’t my subconscious trying to turn me away from carrying out that most heinous act. Always, too, the thought of Carine, how upset she would be, how much trouble I would cause for the others, kept me from moving forward with any of my schemes. Instead, I spent the hour planning and burning, and raced away as soon as I could. In the fresh air I could think clearly, and I knew I had to get far away if I was going to have any chance of resisting your pull. I waited for my siblings to finish school, then dropped them near home and went straight to my mother. We traded cars – she had a full tank of gas – and the next morning I was in Alaska.”</p><p>That startled me a little. “That far?”</p><p>He looked almost embarrassed. “We have friends there, so that was part of it. But yes, I did feel I had to be that far away from you. Had I stayed in town a merely skipped school, there would still be too much temptation to go to your house, or to linger in the shadows, ready to pounce the moment you were alone and vulnerable.”</p><p>I was trying to see things from his perspective, to put aside any horror or fear I might be feeling and truly understand. It was difficult; I still didn’t fully comprehend everything he was talking about, so far removed was the story from anything I had ever experienced. I was pleased to find that I wasn’t actually all that frightened. If I had known all this at the time, I might have been. But I knew him now, at least better than I had then. I felt I had a sense of who he was, deep down. More importantly, my answer to Beau’s final question yesterday hadn’t changed – it didn’t matter. My mind wasn’t changed by the sorry tale; if anything, I still felt the overwhelming urge to comfort him for what he saw as such a horrendous failing on his part.</p><p>“You came back though,” I said, voice even, trying to keep only curiosity in my tone.</p><p>He looked slightly startled, then almost suspicious. “Yes, I did. I decided that I wasn’t going to be beholden to my baser instincts, or to you. You were just a girl, nothing special, why should you chase me away from my family, from the place I wanted to be?” He cringed. “Just thinking about my thoughts then is uncomfortable, with how everything has changed.”</p><p>That caught my attention. My heart started thumping, and I willed it to slow down before he noticed. The air suddenly felt charged with... something, something big and important and potentially life-changing.</p><p>“Changed how?” I breathed.</p><p>Edward’s eyes locked onto mine, the deep gold burning with newfound intensity. It was a searching, piercing gaze, seeking understanding and answers in my eyes where my shrouded mind was closed to him.</p><p>“Aren’t you afraid?” he said softly, incredulously. “Bella, I just told you that I want to <em>kill </em>you. Make no mistake, that urge has not gone away. Being here alone with you is the most dangerous thing I have ever done. I should leave, <em>you </em>should be sending me away. But you’re just...”</p><p>“Waiting for an answer to my question,” I finished for him. “Edward, I understand that you could hurt me if you wanted to. I understand that a part of you <em>does </em>want to. I swear, I’m not ignoring that, I just... I know it doesn’t make a lot of sense, but I trust you.”</p><p>He shook his head violently, standing up in one fluid movement that I would have missed if I’d happened to blink. I stood too, much less gracefully, the blanket still around my shoulders falling to floor with a soft thump. He turned to the window, but I stepped around him; he froze at my nearness, giving me the chance I needed to get between him and his escape route.</p><p>“You’ve had plenty of chances to play out one of your plans,” I pressed on. “Weeks and weeks when you could have lured me off on my own. Last week, you could have insisted that I ditch Biology with you. Hell, when you drove me home, we were all alone in your car for what, half an hour? And no one was home, you could easily have got in. Clearly-” I gestured to the window behind me, “-scaling a building is not an issue for you. Or you could have not brought me home at all, driven out into the woods somewhere no one would ever find me, where no one could prove that you had done anything.”</p><p>“Beau would know...” Edward mumbled, sounding almost weak. For once, I had the upper hand.</p><p>“Yes, because you made sure he knew who was taking you home. Sure, he could have worked it out, and maybe your family would realise, but you chose to tell them. You made sure that you could be held accountable. I bet you wouldn’t have come in here if Edythe wasn’t downstairs right now, probably listening to all of this. You know she can stop you if you try to do something you shouldn’t.”</p><p>He shook his head. “She’s not fast enough for that.”</p><p>I ignored him. “I think you will always make sure that there is something which you perceive is stopping you from hurting me, whether it’s people around, or someone waiting for me, or someone knowing we’re together. You will always set up that barrier for yourself, because as much as there is a part of you that wants to hurt me, there is also a part that <em>doesn’t</em> want to. And right now that part is winning.”</p><p>My final pronouncement seemed to hang in the air between us, settling like snow. Edward stared at me like he was seeing me for the first time. I gazed back, getting a little lost in those beautiful eyes. I could feel a bit of my strength melting – not in a bad way, just in a gooey, weak-kneed, swoony sort of way that I didn’t know could happen outside of a novel. But I did see, deep in his eyes, just the smallest spark of hope. I knew he believe me yet, but he wanted to, and that was something. That was everything, because if he wanted to believe me, maybe he wanted to trust me too.</p><p>“How have things changed?” I asked again, softly, not wanting to break this quiet, soft moment.</p><p>More than once, I had answered one of his questions too readily, too truthfully, because his otherworldly gaze had discombobulated me. Now, somehow, I was apparently having the same effect on him. His voice was just as quiet as mine when he finally replied.</p><p>“When I came back, at first I was just doing damage control,” he began. “I knew I hadn’t presented a very good human face to you, and I had to fix that. I fed to excess the night before, trying to quench my thirst so I could focus on making sure you had no suspicions. It was kind use, I burned just as fiercely. But I could at least concentrate, I could be polite, and when we started talking... I got swept away by simply hearing about your family. I found myself analysing every minute expression on your face, hoping for some clue to the thoughts behind your words. You... fascinated me. It became more than cordiality, I really did want to know every mundane detail of your life. I still do.” He gave a bashful half-smile, then went serious again. “And then, when I had barely begun to unpack all the ways you perplexed me, the chance was almost snatched away from me.”</p><p>I knew what he was talking about. “The van.”</p><p>He nodded. “Yes, that. You asked me why I did it, why I <em>bothered</em>.” He said that word disdainfully, clearly not liking it. “I told you I didn’t know, and that was partly true. Afterwards I came up with an excuse. If you had been hit, if your blood had spilled across that blacktop, fresh and exposed, I don’t think I could have stopped myself from exposing us. But I only thought of that much later, when I knew I would have to explain myself to my family, some of whom were very unhappy with what I did do. In the moment, the only thought in my head was, ‘Not her.’”</p><p>Slowly, caution tightening the sides of his eyes, Edward reached out and ran his finger down a loose-hanging strand of my hair. My breathing hitched and my heart pounded, but I held absolutely still. He twisted the end of the strand gently around his finger tip, watching it as he spoke.</p><p>“I’m not sure when it happened, but sometime in the last few months, you have become incredibly precious to me. I almost don’t recognise the man I was before we met, the man who dared to think that you were ordinary.” He released my hair and recaptured my eyes. “Now I see that nothing could be further from the truth.”</p><p>In that moment, gazing into each other's eyes in my small, boring bedroom, I couldn’t even begin to process that. About one thing, however, I was absolutely certain.</p><p>I was utterly, unequivocally, and unconditionally in love with Edward Cullen.</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 9: Closer</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The conversation in Bella's room concludes.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey folks, it's been a while! I spent November working on this story as my NaNoWriMo project, and though I didn't manage the full 50k I did make some pretty substantial progress. After that real life got a bit crazy and posting was honestly the last thing on my mind, but i have a few weeks break now so I'm hoping to get some more writing done and a few more updates in too!<br/>Hope you enjoy the chapter!<br/>(P.S. for anyone who hasn't already spotted it, I posted a one-shot about Edythe asking Beau out for the first time, check it out if you're interested)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was a moment that felt like it would last forever. I very much wanted it to; in this space, everything exposed, all the walls gone, I could feel the connection that had always hummed between us, but stronger, purer, without the veil of secrets. We were stood closer than we ever had before, despite his attempts to keep his distance, and the small space of air between us crackled with electricity. I knew that if I reached out and touched his hand, I would feel that spark again, like the first day he spoke to me, what felt like years ago now.</p><p>But nothing can really last forever, and like every moment, it had to end.</p><p>Edward was the one to break it, looking down and taking half a step back. I thought I heard him sigh ever so slightly.</p><p>“I should go,” he said, sounding like that was the last thing he wanted to do. “You need your sleep.”</p><p>“I’m not tired yet,” I insisted. “Even Charlie won’t be expecting me to go to bed for a while. We could talk some more... if you wanted to.” I was desperate for him to stay, pathetically so if I was being honest. It felt like the moment he left my sight, it would all be over, like a dream. I hoped I was interpreting his expression correctly, because I thought it looked like he was happy I didn’t want him to leave.</p><p>“Do you have more questions?”</p><p>“Just a few thousand,” I replied, only half joking. “Everything I learn just seems to lead to more of them.”</p><p>He smiled and held out a hand invitingly. “Then please, ask away.”</p><p>I crossed the room to sit back on my bed, this time sitting up against my headboard with a pillow behind my back. I secretly hoped that he would sit on the bed this time and tried to give him as much space as I could to do so. For a moment, I thought he might do it; he came and stood right by the foot of the bed, hovering for a moment. In the end though, he merely picked up the blanket I had discarded on the floor, folded it neatly and laid it across the comforter. Then he sat on the floor again, although he stayed right up against the bed, leaning one elbow on the mattress. He was ever so slightly closer than he had been, and my heart rejoiced.</p><p>A sudden thought struck me, and my first question came out more tentative than I would have liked, especially with the confidence and assertiveness I had somehow managed to establish in the last few minutes.</p><p>“Is there anything I can’t ask about? Not things you don’t want to tell me – although that’s totally your prerogative and feel free to tell me to butt out – more like are there any... I don’t know, taboos? Things that are rude or would offend you?”</p><p>His smile turned faintly indulgent. “No, nothing like that. There are some things I would rather keep to myself, and of course I’ll let you know. I meant what I said earlier, I want to be as honest as I can with you.”</p><p>“Okay.” I nodded. “Well, I guess following on from what we were talking about before, tell me why you chose to hunt animals instead of people.”</p><p>That made him turn sombre again, which I didn’t like at all, but the question was out, and I could only hope the answer let me pull things back in a lighter direction.</p><p>“Partly it’s upbringing, I suppose you could say. It’s the way Carine has been living all her life – her second life, at least. There’s an element of personal choice to it too. I don’t <em>like</em> causing death and destruction. I don’t <em>want </em>to be a monster. But animals aren’t always enough.”</p><p>I tilted my head to the side, trying to connect that idea to something I could understand more easily. “Like when you have a snack instead of a meal and a few hours later you feel sort of hollow?”</p><p>Edward chuckled, still darkly, but it was progress and I wasn’t about to discount that.</p><p>“It’s been a while since I’ve had that experience, so it’s hard for me to say,” he mused. “I’m not sure that’s quite the right comparison. I think it’s more like living on tofu and soy milk when you’re used to steak and full cream – sustaining but not precisely satisfying.” He smirked. “We actually call ourselves vegetarians, a little inside joke in the family. Regardless, it keeps the thirst at bay enough to resist other temptations. With varying levels of difficulty.”</p><p>He nodded toward me significantly. I felt a blush rising in my cheeks, immediately realising that that was probably the worst possible reaction I could have at this moment and cursing my uncooperative body. Willing the pink to go away quickly, I asked another question.</p><p>“Is this difficult for you? Being here, I mean? I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”</p><p>“It isn’t easy,” he admitted, somewhat unwillingly. “I’m sure you can imagine how... intense your scent is in here, surrounded by all your possessions, your clothes, your sheets.” His hand curled into my comforter, balling it up slightly before releasing it and smoothing the creases out of the fabric. “I can manage it okay though. It’s easier the longer I sit here.”</p><p>I beamed at that. “I’m glad. I don’t like the thought of you struggling or hurting when you’re around me.” That was probably too much to admit, and I felt like there might be another blush coming if he commented on it, so I quickly redirected the conversation. “And you’re not hungry today.”</p><p>Edward looked at me curiously. “How can you tell?”</p><p>I shrugged. “Your eyes, and your mood. I have a theory about that, actually.”</p><p>Now he was amused. “Oh really?”</p><p>“Yep,” I said with confidence. “You tend to be more relaxed when your eyes are light, and crabbier when they’re dark. I’ve noticed that people, especially boys, are always grumpier when they’re hungry.” I laughed to myself, remembering a story. “Renée took us on a mini road trip one summer and forgot to stop for lunch, and I’ve never known Beau in such a bad mood before or since. You should have seen how he devoured dinner that night, it was like he was afraid someone was going to try and steal it from him. Pro tip, never get between my brother and a bacon double cheeseburger.”</p><p>Edward laughed softly with me, and his laugh washed over me like warm honey. “I’ll keep that in mind.” Then his look turned contemplative again, assessing me once more as if seeing me for the first time, as if he too was finding out new information tonight. “You are much more observant than I realised.”</p><p>“Maybe I just pay attention to the important things,” I suggested, and he hummed in agreement.</p><p>“Were you hunting this weekend with Jasper and your dad?” I asked after a moment of quiet.</p><p>“Actually, I was hunting with Eleanor. She’s a more... affable companion these days. Nothing fazes her. Earnest is very calming but a little too parental at times, and Jasper...” He cringed slightly. “Let’s just say we’re not in the best place at the moment.”</p><p>I frowned. “Can I ask why? Not that it’s really any of my business, forget it.”</p><p>He shook his head firmly. “You can ask. It concerns you, I suppose. At least, it’s partly you that’s caused it.”</p><p>That horrified me, and he could clearly tell, because he hurried to reassure me. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, that came out wrong. You haven’t done anything except be you.”</p><p>“Then what’s wrong?” I prompted. “You shouldn’t be fighting with your family over me.” What a concept <em>that </em>was – Edward caring enough to fight about me with <em>anyone</em>.</p><p>“It’s not like that,” he insisted. “Really, it’s no worse than when Edythe started seeing Beau. The only difference is I’m on the other side of the argument this time, and I’m getting it a lot heavier from those that disapprove.”</p><p>I thought I could probably guess who that might be. “Jasper and Rosalie?” When he looked a little startled, I clarified. “Beau said they didn’t like him very much, especially Rosalie.”</p><p>Edward sighed. “Yes, she can be difficult. It all comes from a place of love, and it’s not so much that she doesn’t like him, she just worries about what he – and now you – could represent. Having humans know about us is a liability, a possible source of exposure and with it, danger. She doesn’t like the idea of having to move on and start over again. It’s practical, not personal, but her personality and general demeanour means it can come off the wrong way if you don’t know her.”</p><p>“Why are they being harder on you?” I wondered, trying not to read too much into the way he was paralleling us with our romantically attached siblings.</p><p>“The van incident,” he said with a chagrined smile. “Edythe merely asked a boy to a dance and we pounced on her like lions on a gazelle. After what I did, exposing my abilities so obviously in front of so many people, my brother and sister nearly tore my head off. Even when it was clear only you had seen anything significant, there were a few tense days when we were waiting to see what you would tell people.”</p><p>“I told you I wouldn’t say anything,” I reminded him.</p><p>“You did,” he agreed. “And you kept that promise admirably. Thank you for that, by the way. I don’t think I ever properly expressed my gratitude.”</p><p>I preened just a little at his praise. “You’re welcome.”</p><p>“They do make some good arguments, if I’m being honest,” he went on, returning to our current main talking point. “The problem is all that has somehow ceased to matter much to me. Being with you feels much more important.”</p><p>I definitely liked the sound of that. “And Eleanor is more accepting?”</p><p>“Oh, she thinks I’m completely mad, of course, just like the rest of them.” He grinned, a new twinkle in his golden eyes. “The difference is that Ellie has always been the sort of person to roll with the punches, so to speak. If her brother and sister have lost their minds and fallen for humans, well, that’s just life now, best get on with it. She spent a lot of the last few days making fun of how anxious I was to come back here. Honestly, I didn’t want to leave in the first place, but being around you is a little easier if I’m not thirsty.”</p><p>There was a lot to unpack in what he had just said – not least the many implications of <em>fallen for</em> – so I chose to focus on the part that was least likely to make me start hyperventilating. “What makes you so anxious?”</p><p>Edward gave me a look that plainly said that should have been obvious. “Because from my observations, it seems that anything in a ten-mile radius with the potential to cause an accident will somehow manage to find you. Honestly, it seems like a minor miracle that you made it out of this weekend unscathed.”</p><p>I huffed, slightly affronted. “You know, I’m more than capable of taking care of myself. I’ve been doing it for the better part of seventeen years.”</p><p>“Perish the thought,” he said, a teasing tone creeping into his voice. Reflexively, I put my foot out and poked his outstretched hand with my big toe, irritation overtaking caution as it so often did with him. As soon as I realised what I’d done, I froze, hoping I hadn’t pushed him too far without meaning to. He did stiffen, but then turned toward my door.</p><p>“Your father is coming,” he murmured. “I really should go.”</p><p>“Not yet,” I begged, only slightly ashamed to be pleading with him. He looked genuinely torn for a moment, but then even I could hear Charlie’s footsteps outside the door and Edward had disappeared. I did my best to compose myself so my father wouldn’t be suspicious. It didn’t work; my heart had plummeted, and I could feel my eyes watering.</p><p>There was a soft tap at the door then the creak of the hinges as Charlie cracked it open and peeked in.</p><p>“You heading to bed, Bells?” he asked, the picture of parental concern. “It’s getting kind of late.”</p><p>I glanced at my nightstand, surprised to see that he was right. I’d come up not long after seven and it was now pushing nine thirty, past the time I normally got ready for bed.</p><p>“Sorry Dad, I got distracted.” I patted the book on my bedside table, glad that I had one there as usual and hoping he wouldn’t notice that I hadn’t had my nose buried in it when he looked in. “I’ll jump in the bathroom now.”</p><p>I got up and grabbed my wash bag and a set of pyjamas. Charlie backed out of my doorway to let me pass and retreated to his own bedroom, wishing me goodnight. I brushed my teeth and changed as quickly as I could, my heart starting to pound. Every moment I was away was a moment for Edward to change his mind, to decide he shouldn’t stay, to be far away from here before I even knew he was gone – assuming he hadn’t left already, of course. I was so focused on getting back to my room before that happened, I didn’t notice my brother waiting outside the bathroom and ploughed straight into him.</p><p>“Gah!” I yelped as he grabbed the tops of my arms to steady me. As usual, this just made both of us wobble, but we stabilised quickly.</p><p>“How’s it going?” Beau asked softly, glancing furtively down the landing to make sure we weren’t being overheard by Charlie.</p><p>“I don’t know,” I answered honestly. “The mood keeps changing, he’s talking about leaving but I don’t want him to go yet.”</p><p>“Just take it slow. There’s no rush, Bella.”</p><p>I just shook my head, unable to explain just how wrong he was. I had to take advantage of every moment I had – who knew when another bid to save my life would result in a second spontaneous trip to Alaska, perhaps more extended this time?</p><p>Beau gave me a short, sharp hug, then pushed me gently back towards my room. “Go on then, Little Miss Anxious. As long as you don’t forget, he can’t actually stay in your room forever. Believe me, I’ve tried having that argument.”</p><p>I sighed heavily. “Don’t remind me. Goodnight, Beau.”</p><p>“Goodnight, little sister,” came the cheeky reply.</p><p>I just rolled my eyes and threw, “Two minutes!” over my shoulder. Beau laughed, and Charlie’s door cracked open.</p><p>“Beau, leave you sister alone and get yourself ready for bed.”</p><p>“Sir, yes, sir!”</p><p>“Stop that, you goofball. Come on, you have school tomorrow.”</p><p>I closed the door on the boys, smiling at Beau’s silliness. Even when he wasn’t trying to, my brother still managed to lift my spirits.</p><p>“What’s in two minutes?”</p><p>I whirled, finding Edward seated calmly in the rocking chair in the corner of my room. I had barely begun to panic, but the relief that he was still here was dizzying all the same.</p><p>“I thought you’d left,” I breathed.</p><p>“You asked me not to,” he said simply, as if that was all it took. If only. “Are you going to answer the question?”</p><p>I shook my head and smiled. “There’s nothing in two minutes. It’s just something I do when he calls me his little sister – I remind him I’m only two minutes younger.”</p><p>“Oh, I see.” Edward tipped his head slightly sideways, like he was trying to figure out a puzzle.</p><p>I sat down on the end of my bed. “Don’t you do silly things like that with your siblings?”</p><p>“We don’t really have that kind of relationship,” he admitted, sounding regretful. “Eleanor teases a lot, but that’s about it, and it’s more annoying than anything else. I must admit, I’ve always wondered if twins really are more closely bonded than other siblings.”</p><p>I rolled my eyes. “Not you too. You better not ask me if I can tell when he hurts himself or gets sick or something.”</p><p>Edward chuckled. “Alright, I won’t. I do miss that kind of camaraderie though. It’s a little different after a decade or two.”</p><p>“Did you have brothers and sisters growing up?”</p><p>“Just Edythe. That part of our cover story is true, she’s really my biological sister. I only have vague memories of my childhood, but I seem to recall an inside joke or two that has been lost to the ages.”</p><p>I opened my mouth to ask how they had both come to be part of the Cullen family, but the words were swallowed by a massive yawn. I was apparently more tired than if thought.</p><p>“Alright, now even <em>I </em>know you need to sleep,” Edward insisted.</p><p>I sighed but gave in, crawling under my covers. Then I looked back at him, comfortable and unmoving in the rocking chair. The sensation of being observed was distinct, reminding me of earlier in the back yard, and a thought suddenly struck me.</p><p>“Have you been watching me today?”</p><p>He fidgeted; the motion looked odd coming from him.</p><p>“Will you be terribly angry if I say I’ve been watching since last night? And that it isn’t the first time?”</p><p>Horror swept over me at the realisation of what twenty-four hours of observation might have provided him with. Namely...</p><p>“Please tell me you haven’t heard me sleep talking.”</p><p>He made a face. “I promised to be honest...”</p><p>“Oh god!” I buried my face in my hands, feeling the heat as it blazed red. I knew I talked in my sleep from time to time – Beau had teased me about it enough over the years – but given the dreams I’d been having for the last few months, there was a high chance Edward had heard something so completely beyond embarrassing that there wasn’t even a word for it.</p><p>“I won’t do it again if you don’t want me to,” Edward said. “But, if I’m being honest, staying away from you is becoming increasingly difficult. My mind can’t help concocting nightmares about what awful things could happen to you when I’m not around.”</p><p>My embarrassment faded into something like sadness. When I peeked through my fingers at him, he looked like the weight of the world was on his shoulders.</p><p>“It’s the same for me, you know,” I said softly, hoping that it would make him feel just a little better. “I get anxious when I don’t know where you are too.”</p><p>It was apparently the wrong thing to say, because he looked sadder than ever at my admission. “That’s what I’m afraid of.”</p><p>I hated this roller-coaster we’d apparently started ourselves on, one moment joking and laughing, the next intense and melancholy. I was drained, emotionally and now physically too. At least for a few hours, it was time to get off the ride. Still, I couldn’t help holding on just a few precious minutes more.</p><p>“Will you stay a little while longer tonight? At least until I fall asleep?”</p><p>He considered for a moment, then nodded. “I can do that. Is there anything I can do to help facilitate the process? I imagine my sitting here staring at you wouldn’t be terribly conducive to feeling restful.”</p><p>I thought about it for a minute, then picked up the book from the nightstand – my Austen collection, I realised belatedly – and held it out to him. He stood and crossed the room to fetch it, carefully not letting our hands touch, then returned to the rocking chair. I lay down and pulled the covers up to my chin, curling on my side and watching as he flicked through the pages.</p><p>“It is a truth universally acknowledged,” he began, his rich voice hugging the words like plush velvet, “that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.”</p><p>I closed my eyes, a hint of a smile brushing my lips at his choice of novel, and let the words wash over me. I thought back to Beau reading earlier and my impromptu nap; this was a very different scenario, despite the surface similarities. Although his presence and my hyper-attention to it did make me feel more awake, Edward’s voice was a thousand times more potent than my brother’s, and I was sure he was barely at the end of the first page when I drifted into the comfortable warmth of dreamless unconsciousness.</p>
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<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 10: Interrogations</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Many questions are asked, not all of them welcome.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey all, Merry Early Christmas! As I go to upload I am realising just how long this chapter is, but I really wanted to get back in sync with the chapter breaks from the book, given that the last few chapters have been such a departure from the original story.<br/>Regarding update schedule going forward, I think I'm unfortunately going to have to fall back on my old standard of putting things up as soon as their ready, which means the consistency is well and truly going out the window, but honestly it was already at that point so not much will change.<br/>I hope you enjoy the story regardless of the complete lack of predictability XD</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When I woke up the next morning, sunlight was pouring into the room again, and Edward was nowhere in sight. I lay still for a moment, wondering if the whole thing had been some kind of elaborate dream. It felt impossible that we could have had the conversation I remembered. Then I rolled over and there was a distinct crinkling sound and something very much not fabric between my cheek and my pillow. I pulled out the folded piece of paper, my heart thudding when I saw the elegant curve of my name written in Edward’s flawless calligraphy. I unfolded the note eagerly.</p><p><em>Stay safe today. Enjoy school and your afternoon in Port Angeles. You won’t see me until tomorrow, but I’ll</em> <em>be close. Please let me know if you’d rather I wasn’t. I will understand.</em></p><p>There was no signature, but there didn’t need to be. Every aspect of the note showed care and attention to detail, from the curve of each letter to the finality of each full stop, right down to the precision of the fold across the middle. I recognised that the page was torn from one of my notebooks, but it was hard to tell as the edge was barely feathered, not like the mess I often made tearing pages out of books like that. He must have used one of my many run-of-the-mill ball point pens too, yet he’d apparently treated these very staid materials as if they were the finest ink and parchment paper. I had a sudden fanciful vision of him writing long letters to friends and relations back in years gone by, sitting at an old-fashioned scroll top desk, perhaps using a fountain pen or even an ink pot and quill pen. I’d never got around to asking his age last night, still not quite sure that I wanted to know, so I wasn’t certain how far back my mental time machine needed to travel.</p><p>The window was still open, a soft breeze drifting in and fluttering the curtains. I went over, leaned on the sill and stuck my head out. Like last night, I scanned the tree line for any sign of him, and just like last night, there was none. Yet unlike last night, I felt absolutely confident that he was out there, watching, my very own guardian angel – or rather, guardian vampire. I wondered idly if that was a complete oxymoron or simply very unlikely.</p><p>“Good morning, Edward,” I said softly, knowing as surely as I knew he was watching that he would close enough to hear me. “You don’t have to follow me around all day, I’m sure you have better things to do. But if you want to, I don’t mind.”</p><p>I took one last deep breath of morning air, waited one last second to see if he would materialise – he didn’t – then ducked back inside and went about my day.</p><p>Charlie was already gone, apparently called in early to some emergency with a case he was helping prepare for court. Beau was beaming when he joined me at the breakfast table, practically skipping down the stairs. In a not at all rare moment of what I refused to acknowledge as twin telepathy but was instead my particular ability to read my brother, I knew exactly what was coming next.</p><p>“Please don’t start,” I begged.</p><p>He looked affronted. “Start what? I didn’t even say anything.”</p><p>“You’re looking triumphant,” I informed him, already exasperated. “It’s the same look you got when I told you couldn’t fit all those mini marshmallows in your mouth when we were ten, and you did it just to prove me wrong.”</p><p>Beau laughed. “Man, that was a good day. Tragic waste of marshmallows though.”</p><p>“Well you couldn’t exactly swallow them, you didn’t have enough space left to chew. They had to come back out the way they went in.” I made a face, remembering the gooey mess he’d spat all over Renee’s kitchen floor.</p><p>His laugh faded to a chuckle as he poured milk on his cereal and dug in. “So what am I <em>triumphant </em>about today, dear sister?”</p><p>I gave him an arch look. “Last night, of course. Don’t tell me you weren’t making Edythe give you a full play-by-play the entire time.”</p><p>“I would never! Do you think I have no respect for your privacy?”</p><p>“I know you don’t,” I informed him flatly. “Remember Brody Phillips?”</p><p>His cheeks turned slightly pink. “In my defence, the guy was a creep. What kind of teenage boy convinces his family to change their vacation plans just so he can follow the pretty girl from his Math class all summer?”</p><p>We both shuddered at that memory – that had been an interesting few weeks in California – before I got us back on the topic at hand.</p><p>“So you weren’t sat in your room listening to your girlfriend recounting everything that was happening upstairs?”</p><p>“Not everything,” was his response, paired with a trademark Beau Swan grin that was clearly meant to turn the whole thing into a joke and get him off the hook.</p><p>I kicked at the leg of his chair, missed and glanced off his shin. I was not in the least bit distressed by this accidental injury, and I did not apologise.</p><p>Beau pouted. “You’re so mean all of a sudden. I don’t like what this boy is doing to you. Maybe I should be more opposed to him.”</p><p>“Oh shush, you big baby, it wasn’t that bad. And completely justified when you’re being an ass.”</p><p>He sputtered at that, clutching his chest like I’d deeply wounded him. I couldn’t help giggling, the theatrics finally achieving what he’d been aiming for over the last few minutes – making me laugh so I wouldn’t be mad at him.</p><p>“Honestly, she didn’t tell me that much,” Beau admitted when we’d both calmed down and gone back to munching. “Just that he was being melodramatic, and you weren’t letting him get away with it. Good for you on that, by the way, he needs taking down a peg or two.”</p><p>“You know he’s probably still listening in,” I pointed out.</p><p>“The guy has an inside line to my entire stream of consciousness,” he reminded me in turn. “Even if I didn’t say it, he would hear it.”</p><p>“Oh, right.” I pursed my lips. “Does that ever... bother you? That he can do that, I mean? Or what any of them can do.”</p><p>Beau shrugged. “Maybe a little in the beginning. But I got used to it quickly. It’s just a fact of life for the Cullens – Edward knows what you’re thinking, Edythe knows what you want, Alice knows what you’re going to do next and Jasper knows how you feel about it all. When you’re around them enough, responding to it is second nature. Besides, it wouldn’t do me any good if I <em>did </em>have a problem with it. None of them can exactly turn off their talents. I can roll with it or I can be uncomfortable, and I know what I prefer.”</p><p>“I guess that makes sense,” I agreed. “So that was all she told you?”</p><p>“Pretty much. She had some commentary on the proceedings, but I don’t think you need to hear that.”</p><p>“I want to,” I insisted. “I know it’s kind of cheating to ask, but I want to know what she thinks of me too.”</p><p>He smiled with an indulgent air that I didn’t altogether appreciate; it made me feel like a naive child.</p><p>“Edythe really likes you, Bell, you have nothing to worry about on that front. She was mainly complaining about her brother being an idiot and sabotaging his own happiness, stuff like that.”</p><p>I was sceptical of that. “The implication being that <em>I </em>could make him happy.”</p><p>Beau tipped his head to the side and frowned. “You don’t think so?”</p><p>I gave him a ‘duh’ look. “He’s <em>him </em>and I’m <em>me</em>. How in the world am I ever going to be enough?”</p><p>Now he was looking at me like I was crazy, and I didn’t like that anymore than I had the previous smile. “Were we listening to the same conversation? Because I didn’t get word for word but what I heard made it sound like he was pretty invested in spending time with you. Or does ‘you have become incredibly precious to me,’ have a different meaning to you?”</p><p>I raised an eyebrow. “Not word for word, huh?”</p><p>“Don’t avoid the question. You don’t think any of last night suggested that he was interested in you?”</p><p>“Maybe for now,” I allowed reluctantly. “He’s definitely curious and weirdly protective, but he’s not mentioned anything beyond that as far as I can tell.”</p><p>Beau shook his head at me, sighing in obvious exasperation. “How can you be so smart and so dumb at the same time?”</p><p>I pushed him hard in the shoulder, catching him off guard and making his whole chair tip before he recovered. “Mean!”</p><p>He went to push me back, but I was expecting it and hurried out of my chair, leaving him and the whole unsettling conversation behind in the kitchen as I went to get my bag for school. I was afraid he would bring it back up in the truck, but he must have sensed I wasn’t quite ready yet and let me drive in silence.</p><p>School that day dragged even more than usual. Despite the fact that I knew better, a tiny part of me still kept hoping that I would turn a corner and see Edward coming the other way. I reflexively scanned the cafeteria at lunchtime, knowing I wouldn’t find what I was looking for but too ingrained into the habit now to stop myself from doing it anyway. I forced away the disappointment, and though it made me feel queasy again, I made sure to buy a normal lunch, knowing that it wasn’t healthy not to eat properly every time he was out of my sight; I had never particular cared about my weight, but I’d always been slight and I was well aware that I didn’t have a lot of pounds that I could safely lose.</p><p>When I made it to our table, my heart sank further into the pit of my stomach at the first glance at Tyler’s eager expression. The Cullens could not come back to school soon enough for me – I needed Edythe’s deflection abilities, although I would definitely prefer the privacy of a table shared with Edward, far away from all other irritating boys, my brother included. I braced for impact as I sat down.</p><p>He didn’t pounce immediately; the conversation at the table was focused on the dance, allowing me to easily remain out of it and eat my food in relative peace. But then things circled around to tonight’s shopping trip and what sort of outfits everyone was planning to look for. McKayla was giving Jeremy very strict instructions on what flowers <em>not </em>to include in the corsage he was getting her, the poor boy looking rather like a deer in the headlights but obviously eager to please. While everyone else was distracted, Tyler leaned over to me.</p><p>“Any ideas what colour you're going to go with for your prom dress, Bella?” he asked, smiling like we were discussing some sort of grand conspiracy.</p><p>“Um... no?” I said, so confused that it came out as a question. I was about to say that I probably wasn’t going to prom either, but he ploughed heedlessly ahead.</p><p>“It’s just that if I’m going to invest in a tux for both occasions, which is my plan, ya know, gotta make the old allowance stretch as far as it can, I want to make sure I get something that matches. At least get the same colour tie or something like that.”</p><p>I gave him a blank look.</p><p>“I thought girls liked to coordinate their outfit with their date,” he explained, like I was missing this very obvious point.</p><p>“I’m sorry, what?” I spluttered, completely aghast.</p><p>“You know, to make the pictures look good and stuff,” Tyler went on, finally starting to look concerned. “But if you don’t want to do that, that’s cool too. I’ll just get plain black, so it’ll match anything.”</p><p>I couldn’t respond the way I wanted to, my brain so beyond overwhelmed by the fact that Tyler did genuinely think we were going to prom together, just like Beau had predicted. Was the boy actually delusional or just that eager to make up for the van incident?</p><p>My brother, thankfully, was both listening in and more switched on than me. “Dude, where have you got this idea that you’re going to prom with my sister?”</p><p>Tyler now looked properly perplexed. “I asked her, and she said yes. Don’t start getting all brotherly and protective on me now, man, we’ve been friends long enough for you to trust me.”</p><p>“I didn’t!” I objected more vociferously than I meant to, then clarified when he turned his confused gaze on me. “I didn’t say I would go to prom with you.”</p><p>“Yeah, Ty, I was there, remember?” Beau chimed in. “You asked her to the Spring Dance, she said she was busy, which you knew about because you said so, then you said ‘okay, we’ll do prom instead then’ and just walked away.”</p><p>“Seriously Tyler?” Erica joined in, appropriately horrified, which certainly made me feel a whole lot better. “In what universe is that how you ask a girl out?”</p><p>McKayla made fervent noises of agreement, and even Angela nodded slightly. Jeremy looked like he was taking mental notes, and Logan was glaring at me again.</p><p>“I’m paraphrasing a little,” Beau admitted. “But that was pretty much it.”</p><p>Tyler looked uncomfortable with being ganged up on. “I guess I didn’t think about it, really. My dad always says confidence gets results so...” He looked at me again, a light of hope coming back into his eyes. “Hey Bella, I know it’s early, but do you want to go to prom with me?”</p><p>Had this happened a week ago, I might have tried to find a nice way to respond, or maybe even asked for time to think about it which I would actually use to formulate a plausible excuse. But it was happening today, the day after I had come to the realisation that I was head over heels in love with a mythical creature who made Tyler – who wasn’t exactly ugly, by any means – look like a cave troll in comparison. Said creature was also about ninety-nine percent certain to be listening in to the conversation right at this very moment. I wondered how he was reacting to what was happening; was he as horrified as I was? Did he care at all? That was obvious – even with the doubts I’d expressed to Beau this morning, he clearly cared, on some level, the least at this moment. But was it as much as me? Was I alone in my hopeless infatuation? And more to the point, would it last once he’d satisfied his curiosity and realised how uninteresting I was?</p><p>One thing was for sure. The Tyler Situation needed more decisive handling.</p><p>“No, Tyler,” I told him firmly.</p><p>He looked so disappointed that I almost relented and tried to soften the blow, but once again Beau intervened. His hand came down heavily but reassuringly on Tyler’s shoulder.</p><p>“Bad luck, man. But you know what they say, there’s plenty of fish in the sea. You’ll find the right girl for you eventually.”</p><p>“Or guy,” I chimed in, unable to stop myself glancing over at Logan.</p><p>McKayla giggled. “Yeah, right. That would be so weird.”</p><p>“Not really,” I argued, annoyed again by her attitude on this particular topic. “You can’t make assumptions about that kind of thing, Kay. And I don’t think it matters who people choose to date as long as they’re happy.”</p><p>McKayla conceded with poor grace, Tyler looked incredibly uncomfortable, Logan looked like he wanted to strangle me, and Angela had the presence of mind to change the subject. While we all discussed our Macbeth papers (a few people panicking over how far they were from being done with less than a day to go) I sat back in my seat and took a figurative step away from the conversation. I volunteered my essay topic when asked, prompting several blank looks and an approving nod from my brother, then went back to my abstraction, trying to imitate the trademark Cullen undirected stare and careful not to look at Logan or Tyler in particular.</p><p>Biology passed slowly, sat alone at my lab table. I found myself doodling very familiar pairs of eyes in the corner of my notes. Part of me wanted to scribble them out – I certainly didn’t have the skill to do justice to the real thing – but it felt wrong to erase them like that, so I left them alone. It was oddly comforting, like he could actually see me through them. What a hopelessly sappy idea; I was starting to reel from how completely my thought process had changed in under twenty-four hours.</p><p>Gym was okay, another introduction lecture, this time on badminton. As I was leaving the locker room on my way to meet Beau and head home, I was already thinking about what I could say to convince Edward to come into my room again tonight. We would be dumping our stuff and heading straight back out as soon as we got home, to give us as much time in Port Angeles as possible before our various school night curfews took effect. I wouldn’t be able to invite him in until we got home, and his note had said I wouldn’t see him until tomorrow, but I was reasonably confident that I could change his mind if I could just work out what to say. I was so engrossed in my thoughts that I didn’t even realise I was being approached until hard hands were abruptly yanking me into an empty corridor just past the boys’ locker room. For half a second, my heart raced with excitement – had Edward changed his mind and snuck into school to see me? – but that was all the time it took for me to recognise the person who had grabbed me. It was Logan, and he looked furious. Not a patch on Edward’s fury, of course, but certainly frightening enough in its own way; the pounding in my chest didn’t slow.</p><p>“Logan, what-" I began, but he cut across me in a hard, angry voice.</p><p>“What are you trying to do, huh? You want to embarrass me in front of everyone? You think it’s funny or something?”</p><p>I was so taken aback I could barely respond. His hand was still tight on my arm and I whimpered just slightly at the pain.</p><p>“Logan, you’re hurting me,” I protested, hating how weak and scared my voice sounded.</p><p>He laughed harshly. “<em>I’m </em>hurting <em>you</em>? Do you have any idea what will happen to <em>me </em>if people find out my secret, you bitch? I don’t even want to know how you found out, but you cannot tell anyone, you hear me? I swear to God, I will kill you if you do.”</p><p>He shook me once but thankfully let me go. I rubbed my arm and glanced around to see how close help might be if I needed it. He had someone found a corner that no one was passing by; he was between me and the route to the parking lot, and I was pretty certain the hallway behind me led to a dead end. Though I was completely terrified, I squared my shoulders, tried to remember what self-defence techniques I knew, and matched his anger with as much calm conviction as I could muster.</p><p>“I’m not trying to out you to everyone,” I told him firmly. “I won’t claim to be any kind of expert, but I do know that would be an awful thing to do. I worked out the truth on my own, because it was the only explanation I could think of for how annoyed you always are with me when I haven’t done anything to you. So, let me make something very clear to you. I have absolutely no interest in Tyler whatsoever, which you would probably have realised yourself if you could stop being petty and jealous for five seconds and actually pay attention to the fact that it’s always him bugging me. I wish he would leave me alone, but I like to think I’m the sort of decent person who considers other people’s feelings before they fly off the handle at them just for being annoying. You are obviously hurting and I’m sorry for that, but it doesn’t give you an excuse to act like a <em>dick.</em>”</p><p>I didn’t swear often, so it surprised even me to hear that word come out of my mouth. Logan was certainly startled and had taken a big step back from me. I kept going, wanting to make my point and also hoping he would continue moving back so I might have the space to attempt an escape.</p><p>“I understand that the kids here are not exactly open to the idea of same sex relationships. I can only imagine what the adults are like. But the fact is, you’re gay and that’s not going to change. The decision you have to make now is how you deal with that. I’m not saying you have to come out tomorrow, that’s your choice and you should only do it when you feel ready. The way I see it, you can get out of here in what, a year and a half? Just get through to graduation and then you can fly off to college in New York or San Francisco or somewhere else where you’ll find people who don’t give a rat’s ass who you want to sleep with. You can surround yourself with those people and maybe finally get to feel good about yourself. In the meantime, you can go around repressing how you feel and being angry and bitter and lashing out at people for things they can’t control, or you can spend the time you have left here doing some serious self-evaluation and coming to terms with who you are, so you’re ready to accept all those people who want to accept you. I know this won’t mean much coming from me, and that’s fine, you can keep hating me all you want, I don’t care. But Logan, I want you to know that there is nothing wrong with you. You are not dirty or weird or broken or anything that you or anybody might have told you about yourself. All those people you’re afraid of, the people who would hurt you if you came out, they don’t matter. <em>They </em>are the ugly ones, because they can’t see how amazing you are.”</p><p>Logan blinked a few times. I knew how he felt – I hadn’t even known I had that kind of a speech in me.</p><p>“You don’t know anything about me,” he muttered stubbornly after a moment.</p><p>“No, I don’t,” I agreed. “I barely know you. But I know you deserve to be happy and loved. I know you deserve to feel safe and not to have to hide any part of yourself. I know that because that’s what everyone deserves, no matter who they are. The choice is yours now, Logan. Make it carefully.”</p><p>I took a chance and swerved round him, still afraid that I would feel the clamp of his hand on my arm again. But he let me go; when I turned around at the end of the hallway, he hadn’t moved an inch. I broke into a run, stumbling slightly a few times but making it to the parking lot without incident. I was shaking by the time I found Beau, the terror finally setting in now that I had let go of the anger and forced confidence. My brother looked genuinely scared when he saw me and wisely guided me straight to the truck. I could feel eyes on us from every direction, but I couldn’t muster enough presence of mind to care. I was dimly aware that I was probably going into shock.</p><p>When we were safely ensconced in the cab of the truck, Beau took both my hands in his and forced me to face him.</p><p>“What happened? Are you okay?”</p><p>Haltingly, the shivers making me stumble over almost every word, I recounted the last five minutes back to him. I wasn’t really thinking about what I was saying, the words coming out robotically as I tried to calm the terror still thumping in my veins. For the moment, I was disconnected from my retelling and all its attendant emotions – I had to be, or I would lose it. Still, when I finished, my cheeks were wet with the tears I had started quietly crying without noticing. Beau dug a lightly crumpled tissue out of his pocket and offered it to me. I wiped my eyes hurriedly and took a deep, shuddering breath. My brother looked like he was wrestling with some pretty big emotions of his own, though his were leaning more in the direction of anger than mine.</p><p>“Do I need to have words with him?” he said through gritted teeth. “Because that was not okay, Bella. You know that right?”</p><p>“I know,” I assured him. “Please, just leave it alone. He’s struggling enough already.”</p><p>Beau shook his head at me. “I swear to God, you’re too nice for your own good. I’m genuinely concerned that it’s going to get you badly hurt one of these days.”</p><p>I smiled weakly. “Now you sound like Edward.”</p><p>Which reminded me that there was a high chance that <em>he </em>had heard everything that had happened, or my retelling at the very least. I wondered about his reaction. I thought I knew what it might be, but I still wasn’t one hundred percent certain of his feelings. Would he be as angry as Beau was? Worse, maybe? Or would he dismiss it as human foolishness? Would he want to comfort me, soothe me like my brother did? I didn’t know. For all we’d got cleared up the night before, there were still a lot of questions I was wary of asking, in case I scared him off. More importantly, his answer might not be what I wanted to hear.</p><p>Beau’s mind had clearly gone to at least a similar place, if not the exact same one. He glanced reflexively across the tree line across the parking lot.</p><p>“Well, Logan’s dead,” he muttered. “That’s a shame, he’s a pretty decent friend when he’s not being an asshole.”</p><p>I tipped my head to the side. “What makes you say that?”</p><p>He looked at me like I was crazy. “You think Edward is going to let him get away with treating you like that? You’ve seen him when he’s angry. I’m honestly still not convinced I shouldn’t pummel Logan over this, and you’re just my sister. Edward is going to be a thousand times worse.”</p><p>I shook my head. “I really think you might be overestimating how much he cares. Honestly, it wasn’t that bad.”</p><p>“Isabella Marie!” He was exasperated now, and definitely still annoyed if he was full naming me. “You are literally shaking, probably in mild shock. This is not nothing.”</p><p>“Let it go, <em>Beaufort Geoffrey</em>,” I insisted, leaning into his name and making a conscious effort to stop the shivers. I was starting to calm down and actually feeling better with every moment that passed – ribbing my brother was definitely helping. “Please, let’s just get back to the house and dump our stuff. I want to go have a nice time with our friends and forget this ever happened.”</p><p>He looked like he didn’t want to end the conversation, but something in my eyes must have convinced him that he was about to hit the brick wall of my stubbornness, so he just sighed and started the truck.</p><p>We drove back to the house in silence and quickly dropped our bags in our rooms. I switched to a smaller purse that I could still carry my wallet and phone in; when I came downstairs, Beau was sliding his own things into his back pocket. I envied the ease with which boys could get ready for a shopping trip and silently cursed the universal evil that was the pocket sizing on women’s clothing. A horn honked from outside and we hurried out to meet Jeremy, who was picking us both up. Erica was already in his front seat; McKayla was collecting Angela and Tyler and meeting us there.</p><p>The Port Angeles trip was mostly uneventful. Boys and girls went their separate ways almost as soon as we arrived; the guys needed to get tuxes and Jeremy at the very least had  to order a corsage, while we made a beeline for the one department store in town for dresses and accessories. McKayla kept up a steady stream of gossip while we shopped, mainly trying to get Angela to admit who she had wanted to ask to the dance and teasing me about Tyler’s prom plans. I was very firm on my stance that I was not going with him, or anyone else for that matter, and tried to help Angela out by deflected Kay whenever I could, commenting on a dress or pulling one of them away to look at other things. I let Erica talk me into buying a necklace that I probably shouldn’t have wasted money on, given that I would have no occasion to wear it in the near future. But I thought the delicate circular sapphire pendant might go nicely with my favourite blue blouse. The copper setting and chain also reminded me of a certain someone’s hair, and I just couldn’t resist.</p><p>When I’d heard about the trip, I’d had an idea that I could slip off alone at some point and try to find a bookstore. However, when I’d mentioned that plan to Beau in the car, he’d informed me that the only place he knew in Port Angeles was a new age hippie place which wouldn’t have anything of interest to me, so I didn’t bother.</p><p>All the time we were out, I found I was hyper aware of what I said and did. Knowing that Edward was watching and listening in, I felt oddly comforted, but also worried that he would see something I didn’t want him to. I also began to wonder what he might be hearing in the minds of my friends around me, how they were responding to me and what that might do to his impression of me on top of the actions themselves. All the time, there were the memories of the conversation in the hallway with Logan circling in the back of my mind, along with Beau’s assertion about the intensity of Edward’s likely reaction.</p><p>We met back up with the boys for dinner at a little Italian place on the boardwalk. Beau, clearly still trying to lift my spirits after earlier, made a stupid joke about the name – La Bella Italia.</p><p>“Hey sis, think they’ll give us a discount since you own the place?” he smirked.</p><p>I wasn’t the only one who groaned.</p><p>“Beau, that was awful,” I complained.</p><p>“Truly terrible,” McKayla agreed.</p><p>Jeremy snickered. “I think you just lost a lot of people’s respect there, dude.”</p><p>Beau pouted dramatically. We were all still laughing at him as we walked into the restaurant. Dinner was good, not spectacular but my mushroom ravioli was decent. Beau, far less picky about his food, made various happy noises as he inhaled his seafood linguini. The others all seemed fairly satisfied too. Chatter flowed freely around the table; the only exception was Tyler, who still seemed a little uncomfortable around me and had deliberately seated himself at the other end of the table. I wasn’t about to complain about that.</p><p>After we’d eaten and gone through the predictable rigmarole of splitting a restaurant bill between seven teenagers, all paying in cash and a few needing separate receipts to show to overly suspicious parents, there was a short debate about going to catch a late movie. In the end, though, too many people had to be home, and no one that was able to stay out could agree on what they wanted to see anyway, so we all piled back into the cars and got on the road for the hour long drive back. Beau continued to chat with Erica and Jeremy, while I sat back in my seat watching the world go by. The trees flashed past, gradually growing darker as the sun set. In the midst of the forest, the sky wasn’t as easy to see as it was on the vast plains of Phoenix. Still, the blue melted into a red-orange blaze, gradually growing pink-tinged over the treetops and darkening into purple, deep blue and finally black. By the time we were pulling up outside our house, the moon was glowing and stars twinkled, not interrupted by the insidious light pollution of the big city that I was used to. I stood on the driveway as Beau said his goodbyes, offering only a distracted wave myself, looking up at the bright pale-yellow circle, not quite full just yet but getting there. Charlie had left the porch light on for us and the little house was more inviting and welcoming than I had ever found it before. Despite myself, I was getting used to Forks, and definitely not hating it. Though it was admittedly a lot to do with Edward, I also had to concede that he wasn’t all that I was appreciating about small town life.</p><p>“Think you’ll have another visit tonight?” Beau asked casually as we fell into step, walking up the driveway.</p><p>“I don’t know,” I answered honestly, then added with a sly grin, “Will you?”</p><p>He smirked. “Probably. Want me to send her up to read you a bedtime story if Edward doesn’t stop by?”</p><p>I flicked his ear and strode ahead. He was laughing as we got inside and hung up our jackets. Charlie came out of the living room, an amused smile on his lips.</p><p>“You’re in a good mood, kiddo,” he commented. “You guys have a nice time?”</p><p>“It was fun,” I said, and was surprised to find I wasn’t lying. “The girls got some nice dresses.”</p><p>“I think Jer nearly had an aneurism over those flowers,” Beau added, chuckling at the memory. “But we got there in the end.”</p><p>“I’m glad you enjoyed yourselves. Thanks for that meatloaf you left in the fridge, Beau, it was great.”</p><p>My brother shrugged. “No big deal, it was in the freezer and needed using up anyway. I’ll still cook tomorrow, okay Bells?”</p><p>“Sure,” I agreed, not about to argue with another night off cooking. “But right now, I think I need to head for bed. That shopping took more out of me than I realised.”</p><p>I yawned theatrically, and I knew Beau wasn’t buying it. Charlie, on the other hand, waved me up the stairs and wished me goodnight without the least suspicion.</p><p>I hurried through my bathroom routine as much as I could and returned to my room feeling ready to face whatever was coming. I mentally ran through my ongoing list of questions, deciding which ones I might venture asking tonight. There were still several that were borderline terrifying in the uncertainty of their answers, but I knew I would have to get to them soon, so I tentatively resolved to ask a few, provided the right situation came up, of course.</p><p>Back in my room, I slid up the window that I’d reflexively closed that morning.</p><p>“I know you said tomorrow,” I softly told the trees. “But you’re welcome to come in if you want to.”</p><p>Unlike last night, I decided not to watch the window. There wasn’t the same uncertainty there had been last night, but at the same time I didn’t want to be disappointed if he decided to stick to his guns about not seeing me until tomorrow, or if he wasn’t there, which was still entirely possible. Instead, I set about putting my phone on to charge, moving my wallet back to my school bag and finding a home for my new necklace. I didn’t have much in the way of jewellery and I didn’t have anywhere in particular to keep it. As I crossed to the dresser where I kept a small mirror and a few keepsake boxes, I took the necklace out of its little velvet bag, stroking the delicate chain and rubbing the pendant gently between my thumb and index finger.</p><p>“That’s very pretty,” Edward’s soft voice sounded from over my shoulder. I didn’t jump at the suddenness of it and was irrationally proud of myself for that fact.</p><p>I looked up, into the mirror, into the reflection of his eyes. He was every bit as breath-taking as always; more frequent exposure was apparently not having much of a desensitising effect. Once again, there was a palpable rush of something undefinable when I saw him, like the lack of him all day had left a gap in me that was suddenly filled back up with his presence. I couldn’t have stopped the soft smile on my lips if I’d tried.</p><p>“Thanks,” I said, setting the necklace down and turning to face him properly. “And thanks for coming in. I wasn’t sure if you would.”</p><p>He shrugged, the motion not exactly suiting him – too casual by far. “You asked me. Besides, I wanted to check on you after... earlier.”</p><p>I studied his face more closely and realised that what had appeared at first glance to be a blandly pleasant expression held distinct tightness around the corners of his eyes and mouth. As I watched, he gave up on the pretence and frowned with an air of distress. For one of only a handful of times that I could remember since we’d met, Edward approached me of his own accord.</p><p>“Are you alright?” he asked worriedly, gesturing to my arm where Logan had been gripping it. In the hours that had passed, I had barely thought about it; I glanced down, glad that I was in a tank top tonight, so I didn’t have to wrestle with a sleeve to see if I had a bruise or something. There was no mark that I could see, and it didn’t hurt any more. As for the sting of the words... I knew they had come from a place of pain and fear and weren’t really meant for me.</p><p>“I’m fine,” I told him honestly.</p><p>His frown deepened minutely, like he didn’t believe me. He took another step closer, putting us as near as we had been in that long, intense moment last night, when the epiphany of my love for him had hit me so forcefully. My heart reacted to his closeness which made him look more wary somehow. He swayed slightly, then leaned a little closer.</p><p>“May I?” he asked on a breath, reaching out toward my arm again, not a point this time but an intention to touch. I couldn’t catch my breath to answer, so I just nodded.</p><p>Slowly, gently, like he was afraid I would break, Edward brushed his fingers over the skin of my upper arm. Electricity zinged through me from every point of contact between our skin. My already disrupted breathing hitched audibly, and his fingers halted in response. Our gazes locked, just like last night, dark brown to warm gold. Finally, unbelievably, I saw in the depths of his eyes every emotion I was feeling, reflected back at me with as much, if not more intensity. Any doubt I was still holding onto over his feelings was dispelled in an instant. I wasn’t what you would call experienced when it came to boys, but there was no mistaking <em>that </em>look.</p><p>“Satisfied?” I breathed with absolutely no volume whatsoever.</p><p>“No,” he answered honestly. “But it’s good to know that idiot didn’t do any serious harm.”</p><p>His expression turned murderous and, his perusal complete, he went to move back. Impulsively, I brought up my hand and caught his fingers. He froze for just a spilt second but didn’t attempt to retrieve his hand or move any further away.</p><p>“Was Beau right earlier?” I wondered, striving for casual but definitely too breathless to make it convincing. “Should I be warning Logan to watch his back, or keeping an eye out for sudden unexplained homicides in the news?”</p><p>Edward gave me an arch look. “You think I would be sloppy enough to leave a body?”</p><p>I shrugged. “I don’t know how it works. But you didn’t answer my question.”</p><p>He sighed heavily. “Part of me really wants to. When it was all happening, it was all I could do to keep from racing in and breaking his hand right then and there. My sister kept me contained... just about.”</p><p>I winced, able to imagine more vividly than I would like to exactly what he was describing. “Poor Logan.”</p><p>“Don’t worry,” he reassured me, twisting his hand slightly so his thumb could run a soothing pass over my knuckles; the motion made my hand tingle. “You pleaded his case fairly convincingly, and I must admit, you more than held your own. I was pleasantly surprised.”</p><p>I smiled. “What can I say, I have hidden depths.”</p><p>“You certainly gave him a lot to think about.”</p><p>I hummed in agreement, then began to gently move around him to sit on my bed. I was prepared to let go of his hand if he pulled away, but he let me tow him by the fingers and sat down beside me. It was the closest we had sat next to each other in a while, since our last Biology class together, almost a week ago now. I started playing idly with his fingers, observing the long, delicate shape of them, the way his hand didn’t seem to have as many creases as mine, or at least ones that weren’t as deep. He let me peruse in silence for a while, before finally stepping in.</p><p>“Do you have more questions tonight?” he asked, a gentle invitation.</p><p>I pursed my lips bashfully and gave him an apologetic look. “I think I might always have questions. Do you mind?”</p><p>“Not at all,” he assured me, venturing another comforting swipe across the back of my hand. “I... I like this. Having you know about all this, I mean. It’s something of a relief, I suppose.”</p><p>“No more maddening hints,” I commented.</p><p>“No,” he agreed with a slight chuckle. “No more keeping you up at night.”</p><p>“At least not in that way,” I added breezily, then turned crimson as the potential implications of <em>that</em> sank in. Where was all this confidence coming from all of a sudden?</p><p>There was a look on Edward’s face now that made it seem like he should be blushing too, but he stayed as white as ever.</p><p>Before he could say anything, I jumped in. “I like it too. I’m glad you feel like you can trust me now. Although I guess it’s a little forced.” I started feeling uncertain again. “You know, since I found out on my own. It’s not like you have much choice.”</p><p>He sighed and shook his head slightly, not looking unhappy exactly – more resigned. “I think I have to admit that my siblings were right, and all of this was pretty much inevitable after my stunt with the van. Edythe told you about their bet?” When I nodded, he went on. “You may be interested to learn that none of them believed you wouldn’t find out eventually. It was only the timing that was in question. I suppose that means they had more faith in you than I did.” He looked somewhat shamefaced at that.</p><p>I offered my own comforting thumb stroke, though the position of our hands meant mine swept across his palm. My skin was still tingling, but the shock of the first spark had subsided. “It’s okay. I’m sure you’ll find a way to make it up to me.”</p><p>“I will try,” he said, far more seriously than I thought the conversation warranted. I was beginning to get the impression that Edward took everything more seriously than other people, and I couldn’t decide yet whether that was a good or bad thing. Circumstance dependent, I supposed.</p><p>“You had questions?” he prompted after a few comfortably quiet seconds. I tried to choose one to start and went with I hoped was a relatively easy question.</p><p>“Can I ask how old you are?” I ventured tentatively. Maybe vampires, like most women over thirty, disliked being probed about their real age.</p><p>“I’m seventeen,” he replied breezily, almost automatically. I could tell he was usually very good at keeping up the facade. Without the van incident, only my obsessive attention to detail when it came to him would have been enough to let me know there was something different. This answer was a half-truth, and I wasn’t going to let those slide any more.</p><p>“How long have you been seventeen?” I pressed.</p><p>There was a long pause before he finally sighed and admitted, “A while.”</p><p>It was something, but not quite enough for me. “And how long is a while, exactly?”</p><p>“You’re persistent tonight, aren’t you?” he griped without any real anger.</p><p>I just arched one eyebrow at him and waited.</p><p>Edward watched me very carefully as he spoke, obviously analysing my reaction; in return, I was very conscious to keep my face smooth.</p><p>“I was born in Chicago in 1901, and I haven’t aged since 1918.”</p><p>My preparation worked, and I held in my shock. Honestly, it wasn’t as bad as I was expecting. A part of me had been imagining he would be hundreds of years old. Just over a century was far easier to swallow. My mental image of Edward in the age of letter writing resolved; it would have been a fountain pen, probably a gift from a proud parent for some achievement at school, and he would have worn a suit with a stiff pointed collar and a tie, perhaps a cravat on special occasions. Looking at him to compare now, I realised suddenly that I had never once registered what he was wearing – too caught up in his face and all its mysteries. He had on a simple long-sleeved t-shirt and jeans, nothing fancy but clearly very good quality. His shoes had the distinctive star of the Converse logo just barely showing below his jeans, as opposed to my own knock-off tennis shoes. He wore no jacket, and I supposed that with as cold as his skin was, he probably didn’t feel low temperatures in the same way. I knew that the cold of his skin against mine should probably be bothering me, but there was no way I was letting go any time soon.</p><p>He was studying my hand as I processed the latest revelation. His fingers were tense with anticipation, but what was he expecting? Fear? Revulsion? Rejection? None of them had crossed my mind. All I could think of was how many things suddenly made sense about him – not just the antiquated speech patterns, but the world-weariness, the sense that he had seen too much, felt too much and done too much, not enough of it positive to keep from damaging his worldview and making him jaded. He had lived over a hundred years, and there were moments when you could see every one of them in his eyes. I felt a surge of pity. Without thinking about it, my free hand came up and stroked across his cheek, curling gently around his jawline.</p><p>In a flash, he was gone. One of my hands was abruptly empty, the other hanging in space, the face it had been trying to cradle having disappeared. I looked wildly around my room, disoriented enough that it took me a moment to find him. The apology was already on my lips, but it got caught in my throat when I saw him at the window, trying to push his way out but stopped by something.</p><p>“Move,” he growled fiercely. The sound made me shiver; I had never heard him sound so... vampiric was the only word for it. I was glad his back was to me, because I really did not want to see the expression that accompanied it.</p><p>“Edward,” came Edythe’s soft, calm voice from beyond the window frame. “You don’t want to do this.”</p><p>“Move, Edythe!” Edward insisted, somehow more angrily than before.</p><p>“No,” was her mild reply.</p><p>“E-Edythe,” I stuttered, not quite sure whether I was part of the conversation anymore. “If he doesn’t want to stay-"</p><p>“Oh, but he does want to, Bella,” she said, cutting me off. She climbed gracefully through the window, forcing her brother to step back. It was incredible to watch little Edythe, who really was no bigger than me, pushing against tall, surprisingly solid Edward and actually making some headway. He snarled at her viciously, apparently angry beyond words. She didn’t seem at all phased, arching an eyebrow at him like he was a toddler having a tantrum and she was just waiting for him to get it out of his system.</p><p>“Now you’re just being rude,” she admonished him gently. “Please stop, you’ll only end up looking more foolish.”</p><p>There was a very long, tense moment as the two siblings stood toe to toe, staring each other down, murderous fury up against complete nonchalance. It seemed like some kind of silent conversation was going on and I realised that with the abilities Edythe has described, that was completely within the realm of possibility. Finally, Edward took a deep, slow breath through his nose. Then his shoulders slumped, his expression calmed, and his eyes closed.</p><p>“There,” Edythe said, sounding subtly triumphant. “Doesn’t that feel better?”</p><p>“You are playing with fire, sister,” he replied, his voice still holding a hint of a threat.</p><p>“I’m not doing anything,” she shot back breezily. “Except keeping my idiot brother from spoiling a beautiful moment.” She turned to me. “Allow me to apologise on my brother’s behalf, Bella. I would say it’s exceptional behaviour, but unfortunately it really isn’t. And I’m sorry for intruding without invitation.”</p><p>“It’s... fine,” I said weakly, still trying to recover my own equilibrium. “But really, if this is too much... I don’t want to cause any more problems.”</p><p>They both shook their heads firmly.</p><p>“You aren’t doing anything wrong,” Edward assured me, the self-loathing back again. “You were only doing what came naturally. You should be able to do that sort of thing without having to agonise over it first. With anyone else, it wouldn’t be an issue.”</p><p>“But I don’t want to be with anyone else.” It was my turn to be forceful now.</p><p>“And that’s my cue to leave,” Edythe said, turning back to the window. “Try that again, brother, and the Aston Martin gets a new paint job.”</p><p>He glared at her retreating back. “You wouldn’t dare.”</p><p>Her only answer was a somewhat ghostly cackle as she disappeared back into the darkness.</p><p>Another long silence descended in the wake of her departure. This time I broke it.</p><p>“I mean it. I don’t care what special considerations I have to make. I don’t mind being careful or going slow or whatever it takes. Just tell me how to make this work. No matter what, I want <em>you</em> here. No one else.”</p><p>Edward’s eyes were pained. “I can’t tell you how much it tears me apart to hear you say that. It makes part of very happy, happier than I thought was possible. But I can’t get rid of the side of me that says this is all a very bad idea.”</p><p>I stood up, moving cautiously closer. When he didn’t bolt, I took another step forward, so close that I had to tilt my chin up to see his face properly.</p><p>“Do you think you can give it just a little more time before you make up your mind? Give me a chance to learn the rules?”</p><p>He thought for what felt like an incredibly long time. Then he nodded, slowly, but firmly.</p><p>“I think I can do that. Can I ask for something in return?”</p><p>“Anything,” I promised, perhaps rashly. Last time I’d promised him something without knowing what it was, I’d ending up getting laughed at. But this felt different.</p><p>The side of his mouth lifted ever so slightly. “Tomorrow, can I ask the questions?”</p><p>That surprised me a little. “What do you have to ask about?”</p><p>“Everything.”</p><p>His voice was intense and made me a little nervous. His eyes blazed, full of fervent curiosity, and though I couldn’t imagine what he would want to know, I couldn’t deny him. Especially if it got him to give us a chance.</p><p>“I suppose it’s only fair for you to get a turn.”</p><p>His proto smile widened. “Thank you.”</p><p>Tentatively, still clearly nervous though it no longer showed on his face, he offered his hand again. I took it eagerly but gently so as not to startle him. Our fingers curled together again, and the same thrill went through me. I was watching our hands, following his thumb as it glided across my knuckles again, so I didn’t see, only felt, when he leaned in and softly kissed my forehead. I stayed absolutely still, drinking in the moment, happy to let him take the lead for just a little while. I was sure I heard him breathe in the scent of my hair.</p><p>“Ah,” he sighed, pulling back. I looked up to see him smiling, finally looking happy and peaceful. “I don’t think this will be so hard again.”</p><p>“I’m glad.”</p><p>Edward nodded very slightly. “Are you ready to go to bed?”</p><p>I thought about that. A few of my questions had been answered without me having to ask, but there was one I was still curious about.</p><p>“Is it okay if I ask one more question? I think I know the answer, but... I guess I need to hear it?” I made a face; I wasn’t explaining myself clearly at all.</p><p>He smiled wider, and I knew I wasn’t imagining the indulgent tilt to it. “You can ask as many as you would like. I’m warning you now, you won’t get any in tomorrow.”</p><p>That made me feel nervous, but I decided it was Future Bella’s problem for now.</p><p>“Well, I guess it’s that diet question that we keep circling around.”</p><p>Edward’s face turned serious. “Ah, that one. We haven’t talked about it properly, have we?”</p><p>“No,” I hummed. “I mean, it doesn’t really matter to me. I know why you feed from animals, I know what you’ve said about still wanting human blood, but I’m still sort of trying to picture it. You said you were out hunting animals this weekend?”</p><p>“We were,” he confirmed. “We had a very successful trip, especially by Eleanor’s standards. We found quite a few bears.”</p><p>I remembered that McKayla had mentioned the area around Goat Rocks had a lot of bears, but the confirmation that that was on the menu, for lack of a better phrase, was still startling.</p><p>“Is that... something you like?” I asked tentatively.</p><p>He shrugged noncommittally. “I don’t mind them, but they’re more Ellie's preference. They do make a nice change from elk and deer, which is our usual fare when we can only hunt closer to home. We generally have to roam a bit to find the good game.”</p><p>“Do you have a... preference?”</p><p>“I like mountain lions, when I can get them.” He was watching my face carefully as he spoke, probably trying to gauge my reaction again. “That isn’t very often though, and we have to be careful not to have too big of an impact on local ecosystems.”</p><p>I couldn’t claim to be an expert on hunting, but I knew a bit from listening to Charlie and his friends. My dad preferred to fish, but I knew quite a few of his colleagues had gun licenses which didn’t just cover the firearms they carried for work. “I guess you have to pay attention to what’s in season and stuff, right?”</p><p>Edward chuckled slightly. “Actually, we pay more heed to the conservation organisations than the hunting regulations. The laws only cover hunting with weapons, after all.”</p><p>I frowned. “How to you hunt a bear without a weapon?”</p><p>In response, he flashed his teeth. “Let’s just say our weapons are a little more... unconventional. Not the sort of thing the parks service considers in their legislation.”</p><p>I shuddered very slightly, but I was overwhelmingly curious. “Can I see you hunt sometime?”</p><p>Abruptly, he was angry, teeth gritted and expression edging on murderous again. “Absolutely not.”</p><p>I winced at the low growling undertone of his voice and looked down, feeling like a chastised child. I tried to pull my hand away, but he held onto it, a gentle yet firm pressure.</p><p>“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” he said softly, full of contrition. “But when we’re hunting... there’s no control in that moment. I’m all instinct, all reaction to my senses, especially smell. If you were anywhere around me in that state...”</p><p>“Bad things,” I finished for him. “Never mind then. I’m sorry for asking.”</p><p>He shook his head. “It’s alright. You’re allowed to be curious, Bella. Anyone would be in your position.” His head tipped to the side and his eyes unfocused a little, then he smiled slightly. “Our siblings are eavesdropping again. They would both like to reassure you that Beau asked all the same questions and got roughly the same answers.”</p><p>I felt myself turning pink at the idea of Beau and Edythe listening in. “Well, that’s going to get old really fast. How do you put up with it?”</p><p>Edward shrugged. “Over eighty years without anything resembling privacy? We all have very sensitive hearing, being listened to or overheard is just something we’ve all had to get used to. Besides, I’m far worse. Even at a distance where I can’t hear people speaking, I can often still hear their thoughts. Edythe needs visual contact for her ability but she’s long past being shy about using it. The others are all very used to having the two of us thoroughly embroiled in their business, especially Carine since she’s known us the longest. Add Alice and Jasper to the mix and there’s no hope for anyone. We agreed on having no secrets some time ago.”</p><p>I smiled just a little at that. “Beau and I promised no secrets too. Although, I guess this whole situation has proved we <em>can </em>keep things from each other, when we want to.”</p><p>He hummed. “You didn’t tell him about the van. I’ll admit, I thought you might. So did he, actually, he was rather disappointed when you didn’t.”</p><p>“You asked me not to,” I pointed out. “And he didn’t tell me about Edythe and the rest of you, which I sort of get, although he did mention there was people who would cause trouble if they we knew, which I don’t fully understand. Someone’s going to have to explain that to me at some point.”</p><p>“Of course. Perhaps not tonight though? It’s rather a long story.”</p><p>“Alright,” I agreed. “I do think we need to find some way of having these conversations in private though. I’m not going to be able to forget that they’re listening now.”</p><p>Edward huffed a little laugh. “That may be a losing battle, I’m afraid. But on that note, I was going to ask you something, if I may.”</p><p>“Of course, what is it?”</p><p>“Are you set on going to Seattle on Saturday, or do you mind if we do something else?”</p><p>My interest was well and truly piqued. Part of me had genuinely forgotten our plans for the weekend. “What did you have in mind?”</p><p>“The weather is going to be nice again, so it’s better I stay out of human sight. You could stay with me, if you want.”</p><p>Two weekends of sunshine in a row – that had to be some kind of record for Forks.</p><p>“Just us?” I confirmed.</p><p>He took it differently than it was meant. “Your brother and my sister could join us if you prefer. If that would make you feel safer. I understand that being completely alone with me might be-”</p><p>I cut him off. “No, no! Didn’t I just say I wanted to get away from them? I’m not afraid to be alone with you, if that’s what you’re thinking.”</p><p>He looked suddenly very unhappy. “You should be. I’m really not safe for you, Bella.”</p><p>I shook my head firmly. “No, we’re done with that now. We’ve covered this already. You’ve had more than enough opportunities to snap or whatever, and you haven’t.”</p><p>“That doesn’t mean that I won’t,” he argued. “The future is never certain, Bella. Being Alice’s brother has taught me that much.”</p><p>I reached up to touch his face again, and this time he didn’t pull away. “Please, try to have the faith in you that I do. If you can’t, that’s okay, I get it. I mean, we barely know each other in the grand scheme of things. But I know that when I’m with you, what you might do to hurt me is the last thing on my mind.”</p><p>He still looked upset, but he leaned just slightly into my hand. “What I wouldn’t give to see inside that mind, just for a moment. Maybe I would have your faith, if I could hear it for myself. Regardless, I will do my best to have a more positive outlook. I make no promises, you understand?”</p><p>I nodded, happy with this compromise, and dropped my hand. “I do. And yes, I’m okay if we do something else on Saturday. Only...”</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>“Can I drive? If we’re not going as far as Seattle then your carbon footprint argument isn’t as big a deal, right? And Charlie will be fishing, but I told him I was taking the truck and if he comes home early and it’s there...”</p><p>He was amused now. “You don’t want to tell him that you’re out with me? He does know me already, and he would hardly object. Not without knowing the truth, of course.”</p><p>“He likes your family, and he certainly has a soft spot for Edythe,” I allowed, intentionally ignoring his last comment. “But I think it might be a bit different with me. I hate to accuse my dad of having double standards but... well, I just think he might have a bit more of an opinion on who his daughter dates than his son. Less is more with Charlie – what he doesn’t know, he can’t worry about.”</p><p>Or tell my mother about, I added mentally. I had never realised before living here just how much my parents shared with each other. I supposed it was because I was here now and Renée was checking in on me, but I wondered if they had always called each other so often to swap stories. It was almost enough to make me wish they didn’t get on so well.</p><p>Edward thought about my words for a moment. “You make a valid point. I confess I’ve observed a frightening overcompensation when it comes to some men and their daughters. They can struggle to see them as more than the little girls that they remember from their childhood. All the same, if this is something you want to last then he’s going to have to be introduced to me at some point. As more than Edythe’s brother, that is.”</p><p>My heart soared at the idea of what ‘this’ could entail, and how long it might last, not to mention the potential extent of ‘more’. “True, but... maybe not this Saturday? Or, you know, completely out of the blue and likely to give him a heart attack.”</p><p>“Not to worry,” he said with another indulgent smile. I knew those ought to make me feel patronised or pandered to, but for some reason I didn’t mind them. “I won’t cause your father any undue stress. I’ll concede to taking the beast this weekend.”</p><p>It looked like the idea physically pained him, and I couldn’t help being a bit indignant on the truck’s behalf.</p><p>“It is not that bad. Don’t forget, it came out of its tussle with Tyler’s van nearly unscathed.”</p><p>“Please, don’t remind me,” he said with a martyred look. “I’m still haunted by that godforsaken accident.”</p><p>“Don’t be,” I insisted. “I’m okay, and if you think about it, <em>that</em> led to <em>this</em>.” I squeezed his marble-hard hand. “I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty happy about that.”</p><p>That got me the smile back. “I can’t say I object.”</p><p>We stood in silence for a minute, just looking at each other with soft smiles, until a huge yawn split my lips and made him laugh.</p><p>“Alright,” I said when I had control over my mouth again. “I think I’m ready to sleep now. Will you read to me tonight?”</p><p>“If you would like me to.”</p><p>In response, I just went to my bedside table where he’d carefully placed the book when he left last night. I didn’t let go of his hand, and though I couldn’t claim to be strong enough to make him move like his sister had, he followed along behind me once again. I handed him Austen and reluctantly let go at last to climb into bed. He stayed close tonight, not crossing to the rocker but settling onto the floor, leaning against the side of the bed, one arm up on the bedspread about at the level of my waist, one knee bent up and the book balanced by the corner on top of it. As he began to read, picking up from chapter two of <em>Pride &amp; Prejudice </em>(though I was still fairly sure I hadn’t been awake for that much) I slowly and carefully reached out, making plenty of noise gliding my hands across the covers and giving him ample time to move away. When he didn’t, I summoned my courage and gently threaded my fingers into the hair at the crown of his head. He paused in his reading for half a second, then went on. I stayed still and listened for about a minute before I started tenderly running my fingers through the remarkably soft copper strands. So we stayed, him quietly reading while I caressed his hair, as my eyes grew heavier and fell closed. I felt my hand go still, resting on top of his head, but he kept reading.</p><p>Finally, when I was right on the edge of unconsciousness, there was another cold brush across my forehead, and the richest voice whispering, “Sweet dreams, Bella. Until tomorrow.”</p><p>I think I hummed in agreement, but before my brain could process the sound to be sure, I was asleep.</p><p>Wednesday dawned blessedly, beautifully clouded. What a difference a weekend could make; I was as happy to see grey skies that day as I had been about the sunshine on Saturday, perhaps even more so. This was more than a little day trip. This was the return to rightness of all aspects of my life. I just knew school would be significantly more bearable with him there.</p><p>I was practically bouncing down the stairs and Beau was grinning at me all morning but didn’t make a comment. Unfortunately, we’d both somehow managed to sleep in and were running late, so we didn’t have the time to discuss any of last night – namely, the small matter of boundaries. I still hadn’t forgotten Edward’s comment about eavesdropping.</p><p>The first shock of the day came when we left the house. We were in a rush, Beau making a beeline for the truck while I stopped to hurriedly lock the door. I was halfway down the driveway, double checking that my English paper was definitely in my bag for about the fourth time, when I walked straight into his back; he’d stopped dead.</p><p>“Beau!” I complained, stepping around him. “A little warning maybe?”</p><p>Then I saw what he’d stopped for, and my ire faded. Parked behind the truck against the curb was the familiar silver Volvo and leaning on the doors with matching amused expressions were Edward and Edythe. Both my brother and I were staring at them, probably with our own matching looks of complete dumbfoundedness.</p><p>“Good morning,” Edward called when it was clear neither of us were going to start the conversation. Edythe waved, then skipped lightly up the drive to meet us; Edward ambled closer in a much more sedate manner.</p><p>Edythe pecked Beau on the cheek. “Why so startled, love? I texted you that we were coming.”</p><p>Shaken out of his freeze, Beau fumbled in his pocket for his phone, then turned pink when he checked it. “So you did. Sorry, I missed it, we’ve been in a mad rush this morning.”</p><p>She laughed at him, though not unkindly. “Well then I guess we’d better get going if we want the monster to get us to class on time.” At his thoroughly perplexed expression, she elaborated. “You’re giving me a ride this morning, silly.”</p><p>“If you don’t mind riding with me,” Edward chipped in, addressing me. I couldn’t quite tell from his face whether that was what he wanted or not. My mind was made up pretty quickly – any excuse to spend more one on one time with him was something to take advantage of without hesitation.</p><p>“Sure,” I replied, thankfully recovered enough from my shock to sound breezy and unaffected. I turned to Beau. “See you in English?”</p><p>He had calmed down too, giving me a smile as he threaded his fingers through Edythe’s.  “Yup, see you there.” He started tugging her towards the truck. “Is this repaying all those free rides from last year?”</p><p>“It’s a start,” she shot back cheekily, leaning into his side, then gracefully accepted the hand up into the cab that she probably didn’t need while he held her door for her, the perfect gentleman. Had I not had the last two evenings under my belt, I might have felt jealous of them and their ease around each other, given how rife with tension things still were between Edward and me. Even now, he was leaving a few feet between us. But instead, I just felt hopeful. Though no one had said so in as many words, I could only imagine that once upon a time, Edythe and Beau had been similar to us. I knew there had been a lot of the same questions, but perhaps there had also been the same caution and tentativeness, worries about how far to push and exactly what questions were okay, concern about revealing too much. Edward had mentioned that Edythe had faced censure from the family, which he was apparently getting too. Now though, my brother and his girlfriend were completely fine. One day, maybe we would be the same.</p><p>‘One day’ was still far away at the moment, so it was with a distinct air of shyness that I turned to Edward. Somehow, despite the confidence I was managing to project when we were face to face, every time I was away from him, I still worried about what I would be faced with when we saw each other again. I was beginning to trust that I could keep him reassured when I could speak to him, but when he was away from me – and worst of all, when I was asleep – there was nothing I could do to mediate whatever wild anxiety trip his brain decided to take him on. This morning though, he seemed calm enough.</p><p>“Shall we?” he asked pleasantly, gesturing to his car. I realised that the truck was already roaring away, and I hadn’t moved.</p><p>“Let’s go,” I agreed.</p><p>He held my door, checking that I was situated before he closed it. Then he was around to the driver’s seat before I could get my seat belt on. The inside of the car was a little too warm; looking at the dash I saw that the heat had been cranked all the way up. I remembered my thought last night about him not feeling temperature in the same way and wondered why he’d done it.</p><p>“Can I turn this down?” I asked as he twisted the key in the ignition, indicating the heat dial.</p><p>He looked a little surprised, then concerned. “Is it set wrong? I don’t usually use it, but I didn’t want you to be cold.”</p><p>My heart melted a little at that. “Thank you. It’s warmed up plenty though, it can stand to be turned down some.”</p><p>“Then please, be my guest. Whatever makes you comfortable.”</p><p>As he pulled away from the curb, the low purr of his car’s engine a stark contrast to the noise that I was used to, I twisted the dial until it was just past the midpoint, not quite enough to make the AC kick in, but the vents stopped blowing out hot air. I cracked my window open to help things cool down a little more.</p><p>Edward looked embarrassed. It was an odd look that I wasn’t used to from him; he was usually so confident. “I’m sorry. Edythe tried to tell me it was too much, but I was being stubborn.”</p><p>I giggled a little, easily able to picture that exchange. “It’s okay. It was good of you to think of it.”</p><p>He smiled bashfully. We were moving quickly through town and I wouldn’t be surprised if we passed the others before we got to school.</p><p>“So, how did you spend the rest of your night?” I asked after a moment.</p><p>His smile turned into a smirk. “Oh no, it’s my turn for questions today, remember?”</p><p>I made a face. “Right. I have no idea what you want to know. It’s not like there’s anything special to unravel about me.”</p><p>That comment got me a look of his that I was getting very familiar with – the incredulous one that said, ‘are you crazy?’ as plainly as if he’d actually said it out loud. Of course he was far too polite for that... most of the time.</p><p>“I beg to differ. There is a lot about you that I want to figure out.”</p><p>“Like what?”</p><p>“What’s your favourite colour?”</p><p>The question was so unexpected that I actually laughed out loud. But he was waiting patiently for a genuine answer, so I pulled myself together and told him, “It changes a lot, pretty much every day.”</p><p>“What is it today?” he pressed.</p><p>I thought about it, willing to play along if this was really the sort of thing he wanted to know. “I’d have to say brown.”</p><p>Edward raised an eyebrow at that. “Brown?”</p><p>“It’s warm,” I explained. “And it reminds me a lot of stuff that I miss from home. There’s too much green around here, it covers all the brown stuff.”</p><p>He hummed. “You’re right, I suppose. I do agree that brown is warm.”</p><p>His hand reached out and caught a curl of my hair, twisting it through his fingers like he had the other night. I took the chance to run my own fingertips over the back of his hand. He was watching me a bit too closely for my liking, considering he was driving, but his eyes had returned to the road before I could prompt him.</p><p>“What music do you like?” was the next question, delivered with all the sincerity and seriousness of a criminal interrogation.</p><p>“All kinds of stuff. Some classical, but you knew that already. I’m not really a bubble-gum pop sort of girl but there’s some half decent stuff on top forty. I prefer more indie bands, I guess.”</p><p>He asked me about specific groups and artists, and I rattled off a few names off the top of my head. We were pulling into the parking lot and, as I’d predicted, the truck was nowhere in sight, although I couldn’t recall passing it. Glancing at the clock, I saw I was no longer late. Edward manoeuvred skilfully around the other cars and students, taking a spot next to a flashy car that I had never seen before. It was bright red, very new looking, a convertible – completely impractical in Forks weather – and already garnering curious looks and envious stares from the people around us, mostly boys.</p><p>“Who’s is that?” I asked.</p><p>Edward looked annoyed. “Rosalie’s. The others had to drive themselves today. What CD do you have in your stereo right now?”</p><p>The abrupt subject change was slightly jarring, and I had to think for a minute before I realised I’d never taken out the album I was playing on Saturday night. I told him the name and he grinned, then popped open a compartment in the centre console that had a few dozen CD cases crammed inside. He pulled out exactly the same album, still smiling.</p><p>“First Debussy, now this. We have something else in common.” The idea seemed to make him happy. I rather liked it too.</p><p>A roar behind us alerted me to the arrival of our siblings. The truck pulled into the space on the other side of us, sandwiching us between it and  the shiny red car. I got out while Edward stowed the CD and the four of us gathered on the sidewalk.</p><p>“Sounds like you’ve been abusing the beast,” I commented to Beau with just a hint of reproach. “That was definitely a worse noise than it usually makes.”</p><p>Beau held up his hands in surrender and pointed one finger down at Edythe. “She made me.”</p><p>Edythe stuck her tongue out at him. Somehow even this most juvenile act seemed graceful and pretty when she did it. “It’s so <em>slow</em>. I don’t know why you won’t let me buy you something new.”</p><p>Beau moved his hands down to his hips and arched an eyebrow at her. “You want to explain that to Charlie?”</p><p>Even I cringed at that idea.</p><p>“Speaking of making a scene...” Edward chimed in, jabbing his thumb over his shoulder at the red car. “Any idea how that happened?”</p><p>Edythe sighed heavily, a long-suffering expression on her face. “I told them they could take my car. But you know Rose, any excuse to show off and make her displeasure known at the same time. She’s just being petty.”</p><p>“Why does she ride with you at all if she has that?” I asked. Edward had claimed today as his day for questions, but I had no such deal with his sister.</p><p>“We try to stay inconspicuous,” she explained, her wry look making it clear she knew it wasn’t working. “But we all like to go fast, when we can.”</p><p>“Pro tip: never watch the speedometer while one of these two is driving,” Beau advised, his tone somewhere between a good-natured tease and a genuine warning. “I about had a heart attack the first time we drove to Port Angeles. What were you at, Edythe, about 110?”</p><p>My eyes bugged out of my head. “Holy crow! What is wrong with you?”</p><p>Both Cullens groaned audibly.</p><p>“Not you too,” Edward complained. “I’m going have to keep it under 80 when you’re in the car, aren’t I?”</p><p>“Maybe try under the speed limit?” I offered pointedly. “Traffic laws exist for a reason, and we were raised to obey them.”</p><p>“Yeah, you’re out of luck on that, Edward,” Beau added. “Bells is more like Charlie than I am. Always a stickler for the rules.”</p><p>I punched him lightly in the arm. “Shut up, idiot, you’re not exactly laid back.”</p><p>“Tell me about it,” Edythe said, the martyr returning.</p><p>Beau didn’t respond in words, just pulled her into a tighter hug and stole a kiss, then started leading the way towards the buildings. It was like the other morning all over again – the happy couple leading the way while Edward and I trailed behind. Except today we were a solid half foot closer to each other. Today, I wasn’t annoyed and confused, and he wasn’t being infuriating. He threw a few more questions at me while we walked, mundane things about movies and books. I answered quickly and honestly, but I was getting distracted. As we walked, it was as if we left some kind of protective bubble. I’d been focused only on the four of us and our conversation. If I was being honest, I hadn’t really paid much mind to anyone else for the last two days. Now, I was realising that there were eyes on us – a lot of them. I spotted McKayla and Jeremy standing by the rarely used picnic tables between the cafeteria and the parking lot; Jeremy’s eyes looked they were about to fall out of his head and McKayla’s jaw was practically on the floor. I cringed, just knowing that I was in for a far less welcome interrogation as soon as she got me alone.</p><p>“What are you thinking?” Edward asked, studying my expression.</p><p>“It’s nothing,” I tried to deflect him. “Nothing important, anyway.”</p><p>“I wish you wouldn’t do that,” he complained.</p><p>“Do what?”</p><p>“You act as if your thoughts aren’t worth sharing, that they haven’t any significance.”</p><p>I arched one eyebrow at him. “I take it you disagree.”</p><p>“Emphatically,” he confirmed. “I always want to know what you’re thinking. It’s still very frustrating not to hear it for myself.”</p><p>I laughed. “You know most people have to get by like that all the time.”</p><p>“Oh, I’m very aware of that. It’s painful to listen to.”</p><p>“Well, I do tell you what I’m thinking more often than not.” I made a face, remembering the number of times that the sheer force of his eyes had had me blurting out truths I’d never shared with anyone, even Beau.</p><p>“You edit.” It came out like an accusation.</p><p>“Not a lot,” I insisted, deciding not to let him know just how much of an impact he could have on my equilibrium.</p><p>“Enough to drive me insane. Or you deflect and change the subject, like you’re doing now.” He gave me an arch look. “So I ask again, what thought had you looking so perturbed?”  </p><p>I pursed my lips and considered not answering; we were almost at English, and I could just walk away if I wanted to. But something in his eyes told me he wasn’t going to let it go and I would only be deferring the conversation until later.</p><p>I sighed. “We’re just attracting a lot of attention, that’s all. McKayla is going to want to know every detail, and I don’t know what I’m telling her.”</p><p>He hummed, giving that point some serious thought, his head titled to the side and his eyes ever so slightly unfocused. Was he listening to her, picking out her mental voice among hundreds to see what she would ask?</p><p>“Any chance of a heads up?” I asked. “You know, on what exactly she’s going to ask?”</p><p>Edward smiled, his eyes dancing with amusement. “Now who’s looking for an unfair advantage?”</p><p>I shrugged. “I have to use what resources I have at my disposal. No sense in wasting it. So?”</p><p>“She has some speculation about whether we’re dating, and how long for. And she wants to know how you feel about me.”</p><p>I blanched. I was not ready for that question. My feelings had certainly been solidifying over the last few days and the revelation of my love for him had settled from the lightning bolt of realisation into a warm certainty. But I wasn’t ready to talk to <em>him </em>about that yet, never mind putting it in teenage girl appropriate terms that wouldn’t make me look crazy or obsessive.</p><p>“What do I say?” I wondered out loud.</p><p>“Well, yes, to the first part, if you don’t mind of course.” He looked calm, but there was a nervous slant to his eyes. I realised that this was his way of genuinely asking if I wanted to go out with him. I smiled and nodded, my heart fluttering happily.</p><p>“For the length of time, I would keep it vague, just say it’s new. She saw us getting closer last week so it shouldn’t be too much of a shock. And the third point...”</p><p>We stopped outside my English class. I was dimly aware of our siblings saying their goodbyes on the other side of the door, using their lips for something other than talking. Edward reached out and twisted a strand of my hair back into the messy bun I’d thrown it into in my rush to get out the door. I shivered slightly as his fingers brushed my neck. The crooked smile that I was becoming increasingly attached to appeared, one side of his mouth curling up.</p><p>“I’ll be listening for the answer to that one,” he said in a low, intense voice that made my breath catch in my throat. Then he turned abruptly and walked away, throwing a casual, “See you at lunch,” over his shoulder. Several people walking past stopped in their tracks, watched him for a few seconds before turning shocked, searching gazes on me. I felt my cheeks go pink and hurried into class. Beau followed a moment later, his goofy grin firmly in place. We were just settled into our seats when, as if on cue, McKayla slid into the row in front of us, her eyes eager and burning with curiosity.</p><p>“Oh. MY. God. <em>SPILL</em>.”</p><p>I sighed and prayed I could pull this off. “About what?”</p><p>She looked exasperated. “You are not playing dumb with me right now. <em>Edward Cullen </em>drove you to school.”</p><p>“No, really?” I said, leaning heavy on the sarcasm; I’d found in the past few months that it could go over the heads of some of my new friends. “I thought I just teleported here.”</p><p>“Bella!” she whined. “Come on, give me something. Did you ask him to pick you up?”</p><p>“No, it was a surprise,” I told her honestly, ignoring the way my brother was shaking with silent laughter next to me. I tried to subtly elbow him in the ribs but came up short – he was too far away.</p><p>My transparency disappointed McKayla, but she wasn’t deterred.</p><p>“So, are you like, boyfriend and girlfriend now? Is there some adorable twin thing going on?”</p><p>“Edythe and Edward aren’t twins,” I pointed out, obviously stalling.</p><p>She flapped one hand dismissively. “You know what I mean, now answer the question before I explode!”</p><p>I shrugged. “We haven’t used <em>those </em>words, exactly.” Those big, scary, important sounding words that seemed at the same time far too small for what was going on between us. “But he offered to drive me to Seattle on Saturday to spare the truck, which I guess counts as a date?”</p><p>I made it a question on purpose, deferring to her expertise on the matter of all things boys. No need to mention that he had changed the plan. I made a mental note to ask him exactly what we were doing instead, when I was allowed to ask questions again.</p><p>“Absolutely!” She was clearly extremely satisfied with that response. Then she started flapping her hands rapidly, as if trying to swat a persistent fly.</p><p>“Have you kissed yet?” she asked in an excited stage whisper.</p><p>“I’ll take ‘Things I don’t need to hear about’ for five hundred, Alex,” Beau piped up, only half kidding, I could tell.</p><p>“You are not part of this conversation,” McKayla snapped, waving him away.</p><p>“No, it’s not like that,” I answered her question. She deflated disappointedly.</p><p>I set about organising my stuff; Ms Mason had just come in and she was always eminently punctual. Unfortunately, she didn’t immediately call the class to attention and McKayla wasn’t done yet.</p><p>“When did you guys even start talking?” she wondered, suspicion returning. “I mean, before last week you hadn’t talked since the accident, right?”</p><p>“I guess he changed his mind and wanted to get to know me better. Don’t ask me why,” I said honestly. “Look, Kay, it’s all very new, okay? We’re still figuring things out.</p><p>“Alright, I get it, I’ll butt out... for now.” Her scheming expression promised future inquisitions. “You like him though, right?”</p><p>“Yes,” I admitted, dropping down to a whisper as Ms Mason called for quiet. “A lot more than he likes me.”</p><p>She gave me an appropriately sympathetic look but was kept from further comment by the start of attendance, turning around to face the front. Beau nudged me slightly and when I glanced at him, he was frowning. I gave him a quizzical look. In response, he reached over and quickly scrawled <em>Not true</em> in the corner of my notebook.</p><p>I stared at the words for a few moments, considering what they might mean. Ms Mason's voice just about penetrated my distraction and I answered to my name and started to take notes reflexively, but I wasn’t really listening.</p><p>Not true. A deceptively simple statement with enormous implications. Beau clearly believed that my feelings and Edward’s weren’t as unbalanced as I was certain they had to be. Of course, I knew that he cared, that was no longer really in question. But how could my brother be right? How on earth could someone like Edward be as hopelessly obsessed with me as I was with him?</p><p>There was a lull in Ms Mason’s lecture as another student asked for clarification on a point and I took the opportunity to scribble my reply.</p><p>
  <em>How do you know?</em>
</p><p>I tapped my pen twice against the corner of my notebook, simultaneously aiming for subtlety and hoping my brother would see. I had struck the right balance; he glanced down, but no one else seemed to notice. He gave me a look that said ‘really?’ as clearly as if he’d spoken it out loud, then reached across to add his next contribution.</p><p>
  <em>It’s obvious. Open your eyes.</em>
</p><p>What exactly was that supposed to mean? I couldn’t help feeling insulted – did he think I was being deliberately obtuse about the whole thing?</p><p><em>What am I looking for? </em>I wrote, indulging him if only to figure out what the hell his point was.</p><p>He just rolled his eyes and shook his head. <em>Too much to write. Tell you later.</em></p><p>Well, that was frustrating. Why did all the men in my life suddenly feel the need to be so cryptic and evasive? Charlie was fairly straightforward at least. God help me if he started prevaricating too.</p><p>I wanted to argue, but Ms Mason had started circling the room as she read aloud dramatically from her copy of <em>The Canterbury Tales </em>and I was afraid she would see us. I folded over the conversation, hoping it looked like I was simply marking a place in my notes, and refocused on the lesson as best as I could.</p><p>I wasn’t able to catch Beau alone to have the ‘later’ discussion for the rest of the morning. We were surrounded by our friends as we walked to Government and then went our separate ways from third hour. In Calculus, Jeremy nervously asked me if McKayla had said anything about their date on Monday night; I vaguely remembered her doing some gushing about it on the shopping trip and was able to give him enough of a positive report to make him smile and look pleased with himself.</p><p>In Spanish, I started to get nervous. Edward had said he’d see me at lunch, but did that mean he would be joining our group today? Would he be waiting at a table on his own again? I didn’t think for a moment that he would want us both to sit with his siblings, given how he was apparently in several of their bad books at the moment. He had said they all agreed it was inevitable that I would find out the truth, but I didn’t fool myself for a moment into thinking that meant they were okay with it.</p><p>More to the point, would he still be asking questions? And if so, what in the world would they be about?</p><p>As we filed out of the classroom – running late as usual – there seemed to be a lot of commotion at the door. People kept stopping, making others plough into them and start arguing. Yet every conversation seemed to die as soon as they reached the exit. Jeremy and McKayla, walking hand in hand in a decidedly showy way, were right in front of me and turned to glance over their shoulders when they saw whatever it was. Jeremy looked perplexed, but McKayla was smug and knowing. I hurried through behind them to see what all the fuss was about.</p><p>Edward was leaning casually against the wall just opposite our Spanish room, drawing stares but ignoring everything around him like the people weren’t even there. When he saw me, his mouth pulled up in that beautiful half smile and I felt something in me melt.</p><p>Jeremy opened his mouth, probably to ask a question, but McKayla cut him off by starting to hurry away, dragging him behind her like a dog on a leash.</p><p>“Have a good lunch, Bella!” she called out in a significant tone as she left.</p><p>I felt the blush warming my cheeks as a few people turned to stare at me, their attention drawn by her decidedly not quiet voice. Trying – but not really succeeding – to blank them all the way he did, I crossed the hallway to meet Edward.</p><p>“Hi,” I said shyly, feeling apprehensive already. Would he want to ask me about my conversation with McKayla? He’d warned me that he would be listening.</p><p>“Hello,” he replied, still smiling. “How was your morning?”</p><p>I shrugged. “Same old, same old. Yours?”</p><p>“The same. Shall we?”</p><p>He gestured in the direction of the cafeteria, and we started walking. People were still very much staring, more so as more and more classes let out for lunch. Whether to distract me or simply because he wanted to get on with his inquisition, Edward started asking me more questions. He wanted to know about places where I had been and where I wanted to go in the future. He seemed mildly aghast when I admitted I’d never left the country, or really the western states for that matter. The stream of queries continued into the line for food, and it wasn’t until we were nearly at the register that I realised how much he had put on the tray.</p><p>“Is that all for me?” I asked him in hushed tones. Perhaps he was overcompensating again, like with the heating in his car this morning.</p><p>He arched an eyebrow and smiled very slightly. “Of course not. Some of it is for me.”</p><p>He’d paid before I could get my wallet out of my bag, waving off my protests, then led the way towards the tables. My hope for another private lunchtime was realised; he bypassed my group’s table and didn’t go anywhere near his siblings. McKayla had obviously filled everyone in, because there was a note of expectation in the shocked looks from Angela, Erica and Tyler. Logan glared at me as usual for half a second, before I saw Edward’s head twist just slightly in his direction. The next moment, Logan was looking the other way and Edward was continuing to walk as if nothing had happened. My brother was looking smug again, smirking as he lolled back in his seat with his arm around Edythe. He winked at me as we passed, and I rolled my eyes back. Edythe offered me an encouraging smile, which I returned. Perhaps out of habit, I glanced over at the other Cullens at their usual table. They were doing their everyday routine of staring at nothing in particular, apart from Rosalie, who was shooting daggers at Edward. It was a look that seemed like it should do actual damage with how fierce it was, but he was pointedly ignoring her. As I watched, she began to turn away, stymied, then clearly realised I was watching her and redoubled the glare on me. I was far more affected by her fury than her brother had been; I cringed away from the look, reflexively tried to hide behind my hair, then realised it was still tied up and, distracted, caught my toe on the linoleum, stumbling slightly. Edward reached out, apparently on instinct, and steadied me before guiding me gently into a seat at the nearest mostly empty table. The seniors at the other end of it stared at us but hurriedly turned away at a glance from Edward, and they were too far away to listen in to any conversation we might have.</p><p>“Are you alright?” Edward asked, the picture of concern as he sat down opposite me.</p><p>I nodded mutely, not entirely sure I was being honest. In an effort to regain some composure, I took a deep breath and sat up a bit straighter, tucking the one loose strand of hair behind my ear.</p><p>“Ignore her,” Edward advised, pointedly doing so himself. “Like Edythe said this morning, she’s annoyed and lashing out. It’s nothing personal.” He slid the tray towards me. “Help yourself to whatever you’d like.”</p><p>“I know it’s not my day, but can I ask just one question?” I pleaded.</p><p>He sighed like it pained him, just a hint of apprehension in his eyes, and held up a single elegant white finger. “Just one.”</p><p>“Can you actually eat food? I mean, I know you guys buy lunch every day, but I’ve never seen you eat any of it.”</p><p>He made a face. “You don’t want to hear about that, especially when you <em>are </em>about to eat.” He pointedly pushed the tray closer to me again. “Please.”</p><p>I picked up a slice of pizza and took a very ostentatious bite, chewed and swallowed. “I’m not squeamish. Tell me.”</p><p>Edward shook his head at me and mumbled something that sounded distinctly like, “Impossible.” Then he squared his shoulders a bit and spoke at a normal volume.</p><p>“Mechanically speaking, yes, I can eat. I can bite and chew and swallow, but after that, it doesn’t... go anywhere, if you catch my drift. It has no nutritional value. Besides which, most of the processes and systems of the human body have shut down for us, including digestion.”</p><p>I understood what he was saying. “So it just sits in your stomach?”</p><p>“Precisely,” he said with a nod, then a cringe. “It’s a very unpleasant state to rectify.”</p><p>I decided against daring him to take a bite of my pizza and took one myself instead. He watched the motion with very thinly veiled disgust.</p><p>“Why bother buying lunch then?” I wondered. “If you aren’t going to eat it, it seems like a terrible waste of food and money.”</p><p>He shrugged one shoulder. “We have to keep up appearances. Would it make you feel better to know that our groceries go to the food bank in Port Angeles?”</p><p>“A little bit,” I admitted. “This is still too much food for two people, by the way. Let me get my own lunch tomorrow.” I grinned. “I’ll teach you some portion control.”</p><p>“Duly noted. Is your curiosity satisfied?” he asked as I finished the slice and reached for a blueberry muffin.</p><p>“For now. Is yours?”</p><p>He smirked. “Not even close.”</p><p>With that, he launched right back into the questioning. I couldn’t imagine what he could be gaining from some of them – they just seemed completely random. Perhaps there was some importance that I couldn’t understand without the benefit of years of hindsight. The alternative explanation was that he really did care about my favourite shampoo scent and the meals I least enjoyed cooking. He seemed particularly fascinated by the rant about complicated food prep that resulted from that line of questioning. Despite all the food he’d bought, I barely had time to eat with the amount he was having me talk. I didn’t like how much was looking set to go straight in the trash untouched, so I made sure to pocket a few of the more portable items for later. If I didn’t eat them, Beau certainly would – the boy was a bottomless pit when it came to food.</p><p>All the way through lunch, the questions continued, picking up speed. It was starting to feel like a game of word association, like I had to say the first thing that came to mind, which had the potential to be very dangerous indeed. When I didn’t have time to think about my answers, I was far more likely to say something stupid. The dazzling quality of his perpetually curious gaze wasn’t helping either.</p><p>Finally, he stopped and stood.</p><p>“We should get going,” he commented, sounding only mildly disappointed. “We’re going to be late.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Chapter 11: Complications</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Bella and Edward continue navigating the changes in their relationship.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*peaks out* So, um... hi!<br/>I know it has been a very long time since I posted, I am so sorry for the wait and so grateful for all of your patience. Life happened a lot and this chapter just would not come together in places, but I'm pretty happy with it now and I hope it was worth the wait.<br/>Enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>We walked side by side to Biology. He'd stopped asking questions, at least for the moment, which was both a blessing and a curse. While it gave me a break from the onslaught, the lack of distraction allowed me to become aware once again of the amount of people watching us. McKayla, walking about ten paces ahead of us with Angela, kept turning back to look over her shoulder in a way that was obviously meant to be surreptitious, but which was completely failing. Edward seemed not to notice, so I tried to ignore it too; after the fourth or fifth time, Angela said something to her in a low voice and she finally stopped.</p>
<p>When I glanced up at Edward, he had that slightly unfocused look on his face that I was learning was a sure sign that he was listening in to someone's mind. My own curiosity was well and truly piqued, and I couldn't help asking, "So what's the verdict?"</p>
<p>He blinked once, startled, and then his expression turned confused as he looked down at me. "What?"</p>
<p>"What are people thinking about us?" I clarified. "You know, so I'm prepared for any future interrogations."</p>
<p>He made a face. "You don't want to hear it. No, you don't <em>need </em>to hear it."</p>
<p>"I do," I insisted. "Please, I'd rather know. I'm only going to imagine it's much worse than it is if you don't tell me."</p>
<p>He didn't look at all happy about the prospect of revealing what he knew, but he was wavering ever so slightly. Taking a risk and hoping it would pay off, I looked straight into his eyes (praying silently that I didn't trip while I wasn't watching where I was going) and said, "Please," in my most persuasive voice, the type that I used when I was trying to get Beau to do something.</p>
<p>It worked. I could tell he was still reluctant, but he sighed heavily.</p>
<p>"Most of it is fairly predictable. People are surprised and they want to know how this happened. There's a lot of wild speculation, and some of it is close to the truth. The boys in particular are doing a good deal of..." He cringed. "Visualising."</p>
<p>No need to ask him to clarify what he meant by that. There was a tension in his shoulders that had been lacking for most of the morning. When I looked down, his hand was balled in a tight fist at his side, just like the day we met. Like that day, I sensed the thinly veiled fury that he was holding back. Whatever it was that people were thinking was clearly bothering him.</p>
<p>I reached down and gently, tentatively, brushed my fingertips against the back of the clenched fist. "I'm sorry."</p>
<p>The fingers flexed, then relaxed. Looking up again, I saw him watching me with a startled, perplexed expression. "Why are you apologising? It isn't your fault that teenage boys are so horrendously disrespectful inside the privacy of their own heads."</p>
<p>"I know," I assured him. "But it's obviously upsetting you, and I'm sorry for that. I wish you didn't have to hear it."</p>
<p>His face took on a note of what I could only describe as wondering which made me faintly uncomfortable. I felt the blush rising and hurried to try and change the subject.</p>
<p>"Anything less... explicit?"</p>
<p>Edward didn't seem completely distracted from the unpleasant images he was seeing, but he did answer the question. "McKayla is analysing everything we do ready to give you a rundown as soon as you ask her for it. There are a lot of comparisons being made to romantic comedies." That at least made him smile slightly, an amused tilt to his head. "Angela is surprised but pleased for us, that's refreshing."</p>
<p>"She's nice," I agreed, and he hummed.</p>
<p>"Yes, a very restful mind, I've found. I preferred looking through her when I was keeping tabs on you the other night."</p>
<p>I made a face. "I'll be honest, that's a little creepy."</p>
<p>"Sorry," he said, not sounding it at all, and returned to the original point. "Really, most of it is typical baseless small-town gossip. It probably doesn't help that I've always been so distant. You're the first girl any of them have seen me take an interest in."</p>
<p>A happy, bubbly feeling fluttered in my stomach at that. I knew there was no chance that he hadn't had an interest of some kind in someone over the many years of his life, but it was still nice to hear that I was at least the first one in a while.</p>
<p>We had reached Biology by this point and I could feel the eyes of the entire class on us as we walked to our lab table. While not as numerous as the watchers in the halls, our classmates were no less impactful in their stares, both subtle and decidedly not. When we sat down, Edward didn't angle his seat away from me and sit as far away as he could, like he had every day for the last two months. Granted, he didn't shift the stool any closer to me, but he didn't move it away either. We were as close as we'd been in my bedroom, our arms almost touching where they rested on the desk. Feeling bold, I stuck out my pinkie finger and poked the back of his hand. He smiled warmly and poked me back. My heart soared.</p>
<p>"What do our brothers and sisters think?" I asked, realising suddenly that these most crucial opinions had not been part of his little roundup.</p>
<p>My question made his smile twist and I nearly regretted it, but I was too curious to feel too bad.</p>
<p>"Well, I think you can probably guess Edythe's feelings on the matter. She's ecstatic that I've finally given in to my own desire. She has always been an advocate of selfishness."</p>
<p>I gave him a reproving look. "That's not a very nice thing to say about your sister."</p>
<p>He was nonplussed. "I'm afraid I'm not always the most loving brother in the world. We have these spats quite a bit. I just wish she wasn't treating this-" He gestured between us. "-like some trivial argument about music preferences."</p>
<p>I was about to probe further, but at that moment Mr Banner, King of Excellent Timing, walked into the room pushing a bulky black cart with an antiquated television and VCR setup on it. The atmosphere in the room lifted instantly and at last the attention moved off of us. Nothing was more exciting than a movie day. Mr Banner didn't say anything about taking notes as he wrestled with the video tape, so a lot of people began putting away their notebooks and pens and settling in for an easy class. I left mine out but didn't uncap the pen, instead tapping it softly against the paper. At last, the VCR accepted the tape and started whirring to life, and Mr Banner crossed the room to switch off the lights.</p>
<p>We were suddenly plunged into darkness and the electric charge I had felt in my room the other night came back in full force. I was abruptly hyperaware of the sheer lack of distance between Edward and I, less than an inch separating us from our hands all the way up to our shoulders. The current seemed to jump across the space, zinging through me and making me feel on edge in the best way. I had a strong, irrational urge to cradle his face again, to brush my fingers along his cheekbone in the dark where no one could see. At the same time, doing that here, in this big public space with so many people around, felt fundamentally wrong. Those moments we had shared, so few, so precious, so hard won in a way, they were something to be treasured and kept private, just for us. I was glad I had resisted when the opening credits began, and the room was lit up just enough for the shapes of people to be visible; anyone who happened to glance back would see what I was doing. My eyes slid sideways almost without permission, and I nearly giggled when I saw Edward was doing the same thing. His eyes burned, clearly feeling the same charge that I was, and so intense that it made me feel a little woozy. We grinned at each other for a moment, then I felt a tiny spark in the electric field as his little finger reached out and poked my hand again. As he pulled it back into his fist, I quickly extended my own finger and curled it around his, holding him in place by force of will if not actual physical strength. He seemed a tad startled for half a second, then relaxed and squeezed my finger gently.</p>
<p>It was a long class, longer than even the most interminable Calculus or horrific Gym lessons. I couldn't even focus on the film enough to say what it was about, never mind actually use any of the no doubt vital information it contained. The subtle lightning kept coursing throughout my body, centred on that one point of connection between Edward and I. All I could pay attention to was those delicately entwined fingers. I thought about McKayla and Jeremy, holding hands so everyone would know they were an item, showing off their togetherness for everyone to see. This wasn't quite holding hands, and it certainly wasn't public and ostentatious, but it had what I imagined would be the same effect – the feeling of connection, the sense of being joined with another person, sharing a space and a moment, just this moment, soon to end but for now, perfect. Each time I looked over at Edward, I could tell he felt the same way; there was a different set to his shoulders, less worried tension and more proud poise. He smiled whenever he caught me looking, and I couldn't help making mental comparisons to the glares of that first hour sat at this table. It felt like we were both different people, so much had changed, so much was new. I knew which version of Edward I preferred, that much was certain.</p>
<p>At last, the light came on again. Edward released my finger, not sharply enough to be insulting but quick enough so that no one around us would have seen. I didn't mind, thinking again about private moments. I wasn't ready to share those with the world yet.</p>
<p>"Well, that was certainly an experience," he commented nonchalantly.</p>
<p>I could only hum in agreement, flexing my fingers a few times as I packed my stuff away. We joined the tide of students leaving class and I felt a little unsteady on my feet. Not enough to wobble or be noticeable, but enough that I knew Gym was going to be interesting today.</p>
<p>"Back to our conversation from before," I ventured once we were outside and curving towards the gym. "What about your other siblings?"</p>
<p>Edward shrugged dismissively. "As I've said before, they think I'm insane."</p>
<p>I frowned. "But didn't you also say they're angry with you?"</p>
<p>"Yes, but to be honest that's mostly Rosalie. She's absolutely furious at how I am, in her eyes, endangering the family by going public with this."</p>
<p>Too much to unpack there for the length of time we had; I saved further questions for another time, knowing I wasn't likely to forget, especially if the girl kept glaring at me.</p>
<p>"And the others?"</p>
<p>"Jasper is of Rosalie's mind as well, but more... concerned. He's always been a pragmatic individual and he can't help thinking of certain... solutions to any potential problems. His current thoughts are causing a bit of tension between us." He saw my concerned expression and immediately started waving away any potential expressions of worry. "Nothing we can't handle, and we've probably had worse conflicts in the past. It will pass. Eleanor is a little worried, but generally fairly chilled about it, just like she is about everything. Alice..." He sighed heavily. "Alice is as exultant as Edythe. They're a frequent tag team, but I don't often have their combined efforts turned against me and it's exhausting."</p>
<p>"I'm not sure I understand," I admitted.</p>
<p>He thought for a moment, trying to find the right phrasing.</p>
<p>"My sisters... have a very high opinion of me, much better than I have of myself. They believe there are certain things I am deserving of, that the universe owes me, I suppose. They think – Edythe especially – that if I want something and it isn't hurting anybody, then I should have it. Not to mention that Alice saw this outcome as a possibility, and she has absolute faith in her visions."</p>
<p>We had reached the entrance to the gym by that point. I wasn't entirely sure that I understood what he meant about Alice and Edythe, but the takeaway was that they approved of me, and that was something to be pleased about. Before I left for class, I had one more question. "And what about my brother? Concerned or celebratory?"</p>
<p>Edward grinned. "Beau is planning to tell you everything he is thinking later, and has very pointedly asked me, <em>told</em> me really, not to give you any warnings."</p>
<p>"He won't know," I protested. "Come on, give me something."</p>
<p>He shook his head stubbornly. "No, he would figure it out. He is just as perceptive as you are, and he can read you much better than I can. Besides, you need to get to class."</p>
<p>I sighed, resigned. It seemed he could be just as obstinate as I was when he wanted to be. I turned to leave, then whirled around on the same step as another thought occurred to me. "You aren't going to be watching, are you?"</p>
<p>His expression was all innocence, <em>too </em>innocent – I had hit on exactly his plan.</p>
<p>I groaned. "Please don't. I can handle you overhearing some conversations or whatever but watching me do Gym is just going to be embarrassing for both of us."</p>
<p>Edward chuckled softly. "I'm sure it isn't that bad. Besides, there's been enough reference to your PE perils at this point to make me curious. Just... do me a favour?"</p>
<p>"No," I said peevishly.</p>
<p>I almost instantly regretted my attitude when he reached out and cupped my cheek, drifting his fingers down the curve of my jaw and off the point of my chin. The skin along the path he'd followed began tingling alarmingly, my mind went blank and my heart took off.</p>
<p>"Try not to actually hurt yourself," he murmured seriously.</p>
<p>Numbly, I nodded. He smiled softly, said, "I'll see you after class," then turned and walked away. I had to take a moment to recover my equilibrium before I scurried into the building to change.</p>
<p>I was barely aware of the people around me as I dressed, my brain stuck on a loop replaying that moment of connection over and over again. Finally, I was snapped back to attention when someone passed me a racquet – we were starting badminton today. I'd apparently already forgotten yesterday's introductory lecture. My classmates were watching me nervously and I couldn't blame them; the racquet was lightweight but nevertheless felt like it might easily become a weapon in my hands. Beau already had a wide area around him where no one apparently dared to stand. He gave me a sheepish grin when he spotted me looking at him. When Coach Clapp told us to pair up, he came right up to me.</p>
<p>"Want to spare everyone the horror of being our partners?" he suggested. "You never know, could be fun."</p>
<p>"Could be a complete train wreck, you mean," I said, rolling my eyes at him. "We'll land ourselves in the hospital."</p>
<p>Coach Clapp agreed, apparently. "Oh no, Swans, you know the rules. Split yourselves up before I do it for you."</p>
<p>Beau looked about to argue, but McKayla stepped in. "I'll be your partner, Bella. Beau, Logan hasn't got anybody yet."</p>
<p>Logan didn't exactly look happy with that idea, but I guess he thought Beau was at least a better option than me because he waved him over to his court.</p>
<p>I turned to McKayla, apologetic look already in place. "Thanks, Kay. I know this probably isn't your idea of a perfect pairing."</p>
<p>"No worries, I know how to steer clear by now." She was grinning like it was some sort of inside joke, rather than a well-known fact to anyone in our class or indeed the rest of the school.</p>
<p>It was just as disastrous as I'd predicted, even with Beau and I on separate teams. At one point I managed to make a swing that both clipped McKayla in the shoulder and whacked myself in the head. After that I stayed right out of the way and only went for shots that came towards me in the back corner, which wasn't very many. I glanced over at Beau two courts down in much the same position and couldn't help smiling just a little bit. McKayla made an impressive show despite basically playing by herself, claiming victory in three out of four matches. I gave her a high five at the end of class.</p>
<p>"Nice playing," I commented.</p>
<p>"Thanks," she preened, flipping her hair over her shoulder. "I'll be honest, I've played with your brother enough times that it's second nature by now. I'm sure if I had a really good partner I'd be totally lost." She laughed as she led the way into the locker room. I spotted Logan and Beau going into the boys' changing room deep in conversation. I hoped Beau wasn't talking to him about the other day; I'd asked him not to, but I wouldn't put it past him to go into overprotective big brother mode without me there to keep him in check.</p>
<p>I got changed in a hurry, the perils of gym already drifting from my memory as anticipation started to build up. Would Edward want to drive me home? It hardly made sense, given that he would have to hang around to pick up Edythe, but then again, if I thought about it that say then showing up to give me a ride this morning didn't make sense either. Would he be waiting for me outside class like earlier, or should I meet him at his car? And what if the older Cullens were at their car when I got there? I remembered Rosalie's glare; I wasn't sure I could handle that level of scrutiny up close.</p>
<p>As I walked out of the Gym building, I was trying to decide whether I should hunt down Beau and convince him to let me take the truck by myself, or just walk home on my own, either way bypassing the issue entirely. But it was all moot – there was Edward, leaning on the wall again, totally relaxed. I felt that surge of rightness again, as if a hollow loneliness I hadn't noticed had been chased away by the return of his disarming presence. All my worries fled, at least for the moment.</p>
<p>"Hi," I breathed, my smile bursting out on instinct.</p>
<p>"Hello again," he said, mirroring my smile with far more devastating, dazzling effect. "Good class?"</p>
<p>"Pretty good," I replied breezily, trying to seem unaffected.</p>
<p>His eyes were knowing. "Oh yes? How's your head?"</p>
<p>I turned crimson and huffed indignantly. "I cannot believe you. I told you not to watch."</p>
<p>I started marching towards the parking lot, intent on getting into the truck and begging Edythe's forgiveness later – she'd understand that her brother was being a pig – but he kept pace with me without an issue.</p>
<p>"I'm sorry," he said, not sounding it at all.</p>
<p>"You're a terrible liar."</p>
<p>That made him laugh, which only made me fume more.</p>
<p>As we got to our cars, it looked like my vehicle choice might be made for me. The path to the truck was open, but the Volvo was surrounded by students, most of them freshman and sophomore boys, all of them practically drooling. Looking closer, I realised they were actually clustered around Rosalie's shiny red car. Nevertheless, I started angling toward the truck. A tug on my sleeve made me look down; Edward had hold of my jacket, and when I looked back at his face, he was frowning.</p>
<p>"Alright lemmings!" came the loud call of my brother's voice from behind me before Edward could say anything. "Show's over! Clear out if you know what's good for you."</p>
<p>I turned back over my shoulder to see Beau approaching, the picture of calm and casual attitude, one arm slung around Edythe's shoulder as they walked. She had on her typical mild expression, a pleasant but largely disinterested air that somehow held just a hint of menace. I wasn't sure if it was the tension around her eyes or something in the set of her mouth, like she was almost but not quite baring her teeth. Whatever it was, the look made me shudder ever so slightly. I glanced at Edward and saw he was wearing a similar expression.</p>
<p>The members of the crowd obviously felt the impact of their looks too, as most of them scattered immediately on spotting the two Cullens. One brave soul, who I knew was a junior like us but whose name I couldn't summon up at that moment, instead crossed his arms and stepped forward.</p>
<p>"Oh, come on, Swan," he griped. "We're just looking."</p>
<p>"Uh huh." Beau sounded unconvinced. "I'm sure none of you left any sticky fingerprints on the paintwork. But if you want to explain it to Rosalie, be my guest. I'm not hanging around to step in for you when she goes postal on your ass."</p>
<p>That did it; the boy's eyes went wide and frightened, and he scurried off after his fellows.</p>
<p>"Well that was just plain mean," Edythe commented.</p>
<p>Beau shrugged. "Not as bad as what Rosalie would have done to him. Speaking of avoiding your delightful sister, do we want to be here when the others turn up or are we making our escape?"</p>
<p>"Escape, I think," Edward put in. "There's a time and place for that confrontation and this isn't it."</p>
<p>"Would it be a confrontation?" I wondered. Was Rosalie, a girl I'd never even spoken to, really that unhappy with me?</p>
<p>The response to my question came from Edythe, and it was deceptively blasé. "Everything is a confrontation when Rose is in a mood. Which is most of the time, if we're being candid. You can't avoid it forever, brother." She gave him a pointed look and I knew instinctually that she was saying more, just not out loud. "But you're right, this isn't the appropriate spot for a battlefield. Meet you back at Chez Swan?"</p>
<p>Edward nodded mutely and headed for the driver's side of the Volvo, now accessible without the throng of teenage car enthusiasts. Beau and Edythe crossed to the truck and clambered in. I dithered for a moment, then decided that, angry or not, I really didn't want to have to walk home. I hurried over and climbed into the front seat of the silver car. There was an awkward silence between us as Edward pulled out and got on the highway back towards my house. He was the one to finally break it.</p>
<p>"Are you very cross with me for watching you in Gym? I assure you, I was only curious. I'm not trying to make fun of you."</p>
<p>I fidgeted uncomfortably. "It's not like it's a secret that I'm bad at sports. And you know my brother already, we're two peas in a pod when it comes to coordination. I guess..." I could feel myself blushing, knowing this was an incredibly self-centred admission. "Does it make sense when I say that I want you to see the best of me, and only the best? I mean, I'm sure you've seen me trip a hundred times but... it just feels different, to know you're watching something like that on purpose. It makes me feel like I'm some kind of... sideshow act."</p>
<p>He pulled over sharply to the curb; with a quick glance out of the window, I saw we were already home.</p>
<p>Edward looked aghast. "Do you think that's how I see you? As a cheap, fleeting entertainment?"</p>
<p>I shrugged, feeling so weak and helpless as I twisted my fingers together in my lap. I didn't want to admit that he had hit upon exactly my fear – that I interested him for now, but that it wasn't destined to last. Tears began beading at the corner of my eyes and I willed them away. The last thing I needed to do was cry in front of him.</p>
<p>"You couldn't be more wrong," he murmured softly, fervently, and when I let myself look into his eyes again, they were burning with some deep emotion I couldn't quite identify. The moment of connection stretched long, the electricity crackling in the air around us once again. I kept expecting it to get weaker with time, or to get used to it and perhaps no longer notice it. If anything, it was getting stronger, especially when he did things like this.</p>
<p>"Do I take it," Edward said, breaking the stillness but not our eye contact, "that you do actually believe what you said to McKayla earlier? You think you care more for me than I do for you?"</p>
<p>I nodded numbly, my throat suddenly too dry to speak.</p>
<p>"What makes you think that?" He seemed genuinely perplexed.</p>
<p>I swallowed hard and prayed it was enough to coat my throat and give me some voice. It half worked; when I spoke, it was a hushed whisper but not rough or hoarse.</p>
<p>"I can't be completely certain... I mean, I don't know what you're thinking, and I can never be sure I'm reading your face right, but... it feels like sometimes..." I trailed off, then re-evaluated, made a small face and carried on. "A lot of the time, actually, we'll be talking and you're saying something completely normal – or mostly normal – but it feels like the whole time you're actually trying to say goodbye."</p>
<p>"So perceptive," he whispered, mostly to himself. He stared into my face for a moment as if the secrets of the universe were hidden in my features. I looked away, uncomfortable under the scrutiny.</p>
<p>"But you know that proves I'm right, don't you?" he went on more insistently. "If saying goodbye is what's right for you, if I have to choose between hurting you and leaving..." He winced, and I wasn't sure which thought pained him more. "Then I'll go, no matter how much I don't want to. Keeping you safe is more important."</p>
<p>I frowned. "You don't think I could do that?"</p>
<p>His face was grim. "It's not a choice you would ever have to make."</p>
<p>"And if I don't care about being safe? If I'd rather be with you, no matter what?"</p>
<p>This was a big conversation we were getting into, and I knew it. Hardly suitable for the front seat of his car parked outside my house with my brother likely to show up any minute. As if the thought had summoned him, the truck roared around the corner at exactly that moment.</p>
<p>"You should go in," Edward said, dodging my question deftly. "Your brother wants to talk to you."</p>
<p>I let him off the hook, just this once. The electricity hadn't lessened in the air, and I felt like a break might be in everyone's best interest. But before I went, I fixed him with a hard stare.</p>
<p>"Will you be eavesdropping again?"</p>
<p>That at least made him smile, very slightly. "Not to worry. Beau has already requested privacy for a few hours this evening. Besides, as loathe as I am to subject myself to it, I really must face the music at home. I may not be back before you go to sleep."</p>
<p>I was abruptly worried for him, even as my heart ached at the idea that I wouldn't see him until tomorrow. "You're not actually going to fight with your family over me, are you? Because I'm really not worth it."</p>
<p>He shook his head. "You don't see yourself clearly at all. You are worth a lot more than you think, certainly a lot more than the inconvenience of a minor squabble with my siblings."</p>
<p>Edward reached out his hand, less tentative than he had been before, and cradled the side of my face. His eyes held mine, intense and glorious and far too overwhelming. Only when my head began to feel light did I realised that I had stopped breathing. I sucked in a shaky lungful of air and the moment broke. His eyes slid closed, releasing me from the gravity of his gaze. The world rushed back into focus and I heard the distinct creaky slam of the doors on the truck.</p>
<p>"See you tomorrow then," I said, proud of myself when my voice didn't wobble.</p>
<p>"Tomorrow," he confirmed. He was staring out at the dark clouds which were gradually descending, contemplative and serious.</p>
<p>"Do I get to ask questions again?"</p>
<p>That made him smirk. "Absolutely not. Don't think I didn't notice all the ones you slipped in today. Besides, I'm not nearly finished."</p>
<p>"What else is there?" I asked, genuinely exasperated; it felt like we'd gone over every insignificant detail of my life today.</p>
<p>His eyes were warm now as he chuckled, and I silently prayed for more of those looks in our future. "You'll find out tomorrow. Go on, Beau's waiting."</p>
<p>With a sigh, I opened the door, the cold air clearing my head somewhat, and climbed out. Edythe was just approaching, having apparently already said her goodbyes to Beau, who was on the porch groping for the key under the eave. She smiled and grabbed my hand briefly, squeezing reassuringly as she took my place in the front passenger seat of the Volvo. Then the car was speeding away.</p>
<p>Taking a deep, calming breath, I turned to follow my brother up the driveway. He'd got the door open and was shrugging out of his jacket; I hurried inside so we could shut out the cold.</p>
<p>"Alright," Beau said, clapping his hands together with a worrying determination. "Let's do this. Ways that everyone and their cousin can tell that Edward Cullen is head over heels for my sister, number one."</p>
<p>I blanched – did he actually have a list? "Can I at least dump my stuff and get started on dinner first?"</p>
<p>He sighed in deep exasperation, then hooked my bag off my shoulder, dropped it on the floor beside his own and set about extracting me from my jacket, talking all the while.</p>
<p>"Number one, he willingly has conversations with you, believe me, that never happens. Number two, eye contact that is not hostile and-or derogatory, also a big step for him."</p>
<p>My jacket safely hung up – and my spluttered protests soundly ignored – he began propelling me towards the kitchen. I shook him off roughly and whirled around arms crossed.</p>
<p>"Would you stop that! Manhandling me like that is not cool, Beau."</p>
<p>He had the decency to look chagrined. I used the interruption to put a stop to his moronic list.</p>
<p>"Look, I'm not questioning whether he likes me. I'm not <em>that </em>stupid, no matter what the two of you may have implied several times in the last week."</p>
<p>Beau was perplexed. "Then what's the problem? Why the pity party this morning?"</p>
<p>I repeated loosely what I'd said to Edward in the car and his response as I started gathering the ingredients for chilli. My brother sat at the table, leaning his chin on his hand and listening with growing concern and compassion in his eyes.</p>
<p>"So there you have it," I finished weakly. "Sure, he likes me now, but if he's already thinking about leaving... I mean, I can't possibly keep him. I'm just me and he's him. There's no comparison."</p>
<p>Beau was thoughtful for a moment, obviously mulling over what I had said and trying to choose the best response. The only sound in the kitchen was the rhythmic thunk of my knife against the chopping block as I diced onions.</p>
<p>"I won't say I don't understand where you're coming from," he began slowly; I got the sense he was choosing his words very carefully. "Because Edythe is beyond phenomenal and I have never had any idea why she picked somebody like me out of everybody. And yeah, I worry that one day she won't be interested in me anymore and she'll just disappear into the aether. But that's my own neurosis, it's not based on anything she's ever said or done."</p>
<p>The oil and onions I had added to a pot on the stove sizzled slightly as I slowly stirred in a packet of minced beef. "So it's me then? I'm just not worth hanging around for?"</p>
<p>"No, no, no," Beau rushed out. "That's not what I mean, and I don't think it's what Edward's saying either."</p>
<p>I turned to him with an eyebrow arched in a 'really?' expression that he was able to read easily.</p>
<p>"I won't claim to know Edward well," he said in an almost warning tone. "But from what I've gathered between observations and conversations with Edythe, especially in the last few weeks, the guy can be a bit… well, not to put too fine a point on it, a bit of a drama queen. He overreacts to just about everything, or at least everything that really matters to him, which very much includes you." He gave me a look. "The problem is that his reactions are almost always negative. Not to mention he's got a twisted picture of himself and insecurities coming out of his ears." He smirked. "No wonder you two like each other so much, you have matching self-conscious streaks."</p>
<p>I gave him a dour look. "Thank you so much, my dear, complimentary brother."</p>
<p>"Hey, I just tell it like it is. My point being, all this stuff about leaving is really just his personal crap coming to the surface with a focus, an action he can take to 'fix it'." He made big air quotes with his fingers. "You've given him a focal point that he hasn't ever had before, by all accounts. He doesn't know what he's doing any more than you do, but he's got this feeling from somewhere that it's not okay, that he shouldn't have it, that there's a fundamental problem with the two of you being together. It's not you, Bells, it's all on him."</p>
<p>The pot behind me was making some concerning noises; I turned and stirred furiously, putting some of my frustration into the movement of the spoon as I simultaneously escaped the confusing and somewhat overwhelming train of thought my brother was trying to lead my on.</p>
<p>"That still doesn't make any sense," I huffed angrily.</p>
<p>"Look," Beau said, coming around to be in at least my peripheral vision. "I won't lie, I'm invested in the two of you having a relationship. Not just because it would be super cool – I mean, can you even imagine what the odds are of two siblings both falling in love with vampires, who also happen to be siblings? But I also want you to be happy, and I know he makes you happy, when he's not being infuriating, which I get is often."</p>
<p>I hummed in agreement, not choosing to examine the way my heart spluttered when he said the 'L' word.</p>
<p>"At the same time," he went on. "I'm your brother, and I don't want you getting jerked around by some idiot who's making you feel like you're not worth his time. I mean, you should be the most important thing in the world to him, which I think you are, but you should know it, without a doubt. Maybe it's time Edward gets a good big brotherly talking to. You know, instructions on how to treat my sister right."</p>
<p>Irritation flared, sudden and unexpected, at the idea that he felt he had to insert himself into my life like that.</p>
<p>"I can take care of myself, Beau," I snapped, whirling away towards the next bit of ingredient prep.</p>
<p>"Seriously, let me talk to him, maybe I can-"</p>
<p>"Just butt out, okay!" I shouted, surprising myself with the force of it. "I don't need you to fix everything for me!"</p>
<p>Beau looked like I'd slapped him before his face smoothed. He was aiming for emotionally detached and unaffected, but I knew my brother – he only got like this when something had hurt him badly.</p>
<p>It had never been me before.</p>
<p>Guilt twisted my insides, but before I could work out what to say to make it better he was hurrying out of the room. I felt tears begin to bead up and hastily swiped them away, focusing all my attention on dinner. It didn't completely work; that instant of hurt on my brother's face kept drifted across my subconscious. And yet for the life of me I couldn't think of what I could do or say to fix it. I was only dimly aware of Charlie getting home, waving absentmindedly when he stuck his head into the kitchen to say hi.</p>
<p>I hadn't fully composed myself when I called the boys in to dinner and no-one was talking as we all began to eat.</p>
<p>Charlie looked back and forth between us, obviously sensing the still bubbling tension. "Is everything okay with you two?"</p>
<p>"Fine," I said, a little too quickly. I focused on my food, giving much more attention than necessary to getting a perfectly proportioned fork full of chilli and rice.</p>
<p>"Bella has a date on Saturday."</p>
<p>There was a loud clatter as both mine and Charlie's forks landed on our plates. I was shocked into inaction for half a second, then my eyes narrowed on my brother and I felt my expression turn murderous. My guilt had well and truly vanished.</p>
<p>"Beaufort," I said in a warning tone.</p>
<p>"A date?" Charlie asked, sounding perplexed. "But I thought you two weren't going to the dance."</p>
<p>"We're not," I agreed, trying to signal to Beau that he was on thin ice and he should take the chance to back-track now. Never had I so wished for his stupid twin telepathy theory to be true.</p>
<p>Beau wasn't getting the message. "No, it's not the dance. He's taking her to Seattle."</p>
<p>Forget trying to communicate with Beau; now I was willing the ground to open up and swallow him whole. Angry tears started brewing at the corners of my eyes. I had never felt more betrayed in my life.</p>
<p>Charlie turned to me, eyebrows raised. "Bella, is this true?"</p>
<p>I wanted so badly to deny it. I also wanted to rant and rage and scream at my brother. I knew I had upset him, but I didn't think that he would respond by doing something like this. There was a very good reason why I hadn't told Charlie about Edward yet; still, I hadn't planned on keeping him a secret forever. Beau had just steamrollered over any ideas I might have had about gently easing my father into the idea of me having a boy in my life, romantically. Right now though, it was useless to lie. I was no good at it, and Charlie knew me too well - he would see right through it.</p>
<p>"Yes," I said through gritted teeth, glaring daggers at Beau again before turning as calm a look as I could manage on Charlie. "Look, Dad, it's really new, okay? We're still getting to know each other and I didn't want to tell you about it until I was sure there was something to tell you, you know?"</p>
<p>Charlie sighed deeply. "I understand that Bella, but… well, I know I'm not your mother, and I know you may not think that you can talk to me about this kind of thing, but I want you to. I want you to feel at home here, like you can come to me with anything. Instead you're keeping secrets and essentially going behind my back. I'm very disappointed in you, young lady. Honestly, I've half a mind not to let you go out on Saturday at all."</p>
<p>"I'm sorry, Dad." I hung my head, flooded with shame. Whatever else you could say about Charlie's parenting style, he had the severe, chastising dad voice down pat. He knew exactly how to make you feel awful about what you'd done, just with his tone and the look on his face.</p>
<p>"Don't you sit there smirking, Beau," he carried on, and when I glanced up I saw that there was indeed a self-satisfied expression quickly melting off of my brother's face.</p>
<p>"What did I do?" he said indignantly.</p>
<p>"Don't even try it," Charlie warned. "You knew about this, which means most likely Bella told you about it, which also means you had to know how she felt about telling me. As much as I wish she would have told me herself, that was her choice and it was not fair of you to take it from her like that. That's not what being a good brother looks like. Now apologise."</p>
<p>Beau was now downright affronted. "You can't be serious."</p>
<p>Charlie just raised an eyebrow and waited. I was still quietly seething but beginning to feel slightly triumphant.</p>
<p>Beau huffed in irritation and crossed his arms. For a minute I thought he might actually refuse to say anything, but then he muttered a disgruntled, "Sorry," just barely loud enough to be heard.</p>
<p>"You can do better than that," Charlie insisted, a prompt and a warning all wrapped up in one.</p>
<p>I fidgeted uncomfortably; it felt like we were five years old again, getting told to apologise to each other for squabbling over a toy. I wanted to admit to my angry words, to claim responsibility for the whole thing, but that would open up an entirely new can of worms that really did <em>not </em>need to be brought to Charlie's attention.</p>
<p>Beau looked like he was feeling just as awkward as me. Then he raised his chin and held my gaze, a determined look on his face.</p>
<p>"Bella, I'm sorry for telling Dad about Edward before you were ready."</p>
<p>I nodded, muttered, "Thanks," and both of us turned our focus to our plates.</p>
<p>Charlie chuckled. "See, was that so hard?". Then, after a short pause, he said, "So, Edward, huh?"</p>
<p>"Dad!" I whined. Did we have to talk about this right now?</p>
<p>"Alright, alright, I get it." He held up his hands in surrender. "Do I know him, at least?"</p>
<p>"I think so," I hedged, not entirely sure if he did. "He's actually Edythe's brother."</p>
<p>"You don't say!" Charlie looked pleasantly surprised for a second, then frowned. "Not the blond one, is it? I'm sure he's a nice boy but he seems too old for you."</p>
<p>"No, Edward's a junior like us."</p>
<p>"He's Edythe's bio-brother," Beau chimed in. "The one that's got the same hair colour as her. And Jasper is with Alice, remember?"</p>
<p>"Sure, sure," Charlie said, clearly not remembering. "Well, that's alright then."</p>
<p>And that seemed to be that, from Charlie's perspective at least. I distracted him by asking him about work for the rest of dinner. When we were done, Beau set about doing the dishes without having to be asked; Charlie gratefully retired to the living room, while I excused myself to do some homework. Between the evenings spent with Edward and the Port Angeles trip, I did actually have a bit of a backlog building, and it served as an effective diversion for a while. Then I reached the point where all I had left was studying for the Trig test that was coming up after Spring Break and my carefully constructed walls all fell apart. Math in all its forms had never been my friend, and it didn't hold my attention well enough to keep me from thinking about the situation with Beau. I didn't feel like anything had really been settled. His apology had been forced and sounded rehearsed; I could tell he wasn't really sorry for what he did. Then there was the matter that had started it all, his insistence on interfering in my relationship – if it could be called that yet – with Edward. I worried that he was going to somehow corner him at school and give him a talking to and thereby potentially reveal something I didn't want revealed to yet another person. I realised suddenly what all this secret keeping about the Cullens had done, something I hadn't recognised or even thought possible until this moment – I had lost my trust in my brother. I had always thought we were on the same side, two against the world despite the miles between us. But now I genuinely didn't know what he would do next, and it scared me.</p>
<p>Adding to my distraction, my eyes kept drifting to the window I had left open, hoping that Edward would appear despite his certainty that he wouldn't make it here tonight. Part of me wanted to go and see if Edythe was here so she could call him over, or perhaps give me his number. But that felt vaguely stalkerish. Besides, I really wasn't ready to see Beau again yet, and I kind of hoped that Edythe was with her brother to give him some back-up against whatever adversity he was facing from their other siblings. So I spent my evening alone, eventually falling into a restless sleep far too late into the night.</p>
<p>The next morning was quiet. Not the comfortable quiet that usually hung over our mornings, but a tense, charged silence that felt like something was going to explode. Everyone seemed on some level to understand what I had figured out last night – the conflict wasn't over. Charlie left for work at the last possible moment, eyeing Beau and I nervously, as if he didn't want to leave us alone. I wished him a good day as pleasantly as I could, avoiding any eye contact with my brother as I went to get my stuff together.</p>
<p>Edythe and Edward showed up almost as soon as Charlie was gone. There was no chit-chat today; Beau said a cursory good morning to Edward, then took Edythe's hand and towed her toward the truck while I made a beeline for the Volvo. I knew Edward didn't need to be a mind reader to know that there was something going on between us, but I wondered what he might be seeing in Beau's head. Very kindly, he waited until we were both in the car and on our way before asking about it.</p>
<p>"Are you alright? You seem... upset."</p>
<p>I shrugged, watching the trees pass outside the window. "Beau and I are in a bit of a fight. It's nothing."</p>
<p>"Clearly not," Edward disagreed. "I was under the impression that you two got on very well, that it took something big to set you at odds. I understand if you think it's none of my business but…"</p>
<p>I made the mistake of turning to look at him when his pause stretched too long. He was looking back at me with the full force of his eyes, the look that was like a truth serum to me.</p>
<p>"He told Charlie about us," I admitted reluctantly, gesturing vaguely between the two of us. "So now my dad knows we're going out on Saturday, when I wasn't ready to tell him."</p>
<p>"Oh, I see." Despite his words, Edward's brow was furrowed in confusion.</p>
<p>I sighed. "I know it doesn't make sense. It's a moot point now though. He approves, by the way. Once he worked out which brother you were."</p>
<p>That made him chuckle. "That's nice to hear. Do you know why Beau told him?"</p>
<p>"It was my own fault. We were arguing about something else and I yelled at him."</p>
<p>
  <em>Please don't ask what the argument was about.</em>
</p>
<p>"Can I do anything?" he asked, concern in his eyes that made my heart melt in the most cliché way possible.</p>
<p>"Distract me?" I requested.</p>
<p>He happily delivered, launching back into his interrogation as if we hadn't had a more than twelve-hour interruption. And thankfully not touching on the fight any further.</p>
<p>We drove the rest of the way to school, parked by Rosalie's flashy car again and walked to English. The whole time, Edward was asking me questions like a rapid-fire psychoanalysis session. It continued during the walk to lunch and the entire time I was eating – I insisted on buying my own food today – virtually without pause. I worried that I was starting to bore him, but he seemed completely enthralled by everything I had to say. Every now and then, something he asked me would make me blush, causing him to divert into a whole new line of questioning to figure out what had caused it. I kept thinking he had to run out of things to ask at some point, but the flow only stopped when we got to Biology.</p>
<p>The movie was still going, and we spent another hour in the dark, electricity humming around us so strongly that I was surprised it didn't start to attract people's attention. Today, however, he was clearly feeling bolder; when the lights went out, he reached over and laid his hand over mine where it was resting flat on the desk. His fingers slipped into the gaps between mine and, after a minute of hesitation, curled gently against the top of my palm. I stayed still for a moment myself, then, emboldened by the soft squeeze of his thumb against the base of my little finger, I folded my fingers under too, gripping his fingertips with what I hoped was enough pressure to let him know that he could move if it was overwhelming him, but that I didn't really want him to.</p>
<p>He didn't release his grip until just a fraction of a second before the lights came back on. My hand tingled all the way to Gym, where he once again stroked softly down the side of my face, all the way from hairline to chin and just barely brushing my neck with the flat of his fingernails.</p>
<p>As I watched McKayla single-handedly defeat another three pairs at badminton, I was finally without distractions for long enough to start thinking about Beau again. I still wasn't any closer to figuring out how to reconcile from our argument, short of just apologising and hoping that was enough. I couldn't pinpoint exactly what it was about his words that had upset me so much, so explaining was out of the question – I didn't have an explanation. No, 'sorry' would have to do. It would need to be the most sincere and genuine apology I had ever made, and even then it might not be enough. But I would try.</p>
<p>Thus resolved, I was even more eager than usual for Gym to be over so I could talk to my brother. I hurried through changing at the end of class, hoping to catch him before we got to Edythe and Edward – complete privacy was too much to ask for, but I would rather avoid that particular audience.</p>
<p>Beau, however, apparently had plans of his own, because he was waiting outside the girls' locker room when I came out.</p>
<p>"Can we talk?" he asked nervously, as if he were worried I was going to start yelling again. But I just nodded and followed him down a side corridor. Not the one Logan had pulled me down, thankfully; this seemed to lead to the Coach's office.</p>
<p>There was a moment of awkward silence when we stopped walking. I hitched my bag more firmly onto my shoulder and Beau scuffed the ground with his toe, not looking at me. Then we both spoke, that creepy unplanned in-sync thing again.</p>
<p>"I'm sorry."</p>
<p>Beau looked startled, then frowned; I could feel a matching expression on my face.</p>
<p>"What are you apologising for?" I asked, realising too late that it sounded almost like an accusation. Not the right attitude, Bella.</p>
<p>He looked at me like I was crazy. "For ratting you out to Charlie, of course. I talked to Edythe this morning and she helped me see how it was a dumb thing to do, for lots of reasons. I'm really sorry, Bell." Now he was the picture of sadness and regret, much more than I felt the situation warranted.</p>
<p>I shook my head. "I started it. I shouldn't have yelled at you like that, it wasn't fair."</p>
<p>"Yeah, but..." he started, but cut himself off with a laugh. "Look at us. Now we're arguing about who started our argument. This is ridiculous."</p>
<p>I smiled. "Can we just agree that it's over? I hate fighting with you."</p>
<p>"Of course it's over." He pulled me into a warm, secure hug. "I love you, Bella."</p>
<p>"Love you too," I replied, then stepped back. "Come on, let's go home."</p>
<p>It was incredible the difference that one short conversation had made to my mood. I was practically skipping as Beau and I walked out of the Gym building. Edythe and Edward were already waiting for us, and Beau was clearly feeling the same thrill that I was because his greeting kiss was a new level of exuberant. Edward made a face and ostentatiously turned his back on our siblings – not that either of them noticed. It was such a normal response, so human, that I couldn't help smiling. He smiled back, then began leading the way to his car.</p>
<p>The drive home was yet more questions, but they were different now. Rather than peppering me with fast, frivolous things, he wanted to know more details about home. He had me describing each little thing, especially ones he wasn't familiar with, and I found myself for the first time having to put into words what it was about Phoenix that I loved so much. Objectively, the barren landscape and sparse vegetation probably didn't sound very appealing. I found myself gesturing expansively, trying to properly convey the beauty of the dusty valleys between rough mountain peaks, spread out under the wide open blue sky. Every time I worried that I was boring him or taking too much of the conversation, Edward asked another follow-up question with eagerness and interest. His fascination, as nonsensical as it seemed, was a consistent reassurance. We sat there for a long time as I talked and he listened with rapt attention.</p>
<p>Eventually, though, he sighed, abruptly sad, and said, "You should probably go in soon. Charlie won't be too much longer."</p>
<p>I looked out of the windscreen, suddenly realising that we must have been sat in the car for hours; the sky was growing dark as the dull light faded behind the trees. Drops of rain lingering on the windshield gave evidence of a recent rain shower that I had apparently been too focused to notice.</p>
<p>"It's getting late," I commented somewhat unnecessarily. "I wonder where Beau and Edythe have got to."</p>
<p>Edward shrugged, looking thoughtful. "I think they planned to hang out elsewhere for a while. Your brother wanted to pay me back for the privacy I gave you two last night."</p>
<p>"But we could have at least gone inside," I pointed out. "I blame you, you've made me talk too much and I don't have any thinking power left."</p>
<p>He chuckled. I half expected the questions to start again, but they didn't. We both sat quiet, watching the sky darkening.</p>
<p>"Twilight," Edward mused. "It's a safe time of day for us, in many ways. But a sad one too. The departure of the sun and the return of night."</p>
<p>"I like the night," I said, not mentioning that I was enjoying it a lot more recently. "Without darkness, we'd never see the stars."</p>
<p>He hummed in agreement, and the quiet descended again as the last faint glow faded.</p>
<p>There was a loud honk from behind us that made me jump. Glancing in the rear-view mirror, I saw the truck pulling up behind us, Beau and Edythe both grinning like lunatics from the cab; they were just barely visible in the glow of the headlights reflecting off the back of the Volvo. In the next moment, their faces were lit by another set of lights, in time for me to see their smiles drop as the sound of another engine caught my ear from the other direction. I turned and watched a dark sedan come around the corner and park against the curb a few hundred yards away. Jules Black got out of the driver's seat, waved cheerfully, and started getting a wheelchair out of the trunk. A severe looking woman with dark skin and long black hair waited in the passenger seat, her gaze shifting between our two vehicles, deeply disapproving. She would have been completely silhouetted if only her car's lights were on, but the truck's lights diffused around our car instead cast strange shadows that made her look even more intimidating. Though I wouldn't have been able to recall her face on my own, I instantly recognised Bonnie Black.</p>
<p>"Not good," Edward muttered sourly.</p>
<p>"What's wrong?" I asked stupidly.</p>
<p>"Well, your friend Julia may not believe the stories that she told you," he said, eyes locked on the woman. "But her mother certainly does."</p>
<p>I was immediately concerned. "Why is she here? Do you think she's going to say something to Charlie?"</p>
<p>"She's going to try. She made an attempt to intervene when Beau and Edythe started dating, which clearly came to nothing, so she knows it probably won't go anywhere, but she feels she has a responsibility to protect her friend's children." He sighed. "Waiting here isn't going to make it any better. You should go inside, Bella."</p>
<p>Clumsily, I gathered my bag and prepared to get out. Then at the last moment, I got a crazy, probably not very sensible idea. I wasn't sure what made me do it, perhaps some petty need to show Bonnie that there was nothing to worry about. Quickly, hoping but not very hopeful that he wouldn't have time to react, I leaned across the centre console. I was very much expecting to meet air and keep going, but he surprised me by holding perfectly still as I pecked him on the cheek. When I pulled back, he looked startled but not the angry I had been fearing.</p>
<p>"Thank you," I said softly, opening my door. Best not to push my luck. "I'll see you tomorrow."</p>
<p>"Later," he corrected, a slightly dazed note in his voice that made me feel very pleased with myself.</p>
<p>"Later then," I agreed and finally climbed out.</p>
<p>Beau and Edythe were already out of the truck, and Jules had the chair assembled and was helping her mom into it.</p>
<p>"Distracted much?" my brother joked as he joined us. "Seriously, how long have you been sat in that car?"</p>
<p>I stuck my tongue out at him; his attempt to take the edge off this suddenly very tense moment was appreciated, although I could see he had a tightness around his eyes that the grin didn't completely mask.</p>
<p>"Don't worry about them," Edythe murmured, not diverted from the point. "Bonnie only wants to make sure you both are safe."</p>
<p>Beau held his smile, but he had an edge to his voice as he replied. "That's as may be, but I swear to God, if she tries to get Charlie to interfere again..."</p>
<p>"She won't," I cut in, not quite sure how I was so confident. "I mean, she had a fight with him over it last time, right? I doubt either of them wants a repeat performance. Besides, who cares? Charlie doesn't control our lives, and Bonnie definitely can't."</p>
<p>Beau tipped his head in a conceding gesture but was kept from saying more by the Blacks coming up close enough to hear us.</p>
<p>"Hey Jules," he said instead, his usual cheerful self. "Hi Bonnie, it's been a while."</p>
<p>"It certainly has," Bonnie agreed. Her voice was faintly gravelly and rang with a wisdom that belied her age. She wasn't any older than our dad, but there was just something about her that exuded ancient knowledge. Her eyes narrowed ever so slightly on Edythe, cutting sideways to Edward too. "Hello there, Edythe."</p>
<p>"Good evening, Mrs Black," Edythe responded, perfectly relaxed and unfailingly polite. "I'm afraid I can't stay and chat, my brother is waiting. But it was lovely to see you, and you, Julia."</p>
<p>"Of course," Bonnie said evenly. "My regards to your parents."</p>
<p>"I'll be sure to pass that along," Edythe assured her, and I definitely wasn't imagining the undertone to both statements – they were warnings.</p>
<p>Edythe put a hand on Beau's shoulder and leaned up, clearly meaning to kiss his cheek, but he turned his head at the last moment and caught her lips with his instead. It was a quick, sweet kiss, yet Bonnie still looked mildly annoyed, her true feelings breaking her polite facade. Jules fidgeted uncomfortably. I caught her gaze and rolled my eyes theatrically, which made her smile a little bit.</p>
<p>"Are you guys coming in?" I asked as I stepped around my brother and his girlfriend, heading up the driveway. "Charlie isn't home yet but he shouldn't be too much longer."</p>
<p>As if on cue, yet another engine noise caught my ears and I looked back to see the cruiser coming around the bend. Edythe hurriedly detached herself from Beau and climbed into my abandoned seat in the Volvo. The car pulled away just as Charlie turned on his blinker to turn in to the driveway, speeding off into the distance. I half jogged the last few feet to the door and started fumbling with my keys, trying desperately to escape the feeling that I was unlocking the door to a battlefield.</p>
<p>This was going to be interesting.</p>
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